Dark (4)/Chest: Other

I see you struggling with what's best to do things

You want to get out of yourself, forsake what you have inside, kill it until it does not exist anymore

But doing so, you will lose the things to drive you to keep breathing

You feel so down and casted out of the norm of how life should be lived at

The pain sometimes numb you

You feel like you don't have enough energy to continue living

Loving someone, making friends, caring for a lot of them and helping your family

These are getting inside you again

All the responsibilities you were not really forced to take, you keep holding on to it

That you concluded things and you would be an ingrateful being if you don't fulfill such

You are not yet allowed to go to the other side of the living because you haven't been doing your part as much as expected of you

Living and dying causes pain

Pain for you and pain for them

Drifting away would not suffice the dissatisfaction and hunger a human is born with and never really escaped

You were so much to most people you meet, you attached yourself to people you don't trust, to people you don't want to let go no matter how they suffer, to people you really wanted to be free

Free of you

You always have that hope but you never really believe in it

You believe hope is such a worse thing a person can cling to

It's like holding yourself together, believing one day, all of these shall pass and you will be okay

Okay is very overrated

I am fine is the worst

You don't know what you want

You keep dragging people around you to your own oblivion, to your own abyss, to your own misery and despair

This isn't like the anime "Danganropa"

You live in this reality you never really accepted

You were living like the rest of humanity, feeling every emotions, acting human when in fact you really are a beast in a form you wanted to become but never will

I'm too tired to hold you now

Be thankful you are still speaking with anyone

Cause trust me, if you will stop, you will cross

You will have the one thing you always sought but never really continue to complete

If you will stop, they will realize soon enough and it will be too late

No more physical body to hold and touch, nor voice to be heard and have a conversation to

I see you struggling

I'm looking at you, perplexed at the same time, if I should help you

You have rid of me once

Well, be grateful you did, or those around you would have suffered more than you

I don't feel as much as you

And 'tis a crime I am just looking at you

Trust me if I help you

You would wish you never extended your hand to accept me again

Drive you crazier than you are now

Messed up with everything, feeling useless and worthless yet trying to be not

I see you crawling, gasping for air you never really want to breathe

©️ 03.20.2020