Prologue Part 1

Hello people of all worlds, how are you? Well, I find myself in a rather strange and somewhat unreal situation for me, quite depressing and embarrassing.

Now! Why do you ask me how I am doing in this "weird situation" I mentioned? well i died! A bit embarrassing and weird actually.

How do you ask?

Well, *sigh* I had just made a change of countries from the United States to the FAMOUS Japan home of Hen*aham* H-Animes to live in this beautiful country.

BUT strange things happened around me in the third month in tokyo, what things do you ask? well, NOT just one but three trucks tried to run me over that month. as Kizaru always says: ~Really scary~

Damn! I almost took a road roller da! out of nowhere passing near a construction site, but, tell me how the hell a steamroller was on steel beams more than 30 meters above the ground?! No! how did he get there? it even seems that the country does not want me here.

In my second month I found myself in the famous scene of the truck running over a JK or a child, but that's when I had a thought 'Does japan really have the Legendary reincarnations through Truck-sama? Fuck does it really exist?' at that moment i was happy and also scared, why the hell did japan want to kill me?! or the famous Gods or I know what they want with me? I'm a simple normal 16 year old with an above average IQ, I don't have heroic traits or whatever!

Well apart from the weird ability to break the 4 wall Deathpool style baby! well, apart from the sarcasm and mockery he has, but I wish I had that too, oh yes it would be cool! Wait, could the Director or whatever give me this?! Hey, you there! Yes, it's you!

[Author:"How the hell do you do that?"]

"well, I don't know either hahaha! but could we make fun of him?" I asked the apparent nothing? well I don't know!

[Author: "No Fucking! This is hard enough for me now imagine with Deathpool-style sarcasm! And stop breaking the 4th fucking wall like that motherfucker! Powers Activate: Repair!"]

"hold on bro!~~ c'mon don't be mean~~! it's going to be cool with the deathpool sarcasm!" Shit! why can't you give it to me? you black-hearted curmudgeon! Your NEETT!

[Author: "Did you really call me a <black-hearted curmudgeon>?! <NETT> on top of that? Aren't you afraid? well nevermind, let's get on with it!" Hump, lucky for you I'm in a good mood or I'd put you in a room full of beefy Miltans waiting for fresh meat on the morsel to get their fill!]

Shit, he fixed the wall! My God! Out of nowhere I feel my body covered in cold sweat from head to toe! It looks like I saved myself from something! I don't know what it was but I'm sure it was something very bad to have sweated so much.

You know that feeling of barely surviving and you're sweating profusely? Well I got that feeling too but this time it was like I narrowly dodged a bullet! I swear by any entity out there that I will not try to piss off the Director or 'Nothing' again or else I'm going to die or worse!

[Author: "He really is testing my limit?! how dare you call me nothing!! Hehe I'll give you sexual impotence if you don't continue the story! or I'll make you a Girl and shoot a world full of FUTAS MUHAHAHA!" ]

"Holy Entity, don't do that Please! I'll continue right now but don't let me impose or throw me into a futas world!" Holy shit this entity really is dangerous! I'm going to continue right now otherwise I might start praying for the future me!

[Author: "Hump, really good otherwise you can start praying because the futas would not have forgiveness or oil. well, now that it's over continue where you left off talking. don't bother with me." I really thought that today was going to send someone to a world of futanari hahaha it would be funny for the guy to run from all the inhabitants of the world]

You know that feeling of barely surviving and you're sweating profusely? Well I got that feeling too but this time it was like I narrowly dodged a bullet! I swear by any entity out there that I will not try to piss off the Director or 'Nothing' again or else I'm going to die or worse!

Taking a few minutes to calm my mind plus my seemingly nonexistent body? well let's continue where we left off...well, I lived peacefully for another 6 months out of the 3 before all this started but with VERY VERY VERY cautious in the 6 months that I saw, but apparently it was less intense in the previous 3 months. why? I don't know. really weird and dangerous. now at the end of my 9th month things got even more frantic, why? EVERY time I leave my apartment I have to look out into the street so that a Truck doesn't hit me seemingly out of nowhere! always every 20 minutes look at the top of the buildings for a steamroller to fall out of nowhere! My life is very difficult! Shit!

How could these events not call the attention of the "Japan Self Defense Forces (Jieitai)" or even the Japanese Government?! Fuck even media doesn't show anything! even people don't find it strange! Damn there was one time someone got hurt and they just thought it was strange that he got hurt out of nowhere! Very strange! there's no way to ask for help because it doesn't even work, I've tried it, they just looked at me strangely when they said: "Did you drink or use strong drugs?" Damn it looks like nothing is wrong with that!

Now you ask me why I don't just leave Japan?! Because the fuck whenever I try to get out on a plane, boat, or whatever the fuck it always has mechanical failures or "mysteriously" breaks! Fuck whatever is holding me back in Japan with no intention of letting me out of the country! this is driving me crazy! but strangely nothing happens on saturdays or sundays, why? I don't know. but these two days are my eden that doesn't interfere with anything I want to do.

Now I'm enduring all this because I have a bold idea to say that when I complete 1 year all this will stop or so I hope.

BUT!

It never happens the way you want it to happen, why? simple my dear Watson! because remember how I said I died in a weird and embarrassing way? Good! this occurred when there were almost 4 days left for all this to end when I got hit by a fucking bicycle!! I survived with some bruises and a broken arm. but then as soon as i was going i put my feet in the street for a second i got run over by a fucking Ambulance! Lucky for me I was in the hospital! hahaha this time almost I REPEAT ALMOST went to 7 palms under the earth! Lucky for me the Doctors here are really very effective! So in all the months I survived more than Hundreds attacks on my life! Suck that Death and Fate!! Now heading home to spend the remaining days at home to not take any more risks and also to celebrate my victory against all this!! I'm really against death and fate together! I'll celebrate with everything I've got! HAHAHAHAHA!

[Author: "Didn't the poor man know that those last words cost him his life, poor man! Well who would be mad then throw those words in the face of death or fate or something else?! how could they let anyone laugh and celebrate at their expense!! Well they certainly don't accept it, Lo and behold, well see the moment and now! don't miss how he's going to die!"]

"Wait Wait, what did you say just now director?!" I started sweating and shaking all over my body when I saw what he said! my ass and body hardened and closed so much that it doesn't even pass WI-FI because I was so scared after seeing this!!

How could I die now?! I was in front of the door of my apartment with my hand on the doorknob to open the door!! The first thing that went through my mind was 'Run, run to safety!' how could why? well, as soon as i turned to run i was met with a big fist in the face! what kind of handle you ask me? well from an anime character that I only saw some parts in the videos on youtube! who?! Fucking DIO Brando! the fucking badass Vampire who has the best lines and villainous ways!!(apart from MADARA) in front of me, there he was! Blonde and with a well-defined body, he wears nice clothes and is very elegant! with his iconic clothes dressed in yellow pants and jacket, kneepads and heart-shaped tiara and earrings in his ears! There's no way to go wrong! It's him!!!! But why the fuck is he here or why did he punch me?!

(Dio Brando)

{"We'll see about that in the next chapter" don't miss out on Drago--! Ahem! See! In Relaxing after being superpowered in the Multiverse!}

{Thanks for reading!}