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Being a God Sucked, so I Quit

He was bored. Really, really bored. It's been countless years since he ascended from the lower realms and became a god, abstaining from all mortal desires for cultivation. However, becoming an immortal was the worst decision he has ever made! Flirt? All the goddesses were either taken or chaste to the point of nunhood. Cultivate? He was already at the peak and there was nowhere left to go. "F*ck it, I'm out of this sh*thole." Yu Tian finally had enough and used his Qi to blow himself out of the Nine Heavens. Hence, a new life begins. Yu Tian wishes to enjoy it peacefully, but fate had other plans in store. When his lost memories and mysterious past catches up with him, will he still remember how to be... Human? Chapter updates are usually once every few days. If I gain more supporters, am willing to try to do one chapter a day. Maybe more than one chapter a day if I get enough support. (WARNING: THERE ARE SWEAR WORDS IN THIS BOOK) Special thanks for those who donated the most powerstones (Top 3): Pandarun Me 2shadowx Also a special thank you to everyone else who had voted and supported my book.

Helldragon_xd · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
32 Chs

[Bonus chapter]A Small Break Before the Tournament Climax

"Li Yu Tian is the winner." The elder announced.

Yu Tian breathed a sigh of relief. He was really tired from this battle with his cousin, taking a lot of damage compared to his fight with Li Gang.

Li Yaoyao finally regained consciousness. Opening her pretty eyes slowly, she realized she was in someone's arms.

"That was a great battle." The young girl looked up to see herself being cradled by Yu Tian, who looked down with a smirk. "Morning, sleepyhead."

"Ahh!" Pushing herself out of his arms in embarrassment, the young girl looked away miserably.

She was so close to winning. Being too tired clouded her judgment and caused Li Yaoyao to lower her guard. If she kept using her Qi to protect herself, perhaps the outcome would've been different.

Feeling a warm hand on her head, Li Yaoyao looked back up to see Yu Tian patting her. She pouted unhappily and couldn't help but blush.

She was taller than him by a head, so it was quite a strange picture to see Yu Tian reach above him to touch her head.

"You can stop that now." She walked off the stage in a huff and a stamp of her feet, causing Yu Tian to chuckle goodnaturedly.

Seeing the battle this time, his haters couldn't say anything aside from giving him dirty looks. Yu Tian noticed his mom was giving him a look of pride, so he gave a wink back and a thumbs up to let her know that he was okay.

Clearing his throat, Li You Zi stood up. "Since Yu Tian has just finished a tough battle, let's all take a rest for 1 shichen before continuing."

Seeing there were no objections, Yu Tian and the rest of the spectators dispersed for a break.

...

"Ah." Yu Tian sighed in comfort as he entered the cool spring. Cupping his hands, the former god took a huge drink of the refreshing liquid.

His burns still stung, so he opted not to wash with warm or hot water. He was glad that the Li clan's backyard had many beautiful bodies of water flowing through it, allowing him to relax and revitalize himself.

Leaving his new robes on the edge, Yu Tian began to wash away the ash and dirt from his battle. His old clothes were charred and in tatters thanks to Li Yaoyao's attacks.

Although his cousin was really cute, she was certainly also quite vicious.

He took a deep breath of fresh air, enjoying the calm nature that now surrounded him. It was peaceful and quiet, with a sense of freedom that Yu Tian yearns for. The former god couldn't wait to grow up and explore this land in his new life.

"Hm?" Yu Tian noticed someone's presence in the trees.

A boy about his age stepped out from the foliage, seemingly looking for something. They locked eyes and stared at each other calmly. Seeing that they were both boys, Yu Tian didn't mind that he was naked.

"Hello." Yu Tian greeted the other boy calmly. He noticed that they were dressed in the colours of brown and gold, meaning that they were from the Shan clan.

Shan Qian Xue could only stare as Yu Tian picked himself out of the spring, buck naked. Her attention was drawn to his small part under there, and she looked at it curiously.

"What's that thing?" Shan Qian Xue asked, pointing to Yu Tian's little brother.

"..."

Yu Tian slowly turned around, covering his privates. After hearing her voice and the question, he was now certain that the other party was in fact a girl.

"It's..." Yu Tian was now put between a rock and a hard place. "A secret."

He didn't know what to say to this tomgirl. This was way too awkward and words weren't coming to his head. On the positive side, the girl was about his age and still a child, so she doesn't know about the interactions between men and women.

Shan Qian Xue gave him a strange look when he stopped talking. She watched the boy quickly get dressed in his robes, causing them to get wet from not getting drying off all the water first.

Finally wearing clothes, Yu Tian felt much more comfortable now. He walked towards the boyish girl and put his hands on her shoulders. "It's a secret, so you can't tell anyone okay?"

Tilting her head, Shan Qian Xue gave him an inquisitive look. She didn't know what was so secretive about that thing in Yu Tian's lower regions. The young girl just didn't know what it was.

"Do you..." Shan Qian Xue licked her lips with a small tongue. "Have any potatoes?"

Yu Tian raised an eyebrow. This little girl was certainly weird, but he did remember finding some wild tubers in some areas nearby. "I can help you find some."

Her eyes slowly lit up, becoming so large that Yu Tian felt he could see stars in them. Shan Qian Xue began to drool in happiness, causing Yu Tian to take a step back. "Okay. I'll keep your secret then. Let's go!"

"What's your name?" Yu Tian asked as he led the way.

This girl was really strange, but he could also feel strong pulses of Qi coming from her. Yu Tian didn't know what her cultivation was, but it must be quite high for her age.

"Qian Xue. Shan Qian Xue." She replied, stretching her arms. "I know your name is Li Yu Tian, and that you're a level 6 Qi Novice."

"Oh." Yu Tian assumed she knew his name from watching the tournament.

It was strange though. This was because aside from the children in the Li clan, the other clans wouldn't send their younger generation to watch other clan tournaments. All of them should be training for some inter-clan competition or something like that.

"You'll be going against that Li Hao Ran in the finals." Shan Qian Xue remembered. "I think you should give up though."

Yu Tian looked back, amused. "Why do you say that?"

"Your opponent is already a Qi Warrior." Feeling indebted for Yu Tian's help in finding potatoes, Shan Qian Xue decided to give him honest advice.

Even without seeing a cultivator battle or use their Qi, her martial spirit allows her to sense the cultivation of others with a glance. Shan Qian Xue had long noticed Li Hao Ran having the highest cultivation in the tournament.

"With you only being about a mid level Qi Novice, you'll lose for sure." She warned him solemnly.

...

"Yu Tian?" Li Mei Ling was finally relieved after seeing her son. She also noticed that the little tomboy was behind him, seemingly overjoyed as they were both carrying something.

He had gone to wash up but hadn't returned for quite awhile. Li Mei Ling saw that although he was dressed in the new black robes she fetched for him, Yu Tian got them dirty and muddy already.

"Mother." Yu Tian greeted her warmly.

"Who is this little girl?" Li Mei Ling asked as she affectionately rubbed his head. She finally noticed the objects that they were carrying were several potatoes.

"This is Shan Qian Xue from the Shan clan." Yu Tian introduced his new friend.

About half of the shichen was already up, so there was still an hour left. Seeing how both of the children were hungry, Li Mei Ling took them to the kitchen and wash up the potatoes they brought.

The servants paid them no heed as they entered, although they gave a curious glance at the trio. Yu Tian helped his mother carry the potatoes to a large makeshift sink.

"Ohh." Shan Qian Xue watched with curious eyes as the mother and child began to clean the wild tubers.

Seeing how they worked, she began trying it herself as well. Being the young miss of the Shan clan, she always had servants fawning and taking care of her every need. This was something she had never experienced before.

After the potatoes were cleaned, Li Mei Ling showed them how to cook them to make them more delicious.

"First we need to boil them before roasting." Both children watched as she cut the potatoes into large chunks before adding them to a pot filled with water. Li Mei Ling then set the pot onto a hot stove. "This helps give it a beautiful crust on the outside and cleans it thoroughly."

"Stand back children." After the spuds were done boiling, Li Mei Ling dumped the water and quickly took the potatoes out so they wouldn't become mushy.

"You want the outside to be soft and the inside to still be firm and raw." Li Mei Ling explained and quickly dried them with a towel.

She then chopped them up once more before throwing everything into a wok pan. Adding a scoop of duck fat, Li Mei Ling bathed all of the chunks in lard before she began roasting.

"Wow." Shan Qian Xue began to drool as the delicious fragrance filled the kitchen.

Even Yu Tian couldn't help but gulp down a mouthful of saliva. Growing up, he preferred eating whatever his mother made him, rather than the usual fare provided by the servants that worked the kitchen.

Although Yu Tian knew his mother was an excellent cook, there was something else about her food that he couldn't explain. Anyone else can easily make what his mother made, yet the food that Li Mei Ling cooked for him would always be more delicious.

This was also something he had never experienced in his past life.

Li Mei Ling chopped and added a handful of finely sliced green onions, then a little bit of red pepper for spice. Sprinkling some salt and pepper, their afternoon snack was finally ready.

"Let's eat, everyone." Li Mei Ling giggled at the expressions of the two children. She filled 3 bowls with rice and placed the platter of roast potatoes between them.

Taking a bite, Shan Qian Xue was sent immediately to heaven.

It was crispy and crunchy on the outside, yet fluffy on the inside. Her tongue was being massaged by the wonderful medley of salt and spice, with a hint of tanginess from the red peppers. Mixed with the rice, it was a perfect combination for her taste buds.

Yu Tian had a similar expression on his face, enjoying the taste. Both children began to scarf down the rice and potatoes, while Li Mei Ling ate casually while observing them. She was amused at how adorable they were when eating.

"Click." Yu Tian and Shan Qian Xue's chopsticks met in a clash over the last chunk of potato.

Looking at each other, Yu Tian sighed and let her have it. It just wouldn't feel right to fight with a girl over food, even if she did rather look like a boy.

However, he felt that he was losing out a lot. Not only did she see his naked body, Yu Tian even helped her find potatoes so they could have this meal.

"Hehe." Shan Qian Xue happily chomped down the last chunk of the delicious potato. She rubbed her tummy in pleasure. "Thanks a lot, lady Li."

"No worries." Li Mei Ling smiled at the tomgirl's antics, rubbing her head. "Remember that the finals are about to start soon. Don't go off too far while playing."

...

"Qian Xue!" Shan Dong Hai called.

He couldn't find his granddaughter anywhere. The servant that was attending her had been tricked like usual, allowing her to escape when their attention was distracted.

"Young miss! Please come out." The servant was helpless as well.

Their family's young miss was not only talented in cultivation, but also very intelligent. It was unfortunate she used her talents for the wrong things, such as escaping from her attendants or stealing potatoes.

"Qian Xue!" Shan Dong Hai was stunned to see both Yu Tian and his granddaughter together. Both of them exited from a part of the Li clan's house, chatting about something.

"Oh. Grandpa." Shan Qian Xue finally noticed the old man and the servant.

"Where were you?" The Shan patriarch asked sternly.

Shrugging, Shan Qian Xue told them that they went to look for wild potatoes before eating them, causing both the old patriarch and the servant to have a headache. Seeing that his granddaughter was safe and sound though, Shan Dong Hai did not press on the issue.

"Patriarch Shan." Yu Tian greeted him politely.

He gave a curious look at Yu Tian, who calmly stared back. Clearing his throat, Shan Dong Hai nodded in approval at his etiquette.

"Are you ready for the finals?" The old man asked the boy.

Yu Tian grinned confidently. "Very ready."

Shan Qian Xue rolled her eyes. She already tried to warn this idiot out of fighting Li Hao Ran, but he wasn't listening. The young tomgirl just felt that Yu Tian was overconfident.

Chatting away on small talk, time quickly flowed past. Before they knew it, the shichen was up, and the finals were finally about to begin.

1. Shichen = 2 hours.

Next chapter should be out later today or tomorrow. Oh boy, it's going to be spicy with what I planned out.

Spoiler: Yu Tian will get pissed off. Very pissed off. ; )

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