2 Helgrey & Memories

"Ti… na," Dominic mumbles in his sleep, his tears dampening his pillow.

Knowing Dominic's having a nightmare, I sit up and shake him awake. After waking him from his bad dream, Dominic shot's up from his lying position.

"Don't go!" Dominic yells before taking a moment to breathe and gather himself. "Another nightmare?" he asks me.

"Yeah... you said Tina's name," I answered sadly.

"Thanks for waking me up," Dominic says gratefully.

"No need to thank me," I say before hugging him. "What are siblings for."

After the hug, both me and Dominic fell back asleep.

A phone alarm sounds...

Woken by my alarm, I feel the space beside me that Dominic once filled now vacant.

'Dominic must've had another nightmare and woken up early again.' I thought to myself as I clutched the empty space beside me. 'I hope he's alright.'

Still laying in bed, I focused my attention on the cardboard boxes by the bedroom door, hoping it'd take my mind off of Dominic. The boxes were all neatly arranged on the wooden floor, each one ready and packed for our move-over to Helgrey. My mattress, phone, and framed photo of my sister on the floor beside me were the only things left unpacked in my room. Reaching past my sister's picture, I grabbed my phone that was charging beside it.

7:15 am Wed, 28 Jan, my phone read; a few weeks since Tina's funeral. Putting my phone down, I look at my sister's picture, wishing she was still here. But like a nightmare, she never is. The pain of waking up and her not being there is worse than any cut or bruise. After looking at her picture, I take myself downstairs for breakfast. As I entered, a sense of melancholy loomed over the room.

"So… are you guy's… ok," Mum asks.

"Look... mum. Just read the mood." I say sadly; Mum went silent at my words.

"Rhi…" Dominic said with a sad expression.

We all ate quietly after that. When we'd finished and cleaned ourselves up, we all got into mum's silver Sedan, ready for the long road ahead. The trip to Helgrey was, as expected, long and tedious. But after ten or so long hours on the road, mum finally tells us we're almost there.

"Mum?" I ask.

"Yes, Rhi," mum answers with a faint smile.

Before I answered, I took a quick breath. "Mum, why do we have to move to Helgrey? Couldn't we have stayed where we were?"

The question caught mum a little off guard, prompting her to pull the car over to the side of the road. Mum looks me in the eyes through the rearview mirror from the driver's seat, quickly masking her sadness with a fake smile.

"Rhiannon, please, think of this as a new beginning. As a family." mum asks.

The way she spoke indicated she didn't want to talk about it, and her face begged me to leave it be even more so. I roll my eyes at her answer, replying with a hint of snide and sarcasm.

"Really? 'A new beginning; That's one way to put it. But running away from Tina's death isn't going to solve our problems." Everything went silent when I finished speaking.

To fill the dreaded silence, I pressed the side of my forehead against the car window and listened to the quiet vibrations of the car; it didn't work. The guilt just continued to wash over me as I looked out the window at the passing scenery, my outburst on replay in my mind.

I've always found it unfair; how the happiest memories, the ones you want to hold close and never let go of, are the easiest to forget. Well, the saddest memories, the ones you wish with all your heart would disappear, are the hardest to forget. But what happens when those happy memories are taken away from you and turned into nothing but a horrible reminder. A reminder that you'll never get those happy memories back; what then?

Looking out the window, I see grey clouds set in, the dark clouds bringing with them the rain. The rainy weather mocked me with its comedic timing as the droplets trickled onto the car windows, cooling my cheek and forehead. After fifteen minutes of awkward silence, I sigh, causing condensation to form on the window, watching as we drove past a worn-out wooden sign with the words ~Welcome To Helgrey~ painted on it in white, blurred by the rain.

As more grey clouds and rain blanketed the sky, I thought to myself, 'Helgrey, the name suits the place.'

Trying to take my mind off the argument, I let the pitter-patter of the light rain lull me into a daydream. I was about to doze off when Dominic nudged me with his elbow, whispering to me so that mum couldn't hear.

"Rhi, that wasn't cool. You went too far." Dominic says crossly in a hushed tone.

A look of grief flashed across his face as he recalled an unpleasant memory. I knew why his face filled with sorrow; he remembered our sister, Tina. Regaining his composure, he changed his tone and resumed talking.

"Mum's had it just as hard as the two of us. You know that," Dominic said, still quiet, as he gave me an annoyed look. "I know you, Rhi. You knew what you were gonna say was hurtful, but you chose to say it anyway."

I always hated it when Dominic said things like that; because he was always right.

"Nicky, your annoying, you know that," I whisper back at Dominic, smiling as I returned his nudge from earlier.

"What are siblings for," Dominic smirked before tilting and nodding his head toward's mum.

I looked at the rear-view mirror staring at mum, then looked down at my feet in shame. Taking the subtle hint from Dominic, I shyly let out an apology for everyone in the car to hear.

"Mum, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that I," I pause as my throat tightened with guilt, "I don't know what came over me."

Hearing my apology, mum pulls the car over, unbuckles her seatbelt, and smiles as she turns to face me. Stretching over from the driver's seat, she hugs Dominic and me, gently kissing our foreheads, then comforts me with her reassuring words.

"Honey, it's okay; you aren't wrong. What happened to Tina is one reason, but that's one of many. I hope you can understand." Mum said with a kind smile.

The rest of the car ride was silent, but it wasn't awkward anymore. We arrive at our new place of residence late in the afternoon. When I get out of the car, the light rain gently tickles my face. Following mum, she leads us to a stone staircase. The stone staircase weaved its way through the trees, leading to a large open front yard.

After taking a moment to admire the greenery that gently hugged the house, I breathed in the moist earthy air and continued making my way to the porch. As I walked down the path, I took the time to take in the warm feeling of the house. The homey wooden exterior and subtle modern touches of the house blended splendidly with the forest atmosphere. Walking into the cosy but modern-looking house, I went to pick myself a room.

There were two bedrooms upstairs and two bedrooms downstairs. Wanting to get a room with a view, I hurried upstairs. Finally, I found it. Walking inside, I sit on the double bed and leave the bag I brought with me on the floor. Sitting up on the soft bed, I looked around the rectangular room, imagining where all my belongings would go.

The bed I was seated on was positioned lengthwise on the left-centre side of the room. In the left corner of the room, next to the double bed, was a closet. Like the double bed, the closet faced to the right of the room. On the right side of the wall, opposite the bed, was a window seat and bookshelves that took up the entire wall.

After looking at the room, I went downstairs to get a snack. The leftover food from our pit-stops was in one of the bags mum was carrying. While looking thru the bags for snacks, I overhear mum on the phone receiving bad news.

"What!? The moving trucks with all our stuff crashed into a river. What happened? Are the employees okay?" Mum asked, concerned.

Given mum's reaction, the movers must've survived.

"Thank god they're alright," mum said with a sigh of relief. "Is there anything I can do to help?" Mum went on to ask.

According to how the conversation went, the people involved in the accident were rescued by nearby roadworker's, acquiring only minor injuries. It's too bad the same can't be said for our belongings now somewhere in a river.

"What a wonderful start to this - new beginning," I say with slight sarcasm, taking a bite out of my muesli bar.

"Please not now, Rhiannon," mum said, putting her hand over the phone, then removing it to continue speaking.

Following a more thorough discussion with the movers, both parties come to a decision. Mum decides to use the refund money to help pay for the medical expenses, and the moving company decides they'd send in new furniture as a reimbursement. All's well that ends well, I suppose.

When the phone call ends, mum drives us to the local stores to get blankets, sheets and groceries. When we got back home, I snuggled up in my new blankets and sheets, falling soundly asleep.

The next day...

Sometime mid-morning, a delivery man came knocking on our door.

"Is this the residence of Miss Sussanne Denzal Rayez," the man asked.

From my seat on the couch, I could see two men dressed in furniture and more uniforms.

"Yes, that would be me," mum replied.

"On behalf of Furniture and More, I'd like to thank you for your patronage. All I need now is your signature. Just sign here, please." The man said while gesturing to what looked like a tablet in his hands.

"Where would you like us to put the furniture." He asked after she finished signing.

"You can just put the furniture in the living room," mum tells the man.

"Of course." He replies with a nod.

After bringing in the furniture with help from his coworker, the man left in his big moving truck. After the two men left, the three of us started furnishing the house. As the day went on, I'd check on mum to see if she was alright, but she never was. I guess the same goes for Dominic and me as well. Nothing's ever been the same since Tina's death.

It's been a few weeks since the cops came knocking on our door, telling us they'd found Tina's body down a riverbank. But I remember it like it was yesterday. I remember the sound of those deafening police and ambulance sirens as they echoed in the distance. I remember Tina's slightly eaten arm, courtesy of the river life, drooping off the side of the gurney. And her lifeless body, cold to the touch, lying peacefully in a coffin.

But the worst of it all was the sense of despair I felt when I woke up every morning after, and Tina wasn't there anymore. She was just gone; I don't think anyone could get used to that feeling, not ever. We all grieved in our own way after Tina's death: mum silently cry's at night while looking at Tina's picture, Dominic has nightmares, and I, I shut people out.

The whole thing is a total shitfest. Thankfully All those unsavoury memories were interrupted by my brother's welcomed intrusion. Dominic and I are always there for each other when we need it most.

"Rhi, mum says dinner's ready," Dominic says.

With a slight smile on my face because of his timely interruption, I get up, move to the door and hug him. Shocked by the sudden embrace, Dominic looks at me as if I had gone insane.

"You're not sick, are you, Rhi? Is the world ending?" He asked, concerned. "You never just hug me like that," he said suspiciously.

With a grin on my face, I punch him right in the gut.

"Shut up, you idiot. I just wanted to hit you," I reply, a playful smile on my face.

"Now… that's the Rhi… I know…" Dominic stuttered, holding his lower belly in pain and propping himself up using the door frame.

After our little sibling fight, we walk downstairs to the dinner table together. During dinner, Dominic end's up embarrassing me.

"Hey mum, Rhi hu - " Before he could finish speaking, I kicked him under the table and threatened him with my fork.

"Mum, Rhi hugged me!" Dominic blurted out with a devilish grin before I could kick him again.

With a shocked look on her face, mum got herself together and smiled the biggest smile I'd seen - since ever.

"Rhiannon hugged you!?" mum exclaimed.

After mum said that, Dominic looked at me and flashed me that same devilish grin. Having put his plan in motion, he continued to get his revenge for the gut punch from earlier.

"Mum, you should ask for a hug too," he says innocently.

As mum came in for a hug, a look of horror flooded my face. Unable to refuse, I caved in and hugged mum while giving my brother a death stare, mouthing the words - Y-O-U - A-R-E - D-E-A-D - as I hugged her.

After that disgusting family bonding time - shivers ran down my spine just thinking about it - we continued to eat our dinner. When we finished eating, mum made an announcement.

"Rhiannon, Dominic, the both of you will start at Graysville High school on Monday, So be good," Mum said authoritatively.

"Got it, mum." Dominic and I replied as we went to bed.