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Banished from the Hero's Party, I Decided to Live a Quiet Life in the

Sir_Smurf · Fantasy
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83 Chs

The Mushroom Forest Zoogs

We received a warm welcome at the zoog village when we arrived at dusk the day

after setting out. The plan was to ask the zoogs for directions to the gem giant

village. This settlement was in the middle of the forest, where the canopy of foliage

blotted out the sun's light.

We were sitting on large mushrooms, across a moss-covered fallen tree from the

zoog elder.

"It'sh been a while," the elder greeted me in a friendly tone, shaking my hand as the

tentacles around its mouth quivered.

Zoogs were a slightly grotesque sort of monster. They were large, cat-size rodents

with beard-like tentacles around their mouths. Their hands and feet were more

similar to those of monkeys than those of rodents, and they were dexterous enough

to handle tools.

The zoog warriors standing behind the elder wielded spears with stone tips and

wore armor woven from layers of bark.

"I know it'sh a long way from Zoltan, but it would be nishe if you shtopped by every

onshe in a while like you ushed to."

"I'm sorry for being away for so long. I found myself a partner and have had trouble

finding the time to get away from Zoltan."

"Truly? That'sh wonderful. I've heard that humansh have difficulty pairing off."

The elder drew close to my finger, gently wrapping a tentacle around it. Mogrim

tensed up, but I flashed a reassuring smile.

"Thank you very much. May our friendship continue to be blessed."

"May it be blesshed indeed."

Zoogs considered the tentacles around their mouths crucial organs, and if one was

injured, the zoog would become incredibly ill for quite a long time. Allowing

something so essential to be touched by another was a sign of utmost trust for a

zoog. Their tentacles had a spongy sort of texture that felt nice when you got used to

it.

"I've brought a gift both as an apology for not visiting for so long and also because

there was something I was hoping I could ask your help with."

I laid out the pork. It was about a whole hog's worth of meat.

"Ooooh. We are grateful for your generoshity."

The warriors standing behind the elder started to whisper excitedly when they saw

the large slabs of meat.

"We can never get enough meat. It would be nishe if we could undershtand

commershe." The elder scratched its furry neck a bit. "But if wishesh were fishesh.

We are jusht grateful to have friendsh willing to share with ush like thish. Shomeone,

pleashe take the meat to the preparation tree."

"Feel free to take most of it. A little is plenty for my companions and me. We would

like to have some mushrooms and fruits as well," I said.

"Heh-heh! In that cashe we'll be glad to accommodate you."

Hearing that, the zoogs around us looked at each other and smiled excitedly.

"You really have a mysterious bunch of connections, Red."

Rit seemed to be enjoying taking in the sights as we strolled through the zoog village.

Zoogs were monsters, but they had developed a civilization of sorts. To our left were

branches lined up with lots and lots of mushrooms growing from them—a farming

plot. To our right were zoogs kneading clay.

"That's how they make earthenware. They don't have kilns, so they just roast it on a

fire, but there's a uniqueness to the hand-drawn patterns that's quite lovely," I

explained.

A young zoog working on one piece noticed us and stopped to peer nervously. Rit

waved her hand a little, and the young zoog emphatically waved both its hands, black

from the dirt, back and forth.

"Ah-ha-ha-ha. I've never met a zoog before, but I would never have expected them to

take so kindly to people," admitted Rit.

"Ordinarily, they probably wouldn't," I said.

"Really?"

I nodded. "Zoogs have boundless curiosity. They are more willing to risk interacting

because the oddity of a seemingly friendly human they've never met captures their

interest. However, if they encounter a human they don't know in the forest, they're

just as liable to kill them."

"So on that point, they definitely are monsters." Despite Rit's clear enjoyment,

Mogrim's face was tense, and his hand hovered over his ax. "Are we really going to

spend the night in a den of man-eating monsters?"

"They don't attack people they are on good terms with, and zoogs aren't particularly

strong, either. Don't tell me the valiant drake slayer is actually scared of a bunch of

little zoogs?" I teased.

"Bite your tongue! Of course I'm not scared!" Mogrim glared at me overly defensively.

The menacing look was enough to send the zoogs watching from a distance diving

for cover.

"See? You scared them," I observed.

"Mrgh… Still, is this really going to be okay? Are they going to think I'm an enemy

now and sneak up on me while I'm sleeping?"

"Not a chance. I presented them a gift when we arrived, and they accepted it. Despite

how they may look, zoogs take promises extremely seriously."

"What?"

"On that point, they are a bit of a good fit for dwarves," I stated.

"Hmm. Keeping your word is certainly a virtue."

Promises were important to dwarves. Dwarves highly valued oaths sworn under

mutual consent. Even if it was one made with someone they hated or they knew that

keeping their word would put them at a disadvantage, they believed in doing their

utmost to uphold their end of a promise.

And learning that zoogs had that point in common with them, Mogrim eased up a bit

on his wariness.

"That's mighty respectable for a bunch of monsters."

Mogrim joined Rit in having fun looking around at the creatures going about their

lives.

"When you think about it, the dim light beneath the trees and the damp air is

reminiscent of dwarven caverns," Mogrim remarked.

"You came out to Zoltan from Sir Beard Mountain, didn't you?" I asked.

"Indeed. The missus went out that way as a traveling merchant, and it was love at

first sight. I'd like to show her around there someday, but given my situation, I can't

ever return."

"For a group that puts such a heavy weight on keeping promises, that's a pretty hotblooded sort of reaction," I said.

"Mhm. Because we live our lives following the rules, if we ever do happen to run into

something that pushes us to betray those values, we can end up acting impulsively,"

Mogrim replied.

Dwarves were indeed fastidious when it came to rules, which was why I was always

a bit surprised that Mogrim had run off with Mink, but I guess it was precisely

because dwarves were so strict that he had. Maybe that was also why romance

stories written by humans were secretly so popular among dwarves.

Looking up, Mogrim suddenly let out a shout. Two zoog children were hanging from

a branch overhead. Seeing them, Ruti and I immediately started running. There was a

snapping sound as the tree limb broke. The zoogs' scream resounded.

"Ruti!"

"I know!"

My sister moved in front of me and interlaced her fingers, and I leaped up onto her

hands.

"Yah!"

Ruti poured strength into her arms and sent me flying. Her aim was true, and I

caught the two zoogs falling through the air.

"Rit!"

"On it! Levitate!"

My body started floating before slowly descending to the ground. Rit's levitation

magic could only target one person. With two zoogs plummeting at the same time,

she would only have been able to save one, but if I caught the two of them, and then

Rit ensorcelled me, we would all three be able to land safely.

"Are you okay?" Touching down, I gently checked on the two zoogs clinging to me.

The kitten-size creatures' black, pearl-like eyes spun as they tried to understand

what had happened. When they finally processed everything, tears welled up in their

eyes, and they clung to me and started bawling.

"Um… uh…"

I was at a loss. I had no clue how to soothe zoog children. I glanced at the others,

looking for some kind of help, but they just had a kindly look in their eyes, like they

were watching some heartwarming scene. I couldn't deny that it was, but I also had

no idea what to do with the children hanging on me. Perhaps I would've understood

had I been a father.

I should get Mogrim to handle this as practice, since he's about to become a father

himself! I thought.

"Cuckoo! Nahko! I'm sho glad you're shafe!"

""Mommy!""

The two zoogs clinging to me jumped into their mother's embrace.

"Phew." Relieved everything had turned out all right, I wiped away the tears and

drool left on my clothes.

That night, we enjoyed an enormous feast.

"Shu shu! Eat and drink ash much ash you like."

In the banquet hall, the zoogs were drinking alcohol made from tree sap while

singing and dancing merrily. The moss covering the trees of the forest was

illuminating the surroundings with a tranquil light. Some type of luminescent strain,

I supposed.

"Thank you sho much for shaving our children."

"How can we ever repay you?"

The kids we had rescued were apparently pretty closely related to a zoog leader and

thus fairly high status. Zoogs had a parliamentary system of leadership. They didn't

have a firm culture of individual ownership, so rank for them was different from the

human idea of it. It wasn't an exact fit, but to put things simply, the children were

akin to nobility.

In zoog society, the farther up you lived on a tree, the greater your social standing,

from living down at the roots to living in the tree's trunk, out on the limbs, and on

the leaves. You would think that might lead to a lot of incidents like today's, but the

timbers they made their homes in were stout and resilient. A limb snapping without

any warning was almost unheard of.

Anyway, because the kids we helped turned out to be high status, our reception at

the banquet was top class.

"You were amazing! Wash that magic?" one zoog inquired.

"That wasn't magic. It was the bond Big Brother and I share—our sibling power,"

Ruti answered.

"Really?! I love my big brother, too! Do you think I can be like you shomeday, Missh

Ruti?!"

"So you're a sister as well? Yes, if you always stay together and get along with each

other, I'm sure you can."

"Yay!"

Ruti seemed to be getting along well with the children we had saved. She had

experienced so many adventures as the Hero, but it felt like it had been a long time

since I had seen her just mingling and enjoying herself with something unrelated to

combat. Back at the start of the journey, when her blessing was still weak, there had

been moments like this. Around the time we left the capital, she had reached a point

where things didn't affect her anymore.

I was delighted to see Ruti appreciating interacting with others, even if it was just at

a little village two days' walk from Zoltan.

"Good."

A bowl of mushroom soup was placed in front of me. Turning around, I saw Rit

smiling kindly.

"I'm sure Ruti liked traveling with you before, but I don't think she's ever enjoyed the

journey itself," she said.

"Yeah. But now she can smile… I'm so happy for her."

Rit leaned her shoulder against mine.

The cooking had a bit of spicy seasoning, but it was delicious. And zoog spirits went

well with hot food. Drumbeats and the trills of a wooden flute made from a hollowed

tree branch intermingled as pairs of zoogs danced odd steps.

"You runts aren't half-bad!"

Mogrim's face was red from all the booze as he strutted, too, determined not to lose

to the zoogs. The short, stout dwarf held hands with a zoog and joined in the revelry.

The zoogs seemed shocked at the sudden intrusion, but before long, their curiosity

about the unknown got the best of them, and Mogrim was bombarded with dance

requests.

Even a tough dwarf like him finally had to beg off, though, collapsing with a satisfied

grin. At that, the zoogs smiled and clapped.

"Red." Rit grabbed my arm. Her cheeks were flushed from drink, which just made her

all the more beautiful. "Why didn't you ever introduce me to such a fun group?"

"I'm sorry. We can come back another time just for fun, if you want," I responded.

"Yeah! Ooh, this is a good one. Say ahhh."

"H-hey… not in front of other people… Fine, fine… Ahhh."

The roasted mushroom Rit put in my mouth was simple, just a little bit of salt for

seasoning, but it was fresh and delicious nonetheless.

We spent the night in the zoog village. Come morning, we began our climb up the

mountains. Our goal was a cave the zoogs had told us of.

"Ohh, the snow's piled up." Mogrim was getting excited as he stepped onto the thin

layer of frost that had built up in the shade of the trees. The air was clear, and Zoltan

was visible in the distance.

"It's a wonderful view," Rit commented. Her ears had gotten red, so I covered them

with my hands, which earned me a tickled laugh.

"It's a good thing the gem giants aren't near the summit," I said.

"Yeah. The three of us can endure extreme cold, and I'm sure a dwarf like Mogrim can

deal with the mountain climate, but cold is still cold," Rit responded.

"Part of the reason I came to Zoltan was because I wanted a warmer climate… which

is how I ended up with you, so I prefer hot summers."

"Weren't you complaining about the heat during the summer?"

"Ah-ha-ha, I forgot about that."

A fox peeked out from the trees, peering intently at the odd sight of a dwarf and

humans. A lump of snow was knocked from a branch by a sudden gust of wind and

fell on the beast.

The fox squealed as if blaming us before dashing off somewhere into the woods.

"Mgh." Ruti was displeased. I guess she wanted to look at the fox more since it was

cute. She glared at the tree that had dropped the snow for a second before stomping

her foot. The tremor shook all the branches around us, sending a bunch of snow

falling to the ground. As a spray of white floated in the air, all sorts of little animals

popped out of hiding to run away. When everything quieted down again, Ruti

glanced at me with a troubled expression.

"I was just trying to knock off the snow so it wouldn't fall anymore…"

"It's fine. They'll be back as soon as we leave," I assured her as I patted her shoulder.

Ruti stared at the empty forest with obvious regret.

We continued our hike until noon. The sky overhead was blue, and the snow

underfoot glimmered in the sun.

"What do you think? About time for lunch?" I asked.

"Yeah!" Rit said with a clap. "I was just starting to get hungry."

"Trudging through the snow can really drain your stamina," I remarked.

We didn't stop to set up camp until dinnertime; thus our meal needed to be

something that didn't require too much preparation.

"O spirit of flame, my hand is thy stage. Dance, dance… Heat Hands."

With Rit's magic, the water in the pot started to bubble. I put in finely cut vegetables,

some fresh mushrooms from the zoogs, and some bacon.

"Let it boil a bit, and then right at the end, break up some crackers and add them," I

instructed.

Before departing Zoltan, I had pasted the crackers with olive oil and spices, so just

dropping them into the soup would give it a little flavor. It was a matter of preference

whether you ate them while they were still crispy or let them heat up until they were

softer. This time I served the broth up while they were firm.

""""Thanks for the food.""""

It was a simple meal, but it was delicious when eaten beneath the vast azure sky

from a place with such a beautiful view.

"It's good, the scenery's great, and the cool mountain breeze makes the warm soup

taste all the better. I'm glad I came, Red," Rit said.

Admittedly, the sentiment was a bit out of place for a perilous adventure.

"Yeah, me too."

However, it was a perfect fit for our trip.

My name is Tisse, and I'm a member of the Assassins Guild. Currently, I'm just an

average person taking it easy in Zoltan.

I'm honestly not sure how much longer I should claim to be a part of that

organization, though.

The spider riding on my hand is my partner, Mister Crawly Wawly. The Mister is part

of his name.

"Well then, what do we do now?" Mistorm muttered to herself.

I really needed to stop playing with Mister Crawly Wawly and deal with what was

happening.

"Treshpasshersh!"

A ratlike monster up in the trees was pointing a spear at us.

"Wait, we're friends of Red's." Godwin was trying his best to explain things, but the

zoogs showed no sign of letting down their guard. "Dammit! If only the horses hadn't

stopped listening to us," he cursed.

The original plan had been for us to catch up on horseback and join Ruti and the

others at this village last night. Unfortunately, our mounts had grown restless as we

approached the Wall at the End of the World, eventually refusing to take a step

closer.

We tried everything we could to get them to move, but they seemed to be spooked by

something and held fast in their refusal. I did my best to bring them to a nearby

settlement, intending to pay for their stabling. The village was up in arms, however,

because goblins were stealing its vegetables and livestock, so I had to chase after the

goblins, defeat them, and bring back what had been stolen before I could finally leave

our horses and hurry back.

I'd dealt with a lot today, and I was proud of myself.

Mister Crawly Wawly patted my head with his little leg.

"Red's the only one they know, so they aren't gonna trust us," Godwin stated with a

shrug. No matter what he tried, the monsters responded with hostility. "Didn't you

claim you could handle this, Master Mistorm?"

"I thought so, since I had come here once before about thirty years ago.

Unfortunately, I hadn't accounted for the fact that zoogs' life spans are generally only

about three decades," she answered.

I had heard that Ruti and the others intended to stop here for directions to the gem

giant village, but I hadn't the faintest notion where their journey had taken them

after that. Yarandrala and I could probably manage to track them, but given their

lead, catching up while making sure not to lose the trail would be difficult.

Our reaching Ruti's group required the zoogs telling us where they had gone.

Regrettably…

"Shu shu! If you turn back, we'll leave you be, but there will be no mershy if you

prosheed further!"

Even Godwin was capable of wiping out the zoogs by himself, so they were no

challenge for us. And we could always get the information by catching a zoog and

forcing it to take a truth serum. They were Red's friends, however. I wouldn't allow

such a violent response.

Noticing my gaze, Godwin forced a wry chuckle. "I know, I know. Besides, it's not like

I've got some big reason to go chasing after them anyway."

"Hmph." Yarandrala fixed him with an icy glare.

Godwin hurriedly amended his statement, wiping cold sweat from his brow. "Ah, I

mean, I'll obviously still do my best to find them, though."

The man had once been a top-class criminal in Zoltan, but I couldn't shake the sense

that he gave off a bootlicking air.

"Anyway, they look ready to strike at any moment. I don't suppose you have any

ideas? My disarming small talk has about reached its limits, and I don't think I can

stall for much longer," admitted Godwin.

Yarandrala raised an eyebrow. "Small talk?"

"Urk. I was just joking; no need to get so bent out of shape."

Godwin had grown more relaxed during our trip. Ever since being taken away to the

ancient elf ruins by Ruti, he'd been dragged into all sorts of things without much

choice, so I felt a little bit bad for him. He was proving to be more resilient than I'd

assumed.

Just then, Yarandrala spoke up after having checked the surroundings. "Have there

been any trees falling or branches that shouldn't have broken breaking lately?"

"Shu shu!"

Hushed words rippled through the crowd of zoogs.

"How did you know that?!"

"I'm a specialist when it comes to plants. A sickness has spread through this forest,"

Yarandrala explained.

"What?"

"Liar!"

"But the limb really did shnap."

The zoogs' will to fight was clearly waning.

"If it ish ash you shay, then what will happen?" one asked.

"I doubt it will be the end of the forest, but many trees will rot at the roots and die."

"They'll die?!"

The zoogs were badly shaken by that. They loudly chatted back and forth with one

another.

"Calm yourshelvesh," a solemn voice decreed, and the creatures obeyed, frantically

clearing the way. "Hail, O tree-leaf-eared one. We have not had an audienshe with a

high elf shinshe my great-grandfather'sh generation."

"This is the first I've met guardians of hyphae as well," replied Yarandrala.

The old-looking zoog who appeared was probably the village elder.

"Guardiansh of hyphae ish quite an old name. It musht be difficult for high elvesh

who live sho long. I became thirty-four thish year, but I'm shtarting to look forward

to returning to Demish's hide and beginning my next journey," the elder said before

rubbing its hands together with a smile. "O tree-leaf-eared one, what do you mean

when you shay thish foresht ish disheashed?"

"The soil around here has changed rapidly over the past few months, and the plants

are suffering for it. The symptoms are not yet grave, but before long, many limbs will

break, and trees will begin to fall."

"Shu shu… That'sh odd."

"The foulness in the earth grows more intense the closer we get to the Wall at the

End of the World. Something might be happening up in the mountains."

"I shee. Though we know of mushroomsh, we have not been given enough time in

thish world to know much of the treesh. We shall do ash the high elf shaysh."

"Elder!

"They are gueshtsh now. Lower your shpearsh."

The zoogs did as it bade, bowing before the elder.

Phew, it looks like we'll be able to manage something, then, I thought with relief.

Yarandrala examined the trees, Mistorm helped out with her magic, and Godwin

prepared a medicine. Meanwhile, I used the information the zoogs had provided to

plot a route to intercept Red and the others.

"The safer option is to catch up tomorrow. If we really hurry, we might be able to

meet up by tonight, but…"

Mister Crawly Wawly shook his head.

"Yes, you're right. Traveling without setting up camp would be dangerous.

Yarandrala and I would be fine, I'm sure, but Mistorm is quite old. Making her and

Godwin hike out on a mountain at night during winter is a bad idea."

The safer option was superior.

"Does that mean we won't reach them today?" Yarandrala asked from behind me.

"Yes. If we forced the matter and continued across the mountain through the

evening, we might find them, but if we didn't, it would mean setting up camp late at

night, and there's also a chance we'd pass them in the dark without realizing it," I

explained.

"I agree. The plan to locate them tomorrow will be fine." Yarandrala nodded as she

sat next to me.

"Have you finished examining the trees?" I inquired.

"The more necessary treatments have been taken care of. It went quickly, thanks to

Mistorm's help. All that remains is for Godwin to finish the medicine, and we can go."

"I see."

Evidently, we would be able to leave about twenty minutes earlier than I had

planned.

"Say," Yarandrala abruptly began.

"Yes?"

"My goal is to reunite with Red and Rit. Mistorm's is to meet up with Mogrim and

help him, and Godwin's coming along because Mistorm told him to. She seems to be

working out a way to wipe his slate clean."

"I see."

"So then what about you?"

"I'm serving as a guide."

"Had you told us that Red and the others had made for the zoog village, you wouldn't

have needed to lead us, right? And from here we'll be following the trail the zoogs set

us on. It seems like there's no reason for you to accompany us."

"Am I getting in the way by being here?" I asked.

"I didn't mean it like that at all!" Yarandrala insisted. I was surprised at how

vehemently she denied it. Her face was deadly serious as she continued. "I'm grateful

for the assistance you've provided. I don't think you've been a hindrance in the

slightest. If it came across like that, then I apologize for not expressing myself clearly.

I was just curious why you were going to such lengths."

"There's no need to be sorry. I wasn't particularly bothered."

Yarandrala and I had fought the day before. I doubt she trusted me yet, but judging

by her reaction, she didn't seem to hold me in poor respect.

Admittedly, I wasn't being entirely honest with her. I had failed to mention that Ruti

was with Red and Rit.

Ugh, my stomach hurts…

Ruti had quit being the Hero. Even if God had foisted the role upon her, she had still

abandoned the quest to save the world. I could only wonder how Yarandrala, who

had been one of the Hero's companions, would react to that.

I was here in case Yarandrala responded to Ruti's decision as Theodora had. If Ruti

had to fight, then I wanted to be at her side. In that sense, I didn't trust Yarandrala all

that much.

"Yarandrala…"

"Yes?"

Part of my job as a member of the Assassins Guild was to probe for openings in a

target that I could exploit, but this was different. I wanted to do everything I could to

support my friend Ruti.

"Why did you become one of the Hero's companions?"

The high elf fixed me with her gaze. "So you know who I am."

"Because I'm friends with Red and Rit, and one other person as well," I responded.

"Which means I'm not mistaken about Red's true identity."

"Correct."

Yarandrala closed her eyes and exhaled. "…I was so sure of it, but it really is a relief to

have some confirmation. Thank goodness. He truly is still alive."

I had heard that Yarandrala feared Ares might have killed Red. Searching for news of

a potentially slain comrade must have been demoralizing.

"I'm sorry. You wanted to know why I joined the Hero, right?"

"Yes."

"It's simple. My cherished friend Gideon—Red—was in that party."

"That's all?" I pressed.

"Yes, that's all. I would have liked to save the world, too, if we could manage that, and

I wished to help people who were suffering. But if that was all I'd aspired to, I could

have joined the army. Choosing to attempt to defeat the demon lord with six people

is absurd."

I was stunned by Yarandrala's candid statement. "Absurd?!"

"Yes, that's the best word to describe it. Why did we intentionally fight with so few

people?"

"To employ the Hero's ultimate battle strength as the core of the party while

maximizing mobility. In fact, the Avalon allied army successfully mounted a

counterattack as the Hero grew in strength to fight the demon lord's forces."

"But that's just because the Hero continued to win. She carries the world on her

shoulders, and if she ever falls, all of those plans will collapse. That's the sort of

foolish gamble the Hero's existence is."

That's…

Red and Ares had always given the impression that Yarandrala was a kindly older

sister with a capricious streak. Yet the woman speaking now held no illusions about

Ruti.

"Hero is indeed the most powerful blessing in the world. And it may seem that its

bearer is acting in the best interests of the world because of the blessing's impulses.

However, that assumption of what is best includes the added expectation that the

Hero will bear everything alone. The best response would be to deploy an army with

the Hero. Not some improvised thrown-together horde, but a proper, trained force

with the Hero as the commander. There is no reason for the Hero to fight at the front.

She should be at the rear to put the troops at ease and grant them courage."

"Red never mentioned you having that sort of opinion," I admitted.

"Mentioning as much to him would only cause him needless pain. Besides, he

understood it as well as I. Sadly, the Hero's impulses would not allow that choice

because the Hero blessing never takes its bearer's life into account. That is surely

why God provided the Guide to protect the Hero."

"So… would you say that there is no need for the Hero to continue fighting for the

sake of the world?"

"Hmmm… I see…" Yarandrala stared at me for a moment. "You don't need to worry

about that. I'm on Red's side… Still, that's quite a surprise," Yarandrala admitted with

a laugh. "I hadn't expected Ruti to be here as well!"

This high elf woman seemed far more hot-tempered, far more cool-headed, far

sharper, and far kinder than I had imagined.