2 Healing and hurting

*I want to apologize, my eyes get blurry at time and I didn't realize this was a female lead story, But I will be switching back and forth between pov's*

Jaz is a very good driver. the last driver I has was hung over and went right over the IED which ended up leaving only 3 of the 10 others with us alive and only myself as the one who could actually now walk on his own 2 legs.

All of the way there all I could do is look for IEDs in the road. I really need to get some help.

we drive up to the bar/restaurant to a full parking lot full of trucks and bikes with the music all of the way up. I could here it even before we got out of her Jeep Laredo. 2 big wolves play bouncer and don't even blink when Jaz walks past them with me. There's a big booth conspicuously placed and reserved for us or I guess me and the pack Betas.

I of course get placed on the edge for easy viewing and promptly get asked for several dances. I barely have enough time to drink my never empty beer. Even when I was healthy and going to the officers club I never had so many women grinding against me. Even at a few of the sleezy places off base where you were guaranteed to wake up with a mattress thrasher before you snuck out of the roach motel. I've never been the center of so much attention.

I couldn't get it out of my head to not be on full battle alert. I kept expecting for something to explode somewhere.

I finally had to excuse myself and go outside and get some air and make sure everything was good and to get my bering.

I am so frustrated I'm pretty sure every single unattached female in our pack somehow found out about this guy. My wolf is so crazy right now that I can barely keep her from ripping every girl close to him to pieces.

I need some air, oh crap he's right here and my wolf just wants to lay down and be mated right in front of everyone.

Open sexuality is quite common amongst wolves, and I have released my stresses with one or of my pack mates.

Who am I kidding on my heat I just have to sometimes. I can't help it but I know I will never get pregnant except from.my mate and guess who my wolf wants, a disabled, nearly crippled dog. Why can't he be one of the ones who saved me when my damned drunk driving dad killed mom and my brothers on that damned mountain.

I hate my dad but I have no other family my auntie rejected our family when mom was killed in that storm due to dad being drunk and driving.

It's not like we could do anything he was a Beta and much stronger than us.

I've worked so hard to be strong and stronger than him but now he's so weak and pitiful it would be a shame to take his self torment away.

Does Luna hate my family so much that I have a drunken cripple for a dad and now a cripple for a mate. Why does Luna hate us so much what have I done to deserve this life.

All I've ever done is be a stronger wolf for my pack and be a strong daughter for my family. I don't know what else I'm supposed to do.

I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I'm a cripple to any pack and I've now found a mate who who probably rejects me because I'm a cripple.

Jaz won't even acknowledge me and I'm positive she also feels our pull her wolf and mine both want each other but she doesn't want to even be around me. Jaz barely even looked at me the whole night and never ever even flinched when woman after woman danced with me tonight. My wolf and her wolf practically wanted to drag us together but Jaz sits like her ass is bonded to her seat. Oh Luna I pray for your help and healing for both of us.

We Eventually go back to the ranch and I climb up to bed and dream about a storm and saving a father and a 10 year old daughter on that day.

I remember pulling a piece of glass from behind her ear thinking that's going to leave a scar. I remember holding my hand pressed against the jagged cut after I pulled the glass out because so much blood was coming from it. Don't die little one I've got you.

By the time the EMT'S got there even in the rain my hand was actually stuck to her head from the blood. Where are you now little one.

I actually woke up in time for breakfast after a good hot shower.

Alpha and his wife, kids and their mates as well as 2 unattached of age female daughters. Nope no mating pull sorry not sorry.

"Well son how was your night?"

"It was a good night I've actually never had so many women wanting to dance with me. Even When I was not crippled."

"For some reason I kept thinking to a night long ago when my family was coming back from camping at the Mc Lain pack where my mom is from when we watched a car slide off the mountain, my dad brothers and myself all went down to the car and saved the dad and daughter before the car fell off and disappeared. Ever since I've been here that's all I can think of."

I don't know what it is but all I have been able to think of since yesterday has been our car going over the cliff and waking with a scar behind my ear that won't stop itching. I can feel a hand holding my head and I keep hearing "Don't die little one I've got you."

over and over. For some reason the voice is now familiar and I can't place it. The voice has never been familiar before but for some reason it is now.

When I was sleeping last night all I dreamt about was a hand holding my head and rocking me gently saying "Don't die little one, I've got you." The hand was so strong and soft I never felt so comfortable in someone else's embrace since mom died.

"Fucking dad, Why did you do this to me. Luna why did this happen, why, why?"

"I can't stop the tears, why did you have to die mommy, I need you mommy."

I haven't eaten breakfast and I'm sure I smell like spoiled rancid beer and stale tobacco from last night but I cannot even bring myself to shower let alone eat.

Suddenly my door bursts open and Madam Alpha Makenzie is standing in my house.

"Jasmine Taylor get you ass up and get showered we have a lot of things to do before tonight. You will be helping me for the ceremony this Lunas Night."

"I don't really feel.."

"What part of what I just said sounded like I was asking you not telling you to get up, get a shower and Do what your Alpha bitch tells you to do!"

I don't know what happened but for some reason my Alpha just did something she has never done and that is command me to do something. Oh fuck I'm in trouble now and I didn't do anything.

"Yes Madam Alpha, I'm up now," I rush to my shower stripping my clothes and leaving a trail to my bathroom where I immediately get under the hottest water I can handle and scrub until no odor of last night or my self pitty remains.

After I was washed and dressed Madam took me with her to set up. I guess because if him, tonight was supposed to be bigger and better than any previous Lunas Night we've had since Alpha and Madam Alphas first time.

Thet evening Madam Alpha made it a point to.make sure I was at my best. she even had her unmated daughters do my makeup and had us all 3 dressed up like triplets. Each of us had high ponytails for some reason which I wasn't allowed to ask about.

Something is fishy to me but I can't get it outbof my head that tonight is different and It's not just about him.

Oh great He must have told my Alpha we're mates.

Well screw that I am to damned good to be downgraded to a cripples wife and I will leave my Alphas before I'm embarrassed by that crap.

As the sun goes down our whole pack assembled in a circle in the courtyard of the main house Madam Alpha Makenzie is sitting in the center of the circle and motions me to take my place next to her with my Alpha Shamus behind her and Joshua in front of us.

As the moon rises every member of our pack reaches out our hands to Joshua and we all let our spirits flow towards Madam Alpha and she in turn placed her hands on Joshua and the Joshua shifted. luckily Joshua just had a robe on so there was no shredding of clothing. and as he shifted all of the pins and such in his knee and ankle could be heard dropping in the stones, his back was a mass of scar tissue, that slowly faded to be smooth and fresh. His muscles rippling and shifting until his full wolf form emerged. A rare silver Timber Wolf in full not Beta but a huge Alpha bigger than my Alpha by a good 25%.

My Alpha is no weak Alpha he is strong enough to be on the council of Werewolves and can nearly command any pack he chooses.

Joshua howls with a sound of authority that I've only heard from Alpha Shamus.

To my surprise my own wolf answers back.

And I swear the moon is shining specifically on him.

"10 years ago," Madam Alpha starts "A terrible accident happend taking several of our family from us on a mountain road. Jasmine you were 10 years old and were rescued by a family who had just left after visiting their mother's family.

after removing the shard of glass imbeded in your head behind your ear, Joshua still remembers telling you not to die and that he held you till his hand was glued to you head with your own blood."

"Now," Alpha Shamus asks, "Do you accept your Rescuer as your Alpha!"

"What?"

"It was Joshua and his family that rescued you that night," Continues Madam Alpha, "It was Joshua who held you till help arrived, it was Joshua who used his hand to hold in your blood on that mountain road, it was Joshua who you remember giving you comfort, it is Joshuas hand ypu feel holding you, it is Joshua that your wolf has been responding to, It is Joshua who also didn't know until just now that it was you he held that day in the rain."

"Will you run with Joshua tonight?" asks My Alpha." Will you shift and run with him tonight?"

I give myself to my wolf and we shifted quicker than we've ever done and I took off with Joshua running behind me. 5 minutes later My Alphas caught up to us and My Madam Alpha ran all of us into the ground.

3 days later Alpha Shamus got word that Andros Stewart of the Stewart Pack was killed in an ambush on his pack by Rouge Werewolves.

My Alphas gave me a new Jeep Laredo and with a new helmet for Joshua we can communicate hands free from my Jeep to his bike all of the way to Wyoming and the Stewart Pack lands. Joshua is definitely not the Beta he was when he left for the military, well let's face ot he sure as hell isn't the crippled Omega he was when he got discharged either.

Luna upgraded and healed him, at least physically now we both need to heal each other spiritually.

Yeah that's not going to happen overnight. Damned I haven't felt this complete since that night and dad will just have to live or die on his own now.

If dad gets over his issues he may live long enough to see his grandchildren, I'm sure after 3 days and nights of Joshua I better be pregnant.

"Hey baby I'm hungry, I think I'm eating for quadruplets or something can we stop someplace."

"Not in home territory yet so whatever looks good to you let me know, if I see something before you I won't keep it to myself."

I do believe we're skirting the territory of another pack along this stretch so we might find some information at a loc