It's not your fault. I put a number on my days long ago.

[ TRIGGER WARNING: THOUGHTS OF SUICIDE, SELF-HARM, DEPRESSION, ANXIETY AND SELF HATE!!!!! WhOops I spilled my jar of angst again. I got inspiration from a fic on AO3 that I can't find anymore. If I find it then I will out the name/link in the comments - Insomniaddict 😓 ]

TRIGGER WARNING: THOUGHTS OF SUICIDE, SELF-HARM, DEPRESSION, ANXIETY AND SELF HATRED!!!!!

Shinsou and Izuku were.... friends. Shinsou thought Izuku was annoying and was counting the days until he could finally get away from him. He felt a lot of guilt for those thoughts but he ignored that. Shinsou may have thought Izuku was annoying sometimes, but he genuinely did enjoy his company he ignored this as well.

Izuku: "I am sure you'll make it into U.A., you are amazing after all Hitoshi."

Shinsou: "Mhm." he agreed absently.

He heard Izuku mumble something before they parted ways, but thought nothing of it. That was the last time Shinsou saw him. He made it into U.A. and Izuku went to some no name high school.

He got a call from Izuku on Sports Festival day. Shinsou was walking to the waiting room when he called so he missed the call. He checked his phone once he got there and saw the missed call. It had been 3 minutes since he missed Izuku's call. There was a voice mail.

'Hey. Congrats on getting to the 3rd round. Also for beating that guy. I am really proud!' Shinsou could hear wind. 'Uh, I guess I should get to the point of my message. I knew I annoyed you, but I didn't wanna be alone again. Uhm, well I don't want you to blame yourself for this-' The sound of wind got stronger and dread filled him. '-it isn't your fault. To be honest, I put a number on my days a long time ago. Ahaha.' Wet laughter sounded through the phone. 'I am sorry. Maybe if I tried a little harder things would be different. Uhm, bye.'

The voice mail ended and Shinsou texted Aizawa then immediately called Izuku. He picked up.

Izuku: "Hello?" He heard Izuku's voice come through the phone and he felt instant relief. Until he heard the wind again.

Shinsou: "I am sorry. I am so sorry. I was such a dick. Please don't do it." He didn't know how to handle this.

Izuku was silent for a second and all he could hear was the wind. Until he spoke up.

Izuku: "I can't handle this anymore. I am sorry Shinsou. I really do forgive you. Be a good hero for me okay?" The greenette's wet voice sounded through the phone.

Shinsou: "Izuku please. I am sorry, please don't do this. I- I-" He let out a sob. "I can't make what I did any better. I can't fix what happened to you but I promise to try to make your future better. Just please live." He begged, not knowing what to do at this point.

Izuku: "..." He was silent. "I'm sorry." The line went dead.

Aizawa couldn't get there in time. By the time he got there Izuku had already jumped. Aizawa reassured him it wasn't his fault but god did it feel like it was.

The funeral was just Izuku's mother and some blonde guy who looks around his age. Shinsou cried a lot during the funeral. Thinking about what Izuku said to him. In that moment he knew exactly what to do. Shinsou will become a hero for Izuku, he will be the best damn hero possible and change society. So no one else will have to go through what Izuku did.

[ Eyyyy I am bacckkkkk, wassuppp did you miss me? This isn't the best but I wanted to upload something. Kinda ended abruptly. I will upload whenever I can. I also wrote the 1st half of this in February so I have no idea what I was going for - Insomniaddict ]