BRANDON AND THE DEVIL

Brandon was a very wretched man. As he sat with his head bowed upon his

"Am I to understand," asked the stranger, "that you are prepared to enter

"But," he argued, "I must do something! My nine children are growing

fight, I am ready to sell my soul to the Devil!"

circumspect, and rigid; poverty has at last broken my spirit. I give up the

"Are you the Devil?" asked Brandon, eying the stranger critically.

looked up and beheld a grim visaged stranger in the chair beside him.

sulphur.

"The determination is a wise one," said a voice at Brandon's elbow. Brandon

"Yes," said Brandon, firmly; and he set his teeth together after the fashion

"Then I am ready to treat with you," said the stranger.

of a man who is not to be moved from his purpose.

stranger. "My name is Beelzebub, and I am my master's most trusted

have labored long and diligently," said he to himself, "and although I am

stopped and shivered.

am still a poor man, and shall probably continue so to the end of my days

unless"

up into big boys and girls. They must have those advantages which my

The stranger was arrayed all in black, and he exhaled a distinct odor of

"No, but I am authorized to enter into contracts for him," explained the

trouble, yet his soul revolted from taking that step. That was why he

desk that evening he made up his mind that his life had been a failure. "I

Here Brandon stopped and shivered. For a week or more he had been

brooding over his unhappy lot. There seemed to be but one way out of his

known throughout the city as an industrious and shrewd business man, I

limited means will not admit of! All my life so far has been pure,

into a league with the Devil?"

agent." "Sir," said Brandon, "you must pardon me (for I am loath to wound your

the Devil himself, would he treat. So he bade Beelzebub go to the Devil

prospect of "doing good" with the Devil's money! But Brandon failed to see

keeper's desk. You can understand, perhaps, that this is the Devil's busy

what the Devil was so jolly about. Brandon was not a humorist; he was, as

"To do good!" repeated the Devil. "To do good, indeed! Yes, it's many a

Monday is in a laundry, or asthe first of every month is at a book

Brandon, and ever and anon a malodorous, gummy tear would trickle down

feelings), but one of the rules governing my career as a business man has

cloven feet, and carried about with him as many suffocating smells as

"Yes," said Brandon; "it will give me every opportunity to do good."

middle-men. The affair now in hand is one concerning the Devil and

day; therefore be content to make this deal with me, and you will find

"As it so happens," explained Beelzebub, "this is Friday,commonly called

Brandon laughed uproariously. Nothing seemed more humorous than the

that my master will cheerfully accept any contract I may enter into as his

been to deal directly with principals, and never to trust to the offices of

there could be no mistake about it; for he wore a scarlet cloak, and had

myself,and between us two and by us two only can the preliminaries be

The two talked over all Brandon's miseries; the Devil sympathized with

hangman's day, and that is as busy a time in our particular locality as a

But no, Brandon would not agree to this; with the Devil himself, and only

and the contentment you crave."

the Devil's sinister nose and drop off on the carpet.

agent and in his behalf."

good time we shall have together, friend Daniel! Ha, ha, ha!" And the

and make known his wishes. Beelzebub departed, much chagrined.

"What you want is money," said the Devil. "That will give you the comfort

Presently back came the Devil, and surely it was the Devil this time,

there are kinds of brimstone, sulphur, and assafoetida.

adjusted."

we have indicated, a plain business man. It was finally agreed that Brandon should sell his soul to the Devil upon

quo."

"That is something I have never done before," suggested the Devil.

Surely a more horrible contract was never entered into!

business."

fourth year, Brandon's soul was to pass into the possession of the Devil,

must of course give a bond for the faithful execution of your part of this

receive certain rewards therefor--"

"Yes, your soul!" cried the Devil, gleefully rubbing his callous hands

diabolical treaty were set forth exactly.

a business man, can frame one sufficiently binding."

"And I prefer to do it myself," said Brandon.

Brandon faithfully, should provide him with riches, and should do

"You will have to sign your name to this contract," said the Devil,

"Why a lawyer?" queried Brandon. "A contract is a simple instrument; I, as

"That's so," said the Devil, "so let's get a lawyer to draw up the paper for

know the propriety and necessity of written contracts. And as for you, you

it is strictly and coldly business: you are to do certain service, and are to

"But I prefer to have a lawyer do it," urged the Devil.

When a business man once gets his mind set, not even an Archimedean

whatsoever he was commanded to do; then, at the end of the twenty

and was to remain there forever, without recourse or benefit of clergy.

condition that for the space of twenty-four years the Devil should serve

me to sign."

together. "Your soul in twenty-four years!"

"Certainly," replied Brandon. "I have been a business man long enough to

producing a sheet of asbestos paper upon which all the terms of the

"I shall insist upon it," said Brandon, firmly. "This is no affair of sentiment;

"Yes," said Brandon. "Now, no contract is good unless there is a quid pro

lever could stir it. So Brandon drew up the bond for the Devil to sign, and this bond specified that in case the Devil failed at any time during the

leagues straightway fell to frothing and to yowling grotesquely.

all right, I am rich. I 've got a lovely home; my wife is happy; my children

What better time could I demand?"

had leagued with the evil one. Brandonhad the finest house in the city, his

"But I am having a good time," said Brandon. "My business is going along

the bond which the Devil held against Brandon become null and void, and

abominable treaty, and every black cat within a radius of a hundred

he deported himself modestly and kindly; he pursued with all his old-time

Why not have a good time, Brandon?"

suspicion that you have it in your power to enjoy every pleasure of

are healthy and contented; I am respected,--what more could I ask?

riches. His indifference to the pleasures which money put within his reach

you avail yourself of the advantages at your command?"

from the Devil's dominion. The Devil winced; he hated to sign this

wife dressed magnificently, and his children enjoyed every luxury wealth

"I know what you 're driving at," said Brandon, shrewdly, "Politics!"

served Brandon so artfully that no person on earth suspected that Brandon

Presently Brandon began to prosper; the Devil was a faithful slave, and he

agreement, but he had to. An awful clap of thunder ratified the

was passing strange, and it caused the Devil vast uneasiness.

the fun there is in it. You go poking along in the same old rut with never a

could provide. Still, Brandon was content to be known as a business man;

next twenty-four years to do whatso Brandon commanded him, then should

time is that which makes the heart merry and keeps the soul youthful and

upon that same day should a thousand and one souls be released forever

"Brandon," said the Devil, one day, "you're not getting out of this thing all

"No, not at all," demonstrated the Devil. "What I mean is fun,--gayety.

buoyant, wine, Brandon! Wine and the theatre and pretty girls and fast

diligence the trade which in earlier days he had found so unproductive of

"You don't understand me," explained the Devil. "What I mean by a good

human life. Why don't you break away from the old restraints? Why don't

horses and all that sort of happy, joyful life! "Tut, tut, tut!" cried Brandon; "no more of that, sir! I sowed my wild oats in

dissipation. All you who have made a study of the business man will agree

"But the bond you gave is operative," continued Brandon. "So release the

"What!" shrieked the Devil. And the Devil's tail stiffened up like a sore

The Devil frothed at his mouth, and blue fire issued from his ears and

"Yes," said Brandon, "I want to be known far and wide. You must build a

So not even the Devil himself could persuade Brandon into a life of

thumb.

"I won't do it!" roared the Devil. "Do you suppose I'm going to spend my

"Then the bond I gave is null and void," said Brandon.

"Take your old bond," said the Devil, petulantly.

college. What right have I to think of such silly follies,I, at forty years of

thousand and one souls you owe me when you refuse to obey me."

gratifying your idle whims? I won't do it, never!"

"Yes," said Brandon, calmly; "you must build a church for me, and it must

methods. The Devil groaned and began to wonder why he had ever tied

nostrils. He was the maddest devil ever seen on earth.

always been good to you? Haven't I given you riches and prosperity?

Devil, with a sigh of relief, "at last."

church for me."

time building churches and stultifying myself just for the sake of

Pretty soon Brandon developed an ambition. He wanted reputation, and he

be the largestand the handsomest church in the city. The sittings shall be

told the Devil so. The Devil's eyes sparkled. "At last," murmured the

free, and you shall provide the funds for its support forever."

that of all human beings he is the hardest to swerve from conservative

up to a man like Brandon, a business man.

age, and a business man too?"

"Oh, Brandon!" whimpered the Devil, "how can you treat me so? Haven't I

Does no sentiment of friendship" "Hush," said Brandon, interrupting him. "I have already told you a thousand

somewhat of the violence of his nature. On this particular morning he

of the Devil, wherein he inveighed most bitterly against that person and

character. Then he made him secure the election of honest men to office

eventually I shall fulfil mine. Come, now, to business! Will you or will you

in righteous causes had chastened him to a degree and purged away

ailing. Of course our business relations do not contemplate any

build the church, and a noble one it was too. Then he endowed the

sanitarium, I can do nothing further than express my regret that you are

He had grown to be a very meek and courteous devil; steady employment

By and by Brandon made the Devil endow and build a number of hospitals,

bond and give up those one thousand and one souls. By this time Brandon

came to be known far and wide for his philanthropy and his piety. This

first things he did was to preach a series of sermons upon the personality

looked haggard and ill, yes, and he looked, too, as blue as a whetstone.

another. It now behooves you to fulfil your part of our compact;

charity schools, free baths, libraries, and other institutions of similar

"Have you anything for me to do today?" asked the Devil, one morning.

church, and finally he built a parsonage; altogether it was a stupendous

times that our relations were simply those of one business man with

his work.

work, and Brandon got all the credit for it. The preacherwhom Brandon

and of upright judges to the bench. It almost broke the Devil's heart to do

he was a business man.

not keep your word and save your bond?"

it, but the Devil was prepared to do almost anything else than forfeit his

somewhat ill."

"I am sorry to hear it," said Brandon; "but as I am not conducting a

The Devil was sorely put to his trumps. But when it came to releasing a

"I am not feeling robust," explained the Devil. "To tell the truth, I am

thousand and one souls from hell,ah, that staggered him! He had to

installed in this magnificent temple was severely orthodox, and one of the

gratified him of course; but most of all he gloried in the circumstance that

interchange of sympathies; still I'll go easy with you to-day. You may go up to the house and look after the children; see that they don't smoke

we built some years ago!"

"Then you are prepared to forfeit your bond?" asked Brandon.

"That will hardly be to your interest," said Brandon, "since, as you well

sacrifice."

insane errands my personal business has gone to the dogs I wouldn't be

recollect, most of our judges are members in good standing of the church

The Devil howled with rage. Then, presently, he began to whimper.

Now that was fine business for the Devil to be in; but how could the Devil

the humiliating task.

sentiment does not enter into this affair at all. We are simply two

would be necessitated. While I have been running around doing your

keep mine. Let me see, I still have a margin of thirteen years."

my reputation has suffered; I am no longer respected, and the number of

connection with you a permanent suspension of my interests down yonder

that he was n't going to work for him any more.

"You have ruined my business," said the Devil, wearily. "A committee of

the courts."

my recruits is daily becoming smaller. I give up, I can make no further

are exactly defined in the bonds we hold. You keep your contract and I'll

imps waited upon me last night and told me that unless I severed my

"Not by any means," replied the Devil. "I propose to throw the matter into

know, we have recently elected honest men to the bench, and, as I

The crash came at last. It was when the Devil informed Brandon one day

The Devil groaned and writhed.

"For the last time," expostulated Brandon, "let me remind you that

at all surprised if I were to have to get a new plant altogether. Meanwhile

business parties cooeperating in a business scheme. Our respective duties

cigarettes, or quarrel, or tease the cat, or do anything out of the way."

help himself? He was wholly at Brandon's mercy. He went groaning about

"They call me a dude," whimpered the Devil.

"Who do?" asked Brandon.

"I sha'n't I won't!" yelled the Devil.

with you, and may I be consumed by my own fires if ever again I have

"Do you really expect me to do _that_?" roared the Devil. "Do you fancy

"I don't know anything about that," said Brandon; "I am a business man,

and by this business arrangement of ours it is explicitly stipulated"

"Well, I do," insisted the Devil. "You've humiliated me so that I hain't got

"Well," said Brandon, "I have a very distinct suspicion that when, thirteen

a sedentary life."

muttered. "I'll make it hot for you!"

important work for you. Tomorrow is Sunday; you are to see that all the

The upshot of it all was that the Devil forfeitedhis bond, and by this act

flavor, and now I smell like spikenard and myrrh."

The Devil plucked up at this suggestion. "Indeed you shall not," he

"I don't care what the stipulations are!" shrieked the Devil. "I'm through

that I am so arrant a fool as to shut off the very feeders whereby my

hungry hell is supplied? That would be suicidal!"

"But come, we waste time," said Brandon. "I am a man of business, and I

cannot fritter away the precious moments parleying with you. I have

saloons are kept closed."

anything to do with a business man!"

"Pooh!" said Brandon.

doing pious errands so long that I've lost all my sulphur and brimstone

any more ambition. Yes, Brandon, you've worked me shamefully hard!"

"Beelzebub and the rest," said the Devil. "I have been trotting around

years hence, I fall into your hands I shall not enjoy what might be called

"But you must," said Brandon, firmly.

Daniel was released from every obligation unto the Devil, and one thousand and one souls were ransomed from the torture of the internal fires.