Coming Out
From Kai's POV
"I already love someone else." That rang in my ear over and over again. Who is it? Am I not paying enough attention? When did it start? No. That doesn't even matter at this point.
"And what do you mean 'long distance relationship'?" She looks at me with a confused, saddened look. My eyes became blurry with tears. She's more than upset, isn't she? Now I'll definitely lose her... My whole body became numb at the thought. I'll fix this. She's in shock. I mean who wouldn't be? I don't even know why I did that in the first place. Kai, you idiot!
The silence was palpable and I felt obligated to break it up. I pretty much ramble the first words that came to mind. "It may come as a surprise to you. This confession and all, given that you thought I was gay. And you may even feel betrayed--" She shakes her head. "No. I'm the one who's been unfair to you." She took a deep breath, clearing her eyes for any possible tears. "I've been avoiding this as much as I can and I don't want to lead you on but-- It's just--" Al holds her breath. "There's something I've been hiding from you for a long time."
"I know your attractions for me ever since we were kids. I'm not numb." My brows creased. "What? Then why do you have to act like that? You knew I was not gay, but you still acted like I was one. Why?" I felt my voice rising. She opened her mouth but no sound came out.
"I know I've become selfish with how I treated you." She closed her eyes, collecting herself. "Damn right," I uttered. "I... I just don't want to lose my best friend. And my lover." Alicia just sighs as she looks away. A lover? Wow. It's like I'm talking to a whole new person.
"I never knew I'd meet someone whom I'll deeply connect with. Remember my 7th birthday? I hyped out everyone in our school because the Sugar Sweets band will be playing at my party. Everyone was there but all I could think about was how lucky I am because my favorite band will be there. But all came crumbling down when they canceled at the last minute." Tears started to form on her eyes but she wouldn't wipe it off this time.
"I bawled my eyes out that time until you took the stage and you played the most beautiful melody I've ever heard. There are over a hundred people in there but you still got up the stage anyway. Well, your legs shook the whole time but you held your own like a champ. I have never felt so grateful. You looked me in the eyes until the song ended. At that moment, I knew I had the most loyal friend.
I want to be your girlfriend back then, I really do. But we wouldn't work out." A tear finally ran down her cheek. "I like girls... I don't even know when it started but I'm sorry I can't love you back the way you want me to. You've been here by my side all this time, loving me with all your heart. But this is all I could give-- I thought if I helped you find some friends, you'll eventually meet someone worthy of your love!" My eyes became hot with tears as I hugged her gently.
What a dick I am. She's not the selfish one. I am! How selfish of me to think I'm justified in her love because of the time we've spent together.
She finally let out a loud cry in my arms. "I'm so sorry! I didn't have the guts to tell you and led you on for a long time."
I break the hug, tightly gripping both her shoulders. "Don't be sorry. There's nothing to forgive. I don't care who you love and I'm a fool if I did. I can't forgive myself if I lose you because of my pettiness."
I wiped the tear off her face. "I hope I leave with our friendship still intact." I softly said, giving her a weak smile. "What do you mean leave? I thought you were just talking about leaving this launch." She glanced around, looking at the dozens of people in the crowd.
"I'm going to college. To France. Well, Paris to be exact."
"Oh... So you weren't kidding about the long-distance relationship." She fumbles.
"We could still do that though. Platonically!" I gave her shoulder a soft smack. Al laughs faintly.
"Yes, of course. Thanks to the internet, we should feel like we're hanging out like always." I smiled at the thought.
Out of nowhere, my mother emerges and hugs me from behind. "Oh! My sweet baby boy! Look at you! Crying from tears of joy. I know I am!" She laughs, rubbing her cheeks on mine. "By the way, thanks for indulging my request by coming here, Alicia!" My mom held her hand.
"I wouldn't miss this for the world." She replied, giving her a wide grin.
"Right?" My mother agreed. "The last time he played was when he was 10 years old."
"Mom. Can you stop pestering Alicia now?" I asked.
"Nonsense! I'm not pestering her. We're just talking about how good you still are at playing! Why? Because you definitely inherited that from your beautiful mother." She catwalks around.
"I definitely agree. Mrs. Chaotan." My mother giggles like a fourth grader. But her demeanor changed when she saw my father slowly approaching us with a deadpan expression. His deep voice echoed through the walls.
"We need to talk."