1 Happy Birthday Seagulls

Matthew Boberick stood with a handful of cherry pie looking at the horizon. The cherries dripped from his bare hand onto the wood of the pier.

Life in Ohio was great. He loved it here. The famous Ohio pier, the famous Ohio seagulls, and the even more famous Ohio slumbering Brad in a voice party.

One seagull crash landed onto the pier and broke its wing clean off. Matthew Boberick laughed and threw the cherry pie at the bird.

"Happy Birthday, you absolute buffoon!" he yelled as the crust and fruit made contact with the bird bleeding out before him. You Absolute Buffoon was a seagull that was born on the same day as Matthew Boberick. They were both 18 today. Matthew Boberick hoped that the seagull wouldn't use this as an opportunity to start a nicotine habit or gamble his savings away.

As Matthew Boberick kissed the dying bird right on the mouth as a goodbye, he turned to see a tall figure. Matthew Boberick was feeling so many emotions, but they couldn't be described. not a single one.

It was Mister Captain Naval McBoat.

"You know why I'm here." He said. Matthew Boberick did know.

He was here to marry him. Against his will.

But at least he was hot in the face area.