Chapter 33

“I think I’ve always had them. Sometimes I’ll look at another jock and think how attractive he is. I want to touch one of his biceps, a pectoral, or one of his sweaty thighs. The emotion is strong and unsustainable. I’ve never understood it and probably never will.”

“And it’s also troublesome for you, I would imagine.” It was more of a comment than a question, attempting to relax him and make him feel at ease around me.

“Yes, that, too. Sometimes I don’t know who I am, what I desire, and I feel lost.”

“What else attracts you about men?”

“Their asses mostly. Bulbous, tight, and muscular ones. They drive me mad and make me weak. I think about what I could do with them, hungry for their niceness.”

Under my breath, I labeled him a pitcher over a catcher, ready for whatever he had to throw my way. “Do you like my ass?” I walked ahead of him a few feet, wiggled my asset, and laughed.

“I do. It’s perfect for what I want to try.”