18 Dex

- DEX -

Leaving Montenegro with its beautiful vistas where I'm free to roam and take pictures and do whatever the hell I want was hard. When it's just me, my camera, and my motorcycle, I'm happy. That's all I really need.

Anything short of my father being sick couldn't have drawn me back to this city and the schedules and the formal suit and tie. Well, I'm still not going to wear a suit and tie like Lawson—that will never happen.

When I told my father as much, he only laughed. He knows that's how I am and that I'm not going to change. In fact, dad said something like, "The suit and tie don't make a CEO, Dex. The man does. But at least wear a suit when you meet with the board."

God, I respect and love that man so much. I have always looked up to him. When he called to tell me about his pancreatic cancer, I almost passed out. All I really remember is hanging up with him and then crouching in the corner of the small room where I was staying and sobbing until I threw up. Then I booked the next flight home.

I'm here for my father. If he wants me to run the company, I'm going to run the company.

Being chosen as the next CEO of Möbius Media wasn't at all what I expected, of course. Lawson has always been slotted to take over, which was perfectly fine with me. Lawson is the oldest. He's the son of my father's first wife. He is the most obvious… the most ideal in terms of his ambitions. But that was before I got home and learned more about what my brother has been up to these past four years.

Apparently Lawson has settled more than a few sexual harassment cases out of court. Dad wouldn't give me all the details, which worries me. I'm still trying to get ahold of the company's attorney so he can fill me in.

Dad seemed embarrassed to have covered for my brother and very reluctant to talk about it, even with me. And I can see why—my father is nothing like that. He's been married twice, but he's never been known to cheat. He values and respects women. He loved my mother dearly until she passed away, and he has been single ever since. And as much as I need to know what all Lawson has done, I'm not going to press dad for that information right now—not when he's undergoing these tests.

But covering for Lawson and not firing him immediately… God, I don't get it. I know dad loves him. But there's personal feelings and then there's what's best and what's right for the company.

I mean, I love Lawson, too. He's my only brother. We always joked about how he will never settle down—how it was always some new girl in school or some new woman when we graduated. I never thought any further into it—his love life is his love life. And I definitely never imagined he would do anything inappropriate. There's no excuse for that—no excuse good enough.

Even with my brother's ongoing therapy and his supposed solemn vow to never do anything like that again—it's not enough. How many times has Lawson fucked around and gotten away with it? If I had known, I would have told dad to fire him after the very first time it happened.

With all of this weighing on my mind when I walked into the building yesterday—dad's cancer and Lawson's bullshit and all of day-to-day business that I quickly need to catch up on—I was completely blindsided by the woman waiting with him in his office.

Auraya.

Everything about her is familiar. Her name, her face, her voice.

I've been a lot of places and met a lot of people, but I also have an excellent memory. And not being able to recall why this woman is familiar is driving me crazy. And then when we shook hands, it was like… it was like every tense, stressful thought that I walked in with vanished in an instant. And I can't stop thinking about it.

Last night, I actually convinced myself that Lawson had somehow found this woman from my past—some mysterious, elusive link—and was using her to sabotage our father's desire for me to take over. After all, I didn't ask for an assistant. I obviously know why Lawson doesn't have an assistant. But since I also know that my brother is not actually trying to help me—he still wants to be CEO, after all—Auraya has to be some kind of trick.

So prior to coming in this morning, I was determined to ignore her. I figured that if I could pretend she wasn't here and deny any use for her at all, then she would have no choice but to find something else in the office to do. I even called ahead and told Laurel that I didn't need anyone answering phones for me—that all calls should be forwarded to my cell.

But when I walked by Lawson's office and saw her sitting there again, looking just as vulnerable and unsure as she did yesterday—and with what was obviously Lawson's number scribbled on his business card—something fiercely protective flamed to life in my chest. It nearly stole my breath. The idea of my brother dating her, manipulating her, hurting her… I wanted to kick his teeth in. And then some.

Thankfully, I'm a master at hiding strong emotion. I was able to make a joke and usher Raya out of his office without anyone having to call security.

Ever since my mother died, strong emotions like that get bottled up. They get buried. I guess if I'm honest with myself, that's why I love traveling so much. Few personal attachments. Few reasons to feel too deeply for others. I can get lost in the scenery. I can view the world through a camera lens rather than engaging in the reality of it. Hell, I don't even dream anymore. A therapist like my brother's would probably eat that shit up.

And if this continues, I might just find myself in therapy. Because after I gave Lawson a thinly veiled threat to stay the hell away from every woman in this office or he was going to suffer very painful consequences, I came to my office with every intention of sticking to the original plan—of ignoring Raya.

And then she walked through the door.

I can't even remember why I was so intent on ignoring her anymore. I can't imagine why I would. I know her.

But I don't know her! What the fuck is wrong with me? Why is she so… so damn captivating? It's like the energy in the room entirely shifted, and all I was aware of was her… like those blue, innocent, vulnerable, unsure and yet entirely familiar eyes hold some kind of gravity.

Then when she squeezed those beautiful eyes shut like she was in pain, the protective instincts started firing again—ready to identify the threat and eliminate it. I offered to assist her headache with counter pressure. Counter pressure! What was I thinking? Did every single brain cell die the moment she walked through the door? Did this entire issue with my brother completely vacate my mind?

I mean, it's true… counter pressure does help. But that doesn't mean I offer it to the woman who has been assigned as my assistant! What was more alarming than that oversight, though, was how quickly she stopped me. I couldn't help but wonder what made her look so frightened.

Has she been hurt before? Did my fucking brother hurt her? I can't even allow myself to think about it, because these bottled emotions of mine are already starting to fizz to the surface. I just need to figure out what is causing me to react this way to Auraya, and then I'll be able to get control. I'll be able to think clearly again.

The thing is… other than the stupid suggestion about helping with her headache, it was like I actually was thinking more clearly when she was in here. I was relaxed. I was myself.

I've met thousands of beautiful women, and if this were just about Raya's looks, I could easily avoid her. But that's not it. It's like her presence and her voice have a euphoric effect. Once she started talking about Moxie's coffee, I didn't want her to stop. She is passionate and adorable, and she's probably talented, too.

It took everything in me not to actually tell her that rather than just saying she seems 'familiar.' She seems so much more than familiar. She seems like… home. She seems like a shelter from the storm. And because of that, I couldn't stop myself from stupidly smiling and chuckling like I had no fucking care in the world… like everything was perfect. Because that's how it felt in those moments when she was sitting across from me.

So, ignoring Raya failed. Instead, I gave her a raise. I told her to stay away from Lawson. I told her I have her back. I gave her an assignment and basically did everything short of guaranteeing her safety and security here at Möbius Media.

Thank God I got her out of the office for at least an hour so I can try to make sense of this. Or maybe I should just try to forget it and get some work done. Because I'm already finding myself anticipating her return… this woman that I just met. And there is nothing I need less than that kind of distraction right now.