14 The buff guy. Wait, who?

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Diary Entry - A buff guy's account of his search for something magical.

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#Day 1#

- So cool! A new person appeered in my favorit anime. He went *BANG* and *WHACK* and *ZOOM* and *POW*on all the bad guys and disappeered! The hero was too weak to beat the bad guys up and I really thought that the hero was gonna be the one that got *BANG* and *WHACK* but luckly the new person saved him.

I wanna be like him! -

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#Day 2#

- I ran a lot in the park earlier. I can feel my feet getting faster alredy! Like the new person! -

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#Day 10#

- I triped today. My mom won't let me run for a few days so I watched my favorit anime. The hero is also doing training like me. I haven't seen the new person again. I guess he must be shy?

I watched the hero do a bunch of training even thow I don't like him anymore. The hero got stronger and showed a new move that went *BOOM* and made him cool again, but not as cool as the new person.

Im gonna copy the hero training. I can't run yet and all the hero did was lift hevy things and swing a sword so I can do that. -

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#Day 32#

- Going *ZOOM* like the new person is still too hard but I am faster now. I can also lift hevy things like a big branch now. -

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#Day 73#

- I found a place where I can train on my own wher other kids won't bother me. They keep trying to race me. I can beat them but that would expose my power. The new person also keeps his power hiden so I do the same.

"Strengt is not power itself, but how you weeld it." So cool! He said that after doing a strong techniq from somthing called "martial arts". Im gonna learn that too so I can say what the new person said. -

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#Day 187#

- My favorite anime ended. The new person never apeared again but he kept controling the story while hiding from evryone else.

The demon king was defeated. The hero got married to the princess.

I still don't know what the new person's name is. -

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#Day 443#

- While heading to my training place, some random ossan said he had candy back in his van. I used the hero's super punch on him and ran away to the nearest old person, just like my mom told me to.

They called the police. The police catched the ossan easily since he couldn't run away. I hit him where it hurts most. That's proably why he was walking weird.

I should know, I accidentally hit myself there while swinging the biggest branch while training. I am more careful now.

My training is working. I can beat random ossans. -

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#Day 1991#

- No one in my school suspects a thing. They must think that I'm just Mediocre Mob Character A but they couldn't be more wrong. All thanks to my superb acting skills of course.

My training has progressed well enough that I am confident with beating 10 of my school's most notorious bullies at the same time.

Also, for some reason my parents made me learn the piano. What a massive waste of my training time! -

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#Day 1994#

- I was wrong. Forgive my previous misgivings and ignore my foolish past self. I now understand the significance of learning such an elegant instrument. Parents do indeed know what's best for their children. -

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#Day 3813#

- No matter how many martial arts I master, nightmares would still haunt me of my quick demise. I may be capable of things most humans cannot, but escaping my mortality is beyond me.

Beating a person is easy, beating ten wouldn't make me drop a sweat, but a hundred? A thousand? What about a person with a loaded gun or a team of Special Forces armed to the teeth?

What about a nuke?

It's the simple truth. Overwhelming power is beyond me. I've reached the limit of what humans are capable of.

I need something else. Until it finally hit me. In that anime I used to watch as a kid, the hero, the demon king, the 'new person'... they used magic. A supernatural power. Through it, they brought about the overwhelming power that I keep chasing.

But it doesn't exist in this world. At least, no one knows if it exists.

But that's enough for me.

While magic's existence cannot be proven, the lack of magic also cannot be confirmed. If it did exist out there, then I only need to look.

That is what I need. That is what I must find. -

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#Day 3849#

- A dead-end. I should've known. A quick search on the internet confirmed that the magician was indeed only using tricks. The magician had some bad reviews while debunking videos were practically everywhere.

Now that I am writing this, what else can I possibly expect from a magic show? No one with real magic would simply use it for the entertainment of people. Watching that green-haired magician was a waste of time.

It made my heart ache, knowing that another day would pass while I remain incapable of going past my biological limits.

To think that I practiced all those martial arts, endured grueling physical training, and got as buff as a gorilla only to realize that it isn't enough.

That I am still too weak. That a single pull of a trigger can send me to my death.

At least I saved some money by not going again.

So I must prepare for tomorrow onwards my search shall continue beyond my prefecture, somewhere with fewer people to disrupt my training like the mountains of Oshimai.

If luck is with me, there is a chance that I would come across a hermit with knowledge about magic, mana, qi, or even psychic powers. They might even take me as a disciple if I showed them my devotion, but they must never know my true goal.

That would be quite embarrassing... -

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#Day 3850#

- I used most of my savings to buy several guides on how to survive in the wilderness and memorized all of them last night. Of course, I re-read them again during the flight to Oshimai so that I won't unexpectedly die without having my questions answered.

I brought nothing else but the school uniform I'm already wearing, this continuation diary, a book full of knowledge about supernatural powers (from the internet and other sources), and a pen known for the amount of ink it contains. No food, no water, no other kinds of supplies.

There is a reason for this of course, and that is to make myself more attuned to nature which will hopefully grant me some kind of special power. Also, by doing my training while living such a lifestyle, I expect that I would receive nature's favor. Like those elves from a fantasy story.

Once I am done familiarizing myself will I finally start my grueling mind and spiritual training. -

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#Day 3853#

- While wandering around the place, I found a waterfall. It's the perfect place to go while carrying out zazen.

Hopefully, when I do start meditation, these damn earthquakes wouldn't disturb me. They've been a bother, ruining a lot of the tents I made.

Maybe it was a mistake to come here. There were earthquakes back where I previously lived, but not as strong as the ones in Oshimai.

...They can't possibly be connected, right? They are simply too far away to be caused by the same natural disaster, right? -

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'I'm bored as hell.'

I stared at Owari Mountain, the largest mountain around these parts. Although the biggest, it wasn't tall enough to have snow caps on its tip, revealing its bare summit. It might also be because it isn't a cold season yet.

All in all, everyone else would see it as a very ordinary mountain.

But when I look at it, I see something else.

'The future end of a series.'

While leaning on the rooftop railing, I unwittingly sniffed the air, only to hurriedly pinch my nose.

"God, it just keeps stinking around here!"

It didn't come from me or human pollution. More specifically, the volcano known as Owari Mountain constantly released this silent but deadly smell of sulfur.

No one else has my sense of smell. On the off chance that someone did, they should hopefully figure out that this smell is because Owari Mountain is about to explode.

You know, Sulfur Dioxide. According to the internet, they come out when magma is near the surface, making the area stink. I followed the smell and found a bunch of lava, so it must be true.

Even if someone with my sense of smell didn't figure out that much, the smell is bad enough to drive any person away from the danger zone.

Since the eruption date was coming closer, the smell naturally intensified.

The thing is, I could smell it even from the Saiki household so I've been suffering. Even wearing a mask or making my senses as weak as possible wasn't enough to block my ridiculous sense of smell.

Personally dealing with the volcano and hence the smell shouldn't be too hard, it is just a volcano after all, but since it marks the end of the Saiki K series, I'll let its characters handle it.

'I'm not being lazy at all.'

I sang a song to pass the time. Not too loud, but not too soft either.

A bird flew through the sky before backtracking and perching near me. It landed on the railing I leaned on.

When it was comfortable, the bird let off little chirps.

"Shhh, I don't take song requests."

What should have been high-pitched chirps entered my ears as intelligible words. I understood the little thing, all thanks to Telepathy. It lets me talk to animals, among other things. Telepathy isn't always on, mostly because of that "among other things" part.

The bird chirped in response.

"Never heard of it. I have no idea how the song goes. Obviously, I can't sing something I know nothing about."

Singing in the form of chirps left its little beak.

I looked at the bird, dumbfounded by the lyrics.

"You have a crap taste for music, for a bird, that is. That song shouldn't be something a bird like you should know. You can leave if you don't wanna listen to my singing."

But it remained perched. It chirped no more.

Seeing the bird, now quiet, I looked back to Owari Mountain and resumed singing.

More birds within earshot similarly perched on the rooftop railing. They chirped loudly at first, barraging me with a series of song requests, but the little bird from before seemed to scold them with a barrage of unamused chirps. Quiet would return soon after.

Only my voice remained, echoing throughout the vacant rooftop.

My little animal audience bobbed their heads up and down with their eyes closed, clearly relaxed. Seeing them appreciate my singing, I happily continued with plenty of enthusiasm to spare.

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♩ We drank down our paints and the colors of the rainbow changed;

We began to wish to be held and stopped being able to walk on our own... ♪

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They were vibing to none other than "Munou"— the same song that caused quite a disturbance in the past. Comparing the scene from before to the one now, no one would think that they were both because of the same thing.

A Tokyo Ghoul opening.

'Nice. There were no spontaneous, delirious outbursts. Instead, they were vibing pretty nicely. I consider this a complete success. Time to move on to human experimentation...'

But the peaceful scene didn't last long.

In the open space behind me, although the sun was high in the sky, darkness began to materialize, forming dark and purple swirls.

From the corner of my eye, a young, lone figure emerged from within it.

"So you really were here. Snow, I've come to pick you up. The other members are already here. Let's go!"

Kaido beckoned me to pass through his portal.

Before I could step forward, an army of angry birds suddenly swarmed Kaido. The birds squawked as they pecked his clothes and ruffled Kaido's hair. Or at least, they tried to.

"Man, what did I do to you guys?" It's simple. You disturbed their vibing session.

A dark barrier protected him against the birds' sudden aggression, rendering their attempts useless. Kaido didn't bother fighting back; they were just birds after all.

Kaidou only stood there with a questioning look on his face.

'Heh... he really mellowed out compared to when we first met.' I thought to myself while watching Kaidou scratch his head in confusion.

Even if Kaidou technically isn't a chuunibyou since he has powers, he was still... delusional.

Whenever I was with him, all that talk about "ominous winds" and "the end is nigh" just kept going and going. Ok, maybe the "the end is nigh" part is technically true with the whole volcanic eruption, but it's not the best response to "Do you want some coffee jelly?".

Apart from that, Kaidou is a nice guy. He even brought me different kinds of sweets one time. As a thank you, I gave him one of my winning scratch-its as thanks.

Remember that 10,000 Yen I found? Now it's 10,000x that amount, all with a bit of luck and a System. I could've gone further, but it wasn't really necessary.

I gave half of it to Saiki's parents, as reparation for all the expenses I've caused. Saiki only got a little bit, maybe around 100,000 Yen.

I don't know how much Kaidou got from the scratch-it. It should be high enough.

Without waiting for Kaidou, I strolled into the dark portal before being met with a furnished room. I recognized the layout straight away.

It was structured similarly to a hotel room with two beds. Probably because it was a hotel room with two beds.

There were already three people inside, two guys and a girl.

{Let's get started. Where is Kaidou?}

Saiki spoke after seeing me. He was one of the people already here.

I looked at the other two; they were undoubtedly high schoolers.

Their identities weren't that hard to guess.

"I'm here. Something came up—Woah! There's something on your shoulder!"

After coming out of the portal, Kaidou pointed to my side.

I looked over, and there was indeed something.

Resting on my shoulder was the same little bird from before. When did you get here?

These days my hood is always up, restricting my peripheral vision, which is why I didn't see it. What can I say, it makes me feel cool and edgy.

'Yeah. Something like that.'

My hand reached for the bird, yet it stayed still. Even while trapped within my grip, the bird remained pretty chill.

I held it in front of my face, its soft feathers cuddling my skin. It began to chirp eagerly. If I wasn't squeezing it, then the bird would've surely flapped its wings as well.

The bird's chirps turned into words I could understand.

"Are you serious?"

The bird vigorously nodded.

"No. I don't take in underlings."

I pointed to Saiki before speaking.

"You see that guy? He's a good singer too. He can teach you all about the arts of singing."

The bird only took a glance before shaking its head. It was adamant about having me as its teacher.

"..."

Seeing my silence, the bird tweeted, this time at a much lower volume, as if afraid that the others would hear. Not like they can understand birds anyway.

"Pfft— For real?"

Isn't that interesting. Someone wants to get laid. Through mating calls I presume?

Unfortunately, I can't help you, young man. You asked the wrong person. I haven't talked to girls in years, much less sing for them.

I walked to the portal before shoving the bird into the other side. The bird disappeared beyond the churning darkness, but it was definitely back on the rooftop we were in before.

"Good luck with your love life, alright?"

Without telling Kaidou to close the portal, I forcefully began dismissing it. Purple pulses appeared from its edges, flowing from the portal's borders to its center, right where my hand pierced it.

With a slight tug, the portal followed, stretching like rubber before amassing into a dark sphere. True to its name, the sphere created from Black Beat throbbed in an entrancing, rhythmic manner.

I threw it to Kaidou, which he smoothly caught.

"...I still can't get used to her doing that. Can't believe she has my powers too."

Kaidou muttered as he reabsorbed the sphere. One of the 'strangers' spoke from the other side of the room while sitting on a bed.

"The newbie is pretty interesting~"

It was the girl. She fiddled with a heavily-decorated crystal ball in her hand, the kind used for fortune-telling. Meeting her eyes, she carried on speaking excitedly.

"I'm Aiura Mikoto by the way. Nice to see that our psychic group is growing~!"

I only need three words to describe Aiura.

Big-breasted gyaru.

That is all.

I wasn't staring or anything. In fact, someone else was.

"Ehehehe. They got bigger..."

Aiura noticed it and threw her crystal ball at the person gawking from across the room. He couldn't dodge the sudden attack since he was too distracted from staring too intensely.

"Ehehe—Urk! That hurt!"

"That's the point, you pervert!"

Aiura angrily retorted, but her face showed a vicious expression. It only deepened as the pervert dropped to the floor, clutching their stomach in agony.

"Ah, right. The nasty pervert on the floor is Toritsuka Reita. That's everything you need to know about him."

Toritsuka wore a white headband that surrounded his spiky, violet hair. Apart from his casual clothing, some kind of red beads hung around his neck and right wrist.

Aiura approached her crystal ball on the ground before picking it up. She tucked her wild, blonde hair behind her ear as she crouched down before fiddling with the crystal-clear sphere, muttering,

"Nice. No scratches."

'If you didn't want scratches on the crystal ball, why did you throw it in the first place?!'

Aiura didn't notice the look I sent her. Instead, she instantly crossed the distance between us after putting away her crystal cannonball.

Tightly squeezing my shoulders, Aiura spoke in a concerned, cautioning tone while eyeing the perv.

"He's the enemy of all women. Never let your guard when he's around, or he might do something weird."

Her eyes then fell on me.

Even without the close proximity, something mystical flared from within her lime-green eyes, almost as if she could see through my inner workings.

Almost.

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[Notice]

[The System has detected the use of PSI-related skills from the identified individual, Aiura Mikoto]

[Allow the individual to affect you, the host?]

<Yes/No>

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PSI-related skills? I thought that was something unique to Saiki. Is it because Aiura's power has a psychic basis? Then is Kaidou not a psychic, because Black Beat wasn't registered as PSI-related?

What is he, a magician or sorcerer of some kind? Then too bad. This universe is for psychics only buddy.

I mentally told the System <No>.

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"Got it?"

Aiura asked for my affirmation.

"I'll be careful around him then..." Toritsuka truly is horniness personified, so it would be best not to get caught up in his perverted shenanigans. Not when I'm on his hit list.

Hearing my words, Aiura flashed a wide grin and struck a reliable pose.

"Don't worry! As my kouhai, I will naturally protect you from this vulgar demon!"

"Ugh... don't listen to her... I'm from a temple damn it... how can I be a vulgar demon..."

Toritsuka Reita responded with tremendous difficulty. He spent his remaining energy calling for help.

"Saiki... help me... I'm going to turn into a ghost at this rate..."

{No you won't.}

"Ugh."

"..."

I think he passed out. Human bodies are so fragile, even more so than Aiura's crystal ball.

...I'll leave him chilling right there. Now that I'm a girl, Toritsuka will be 99.9% guaranteed to try to get in my pants. I'd rather not have to deal with that.

...I did check if he really was dying. He isn't.

"Well then! Let's start the Psychic Quartet Meeting!"

Aiura enthusiastically announced the start of the meeting.

...Even if I couldn't care less about the pervert, is everyone else seriously going to ignore the passed-out guy on the floor?

Oh, never mind. Kaidou put him on a vacant bed. He even put a blanket over Toritsuka to keep him warm.

Good boy Kaido to the rescue!

"Ah–! I meant the Psychic Quintet Meeting since we have a newcomer joining us. Err, your name is Snow White... right?"

Aiura didn't even spare a glance when Kaidou was doing his thing.

Yep, we're starting without Toritsuka. We might as well change the name back to the Psychic Quartet Meeting without him around.

"I guess I am."

"We've heard so, so little about you! Tell us everything because Saiki wouldn't!"

"Saiki talked about me?"

I'm a bit surprised, but it also kind of makes sense. Who wouldn't talk about an 'alien' currently living in your home to your little gang of psychics? I totally would.

"Well, not really. Kaidou was acting all constipated during school so I just pestered him a bit until he let out. I tried to do the same to Saiki to get to know more, but he wouldn't budge."

"I–I–I w–wasn't acting l–like I was c–constipated!" Kaidou tried to defend himself, but it wasn't convincing when he was stuttering. I could even see him shake. It was definitely not because of an earthquake.

The hotel room was also well insulated, so it shouldn't be because of the cold...

"You see what I mean? Just like that, but worse!"

"I wasn't!"

Kaidou is too easy to bully, with or without powers.

Don't worry, I gotchu bro.

"Ehem—! let's see... well, first off, I like sweets. I also like my powers..."

I cleared my throat to subvert their attention and as preparation. I also took the opportunity to ask the System to make a power list to read off. Glad to say that my powers are growing!

Let's see...

"I have a lot so bear with me. They are: LevitationPyrokinesisTeleportationPsychoBitClairvoyanceRestorationCryokinesisElectrokinesisApportInvisibiliyPetrificationPsychokinesisTelepathyX-rayMemoryAlterationBlackBeatUltimateDom-"

"Hold it!" Aiura stopped me from listing out more.

'That's not everything though...' I silently thought to myself. Maybe if I just said PSI then it would've been a lot faster, but then they wouldn't really get what PSI is.

"There's no way you actually have that many..."

Aiura looked at Saiki. Then she looked at me. She seems to have realized something.

"...forget that I said anything. But, this is a good thing! You'll be a massive help when the volcano starts erupting!"

"I'm not helping."

"Huh~?... Why?!?!"

"You shouldn't need it."

*Spoiler alert!*

With the Psychic Trio (trio because Kaidou isn't a psychic/magician/wizard in the canon), and Kusuke's big brain making plans (He has an IQ of 218), the volcanic eruption that would sink the whole of Japan was stopped.

Well, metaphorically sink Japan. It isn't that strong to sink the whole country like Atlantis, but damaging it beyond recognition, to the point of being uninhabitable, is what would happen.

So yeah, it sinks alright.

Previous attempts failed because Saiki lacked those two things. He would usually just come in and try to calm it down, to push back just as much as the volcano did. Of course, that never worked out.

In the end, all was daijoubu.

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Kaidou, who has been keeping their silence, also spoke up.

"From what I've heard, Saiki's been trying to stop it for years now—YEARS! And he couldn't do it!"

Naturally, no one believed me. But it doesn't matter.

'What was that saying again? Ah, right, "Seeing is believing." All they gotta do is go with the flow and see for themselves—'

"Snow, help us and I'll give you a hundred—no, a THOUSAND coffee jellies."

Kaidou's voice disturbed my thoughts, not because of his abrupt declaration but because of what they meant.

'I'm sorry, a what now?'

{...a thousand?} Saiki was also surprised. Imperceptible to the human eye, his knees went weak for a split second before straightening once more.

I looked at Kaidou and pondered.

'Did Kaidou rob a bank while no one was looking? Where else could he have gotten the balls to spend recklessly?! A thousand coffee jellies?! Seriously?! Even a smitten Kuniharu only bought a hundred or two at most!'

Well, Kaidou isn't the type to rob a bank... I think.

'But it doesn't change the fact that he suddenly has money for some reason.'

Kaidou, don't tell me... you sold your organs?!

[Initiating Omniscient Scan]

[...]

[Scan Complete]

[Found: No abnormalities]

[The individual known as Kaidou Shun is perfectly functional without complications.]

So that's not it.

.

"You heard me right! Four digits, enough to bathe in for days."

Haughtiness made its way onto Kaidou's face, resembling one particularly wealthy and conceited character.

'That snobbish facial expression... no way.'

I came to a possible conclusion.

'Did he get bought off by Saiko Metori? By that rich bastard?!'

A never-before-seen rich and powerful (in the psychic/magical sense) Kaidou has appeared. Yet another deviation from the canon storyline has come and made itself known.

However, it isn't enough.

'One thousand coffee jellies? Only a thousand? Did you really think that a mere thousand is enough to order me around?

My answer is simple.

"But I refuse."

"What! It didn't work?"

A thousand coffee jellies might move the drooling, pink-haired protagonist over there, but not me. Days upon days of binge eating have made me more resilient to such temptation.

"You underestimate me, Kaidou."

My voice was cold and aloof, carrying a hint of disappointment. Being bought off by Saiko... does the power of friendship not matter anymore?

"Where did you get the money from anyway?" I couldn't hold it in and got straight to the point.

"Eh? Didn't you give it to me?"

"I did?"

Kaidou nodded before saying, "From the scratch-it. You know, the one you gave me the other day after I gave you some sweets."

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"Right. That makes sense."

Flustered, I waved my hand, and like a paintbrush, it colored the world a striking dull. Soon, the room's colors changed, turning black, white, or in-between. Everything came to a standstill.

In the monochromatic world, no sound could be heard.

Only a loud ringing in my ears remained, but I ignored it. It was simply an effect of absolute calm: The sound of silence, if it had one.

After all, sound can be characterized by the vibration of an object, making the surrounding air or water vibrate as well.

How can I hear sound when time has stopped moving? I can't.

Nothing is vibrating since nothing can vibrate. Vibrations in the air are stuck in thin air, unable to reach my ears. As for the ringing in my ears, I've no clue as to why it exists.

'Oh, it stopped. Now, it's really, really quiet.'

Silently, I took a step forward. And another. And another, until I was back to the roof of the hotel. From here, I saw Owari Mountain, but it had lost quite a lot of its natural charm. Its vibrancy was no more but bland and, in my opinion, utterly dull.

'Maybe it's because it stinks 24/7 that I don't feel so good about it anymore.'

At least I can't smell anything in a time-stopped world.

Anyway, time for business.

"AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

"FFFUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCC—"

"THAT WAS SO EMBARRASSING!!!!!"

Mirrors didn't work in a time-stopped world, as even light became frozen, unable to be reflected. But if there is one, even in this Protogenoi-K-induced state, my face would surely be bright red.

"Stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid STUPID! How could I forget that I gave it to him?! My brain's supposed to be better than it was before but it forgot something like that!"

I shouldn't have been able to hear the sound of my voice, but for some reason, the words still came out loud and clear.

[Notice]

[At the time, 99.99% of the host's attention was preoccupied with eating the sweets offered by the entity known as Kaidou Shun]

[The host was not at fault]

"Haah... you could've told me beforehand. Why let me go through all that mental juggling for nothing?"

[The host did not ask]

[In this respect, the host was at fault]

"I call bullshit on that."

At least no one knows what was going through my head. This is all an internal thing. Everything is daijoubu.

But the burning in my cheeks didn't subside. Good thing I already know what to do.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHAAHHHHAAHHHAAAFFFFFAUUUUUU!!!"

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'Ah~ I feel better already~'

While eating a coffee jelly with a spoon from my inventory, I leisurely strolled back.

All it took was a little hand gesture to restore the flow of time once I was in the hotel room. Color returned where it should be, accompanied by Kaidou still trying to convince me.

"Don't try to change the topic. It's better if we all worked together to up our chances."

Kaidou hesitated but continued voicing his thoughts.

"I get that you aren't from this planet, so you might not care about the people here, but can you please do it for the coffee jelly industry?"

"What the— Snow is an alien?! Is that why she's covering her face and all?! To hide her alienness?!"

Hearing Kaidou's words, I released a cry of injustice.

"What the— I'm not that inconsiderate! I do care about humanity and its continued survival. When I said 'I wasn't helping,' I meant I would be back-up."

"Oh... that's good enough."

Since Kaidou seems to have chilled out, I shifted my gaze to Aiura, whose eyes shined like stars.

"And yes, I'm an alien, but I look completely human, lacking any of those stereotypical 'grey alien' qualities."

"Then you have nothing to hide, so show us already~ What other reason could there be?"

"Because I'm cute as fuck."

""...""

Soon, the amused cackling of two people filled the room. Saiki didn't join in, though he did wear an unreadable expression on his face.

I merely stood there, eating my coffee jelly. Once that ran out, I grabbed another from my inventory and continued chomping with little delay.

Oh, you might think, "But how can you eat coffee jelly while wearing a mask?! That's impossssssible!"

Take a sizeable chunk of the thing, teleport it into your mouth, and chew.

It's simple, really. I suggest this method when trying to conceal your appearance, as it is easy to do.

"AHAhahaha... haha... hah... sorry, I... we're not trying to be rude or anything... but it's just... heh..."

It's okay, Aiura. Don't rush it. Take a deep breath.

"We know someone pretty... it's hard to imagine anyone ever beating her in terms of looks. And her personality as well; Teruhashi might as well be a saint—no, an angel!"

The giddiness in Kaidou's voice was unmistakable, accompanied by a smile on his face.

"Teruhashi-san? Where?" Even the passed-out Toritsuka suddenly awoke and immediately began turning his head side-to-side, scouring the room for a trace of the person known as Teruhashi.

'Okay, I have no clue about how pretty Teruhashi is. I can't make a comparison between our appearances. It's not like I care about winning, but she is supposed to be extremely pretty; that makes me extremely curious.'

I'm a guy on the inside. I like pretty women, surprise, surprise.

As Teruhashi is this world's "Perfect, Pretty Girl," my expectations have never been higher.

I just decided. I'll meet Teruhashi and see for myself.

'Hmm... I could rank all the pretty people in the Omniverse... Nah, too much work.'

I'll take a look, appreciate their existence for a second or two, then skedaddle.

I shrugged.

"I'm not lying. You guys might pass out if you see me straight up."

"Do you mean from fear?"

"Fine, see for yourself."

In the blink of an eye, everything that covered my face vanished into the System inventory.

Without the mask, breathing became natural; the lack of eyewear made the world more vivid for a split second, but my eyes adjusted to normalcy just as fast.

Eyes fell on me, before they widened to an exaggerated degree.

It's time to finally answer the question: How pretty am I exactly?

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A/N: I'm gonna be gone for a month. By that I mean that I won't be writing for a month since I can't bring my laptop with me to my relatives. If I do post, it's because I used my phone to write which will UNDOUBTEDLY affect the quality of my work.

Eh, trying new things can't be that bad.