Feelings

Pov: Azula 

I felt an extra weight on my body and when I opened my eyes I saw that Kai was hugging me protectively. It took me a while to realize the position we were in, which made me feel embarrassed. 

He couldn't help but smile and put one of my hands in his beautiful hair, which made me a little envious. Looking more closely at his features, I can say without fear that he was beautiful.

I tried to move as little as possible to look out of the window, seeing that it was already dawn.

- Do you need anything? - Kai said affectionately, stroking Azula's cheek.

- I'm sorry I woke you up...

Kai sealed our lips and I couldn't deny the feeling I was having, it was something good and delicious.

- You're happy. - I whispered and hugged Kai. 

- Why shouldn't I be? 

- You silly boy. - smiled at him.

I could say I was in a dream, or better than a dream, but that was undone when I saw Kai's worried expression.

- What's wrong? - I asked worriedly, holding his hand.

- You know... if we're really going to date, it's going to be really complicated. I mean, are we going to have to hide it all the time? 

I admit I blushed when he called our relationship. When I saw those blood-red eyes paying attention to me, I felt like the luckiest person in the world.

- I guess so, but I'm looking forward to a secret romance. - I say excitedly and give Kai a kiss.

- Secret romance? - Kai asked, raising an eyebrow.

- I can tell you that I've been reading some of Ty Lee's books. - I admitted embarrassedly, almost wanting to hide between the covers.

- You're prettier this way. 

- Don't make me burn you. - I whisper, trying to look away from those scarlet eyes.

- It's going to be hard to maintain this relationship with Ozai around, anyone who sees the two of us together is going to cause us problems. - Kai caressed Azula's delicate face as if it were a jewel. 

- It would be easier for you to stick to your plans, look after the village and your other affairs. - After I said this, Kai's eyes became worried.

- Azula...

- I know that what got us into this situation was because of me, but to have a future we have to be patient with our own goals. - I kiss Kai affectionately, making him blush. - When I become the next Lady of Fire, I'm going to declare you my husband.

- What a dangerous ambition, my queen. - Kai laughed sweetly. - Let's slow down a bit, you still have to reach the age needed to assume power, if Zuko isn't crowned first.

- That idiot would never be chosen to be king, Ozai would put a stone in his place if it meant stopping Zuko. - I made fun of Zuko without remorse.

Kai and I completely lost sleep, just talking about our future, only this time, a future I like better than being alone and marrying a stupid noble. 

- Since we're talking about having a house far from the capital. - Suddenly, I feel my cheeks getting hot. - How many children would you like to have? You know, so we can plan.

The question made Kai turn a little red, but soon after it seemed that he was seriously considering his options, making Azula turn as red as a fresh tomato.

- One? Two?! - I asked, counting slowly, looking as if Kai wasn't satisfied. - Kai? How many do you think I have?

- About six! Yes, six is fine.

- By the spirits, why so many! - I complained with shame. - We could hardly rest.

- You asked, I just gave my opinion. - joked Kai, amused by Azula's reaction. - The days would certainly be more fun.

- You're right, I admit, I'm sorry I asked, I'm speeding things up. 

Kai's comment reminded me of the ritual I witnessed over a year ago, when the fire sages tried to discover Kai's lineage. Now that I thought about it, the ritual had revealed aspects of Kai's future, which meant that if I had been chosen to be the focus of the ritual, Kai's children would be linked to me. 

This reminded me of Ozai's order not to reveal Kai's origin because the Fire Lord wanted to keep him under his control. That had always bothered me, but now I had the chance to prove to Kai how real my feelings were.

- Kai... I need to tell you something. - I put my hand over his face and drew his eyes to mine. 

- If you want to tell me that you love me, I'll listen. - Kai took Azula's hand and kissed it gently.

- That too... But it's a bit more delicate. - I sighed a little, trying to find the courage to speak. - Over a year ago, a Fire Sage wanted to meet my father...

I told him everything that happened in that ritual, I would feel guilty and dishonest if I didn't tell him the truth. His expression changed over time, from confusion to doubt. 

- So you've found a way to discover that I'm not really Ozai's son... well, at least that makes me feel less guilty about staying with you. - Kai admitted with a sleepy yawn. 

His indifferent comment surprised me; I'd expected a more natural reaction, not total indifference to the facts.

- You don't mind? You don't even seem surprised. 

- Azula, in all this time, I can say that I've never felt anything but respect for Ozai's strength, unlike you. - Kai kissed Azula's forehead. - If my mother really is some kind of dragon or spirit, the only way to find answers is to find a way back to the spirit world like I did in the past.

- Do you know how to do that?

- I have no idea, but I have a friend who can help. 

- A friend? - A feeling of envy ran through me and made me look at Kai seriously.

- Don't worry, it's someone I met in the last few days, when I was in that humble village almost two years ago. 

- Are you talking about the village you took? - I asked confused.

- Yes, there is a benefactor spirit there that the villagers call the Painted Lady. She and I had a conversation that resulted in an agreement for mutual cooperation.

- You made a deal with a spirit? That's incredible. - I was impressed and couldn't help but get emotional. - What was the agreement?

- The terms of the agreement were that my methods would not harm the flora and fauna of the area. If I saved this village by minimizing the damage, it would be willing to do anything I asked. I could ask them to help me enter the spirit world. 

- It's an interesting arrangement, but it would certainly take years to complete. - I've already given it some serious thought. - You'll have to write me many more letters. 

Kai laughed, finding his companion's comment funny. Sunrise began to flicker on the horizon, its rays slowly illuminating the room where the couple were together.

I couldn't deny that the sun's rays made Kai look like some kind of deity, his bright white hair seemed almost golden somehow and his eyes were provocative because of their color.

I was mesmerized, but it seemed that Kai admired me even more than I admired him, and without warning he climbed on top of me to hold me in a hot kiss.

- I was wrong to take so long. - Kai murmured so that Azula couldn't make out his voice. - Listen Azula, I promise I'll take you with me. 

I couldn't speak or even look at Kai, I was completely vulnerable to him, I felt protected but at the same time like prey for a hungry animal.

- Kai... I think you'd better get out of my room... at any moment the maids will be knocking on the door to get me dressed and I don't want to be caught red-handed on our first day. - I said embarrassed and saw Kai laugh at me.

- Whatever you say, my queen. - Kai teased, got out of bed and went to the window. - We'll talk later. 

When Kai climbed out of the window, I put my pillow over my face to muffle my cry of excitement. 

***

Two months later....

Ozai arranged several private meetings with each clan with financial or military potential to strengthen future alliances.

I must admit that I was impressed by the number of young nobles who didn't have the ability to control fire. Ozai de Fato shrewdly exploited this weakness to boost the nobles' morale for the royal family.

As a princess, I had to attend these meetings to promote my participation in strengthening the Fire Nation. In addition, Ozai ordered me to learn and understand Kai's innate strength and how to use it for more real purposes.

Most likely, my father intended me to be the heir to the throne, and since I've been taught to use everyone around me as puppets for as long as I can remember, it was obvious that I should see Kai in the same way. However, this logic doesn't apply to my boyfriend.

Kai and I had had a secret relationship all this time. We acted normally during the day, with some flirting, of course, but nothing that gave away our relationship. At the moment, we were both doing domination training with Lightning. 

I couldn't deny that I was a little envious of how quickly Kai was able to progress with the basics of this sub-double, to the point of copying Ozai's technique almost perfectly. Of course, he didn't stop helping me, but it was funny to see him trying to be a teacher.

- You're a bit tense in this area. - Kai held Azula's shoulders. - Don't forget that making a Ray makes you an easy target for the other Benders. You have to be ready to dodge at any moment.

- I know, but when you think about it, nobody can survive lightning if it's executed perfectly. 

- Fong was able to survive my lightning bolt....

I put my index finger over Kai's lips to silence him.

- First: you were weakened. Second: Fong would probably die because his organs had been burned. - I put my hands around his neck. - In my opinion, it's inevitable that you'll defeat this monster, so relax. 

Taking advantage of the fact that we were alone that day, I gave him a quick kiss and separated from him. I couldn't deny that I was getting addicted to this feeling.

- I like your protective side, but you also have to trust my techniques. - I pull away to get my towel.

Staying with Kai these weeks has made me discover a weakness that even Ozai doesn't know about, that he's terrible at keeping the conversation going after a kiss.

- Let's stop for today, if we push our training, it could be harmful to our health. - I smiled when I saw how red Kai was with embarrassment. 

- All right... let's rest.

We went to our rooms and enjoyed each other's presence, sometimes the silence was more than enough for us. But our peace was interrupted when Zuko appeared and crossed our path in the corridor.

How I hated him, the bastard looked like he'd just come out of a training session, just like us.

- Kai... - said Zuko gruffly.

- Something's wrong, Zuzu. - I crossed my arms, knowing that this would provoke my brother's temper.

- I told you I hate that nickname. - Zuko didn't hide his anger, baring his teeth like an animal.

- Hmmmm, what a surprise, this isn't your training schedule, are you training in secret? - I laughed, finding Zuko's futile effort hilarious. 

- It's not like you know what effort means. 

- Oh, you're very brave today, Zuzu. - I laughed, but my voice was a little more serious.

Kai put his hand on my shoulder, making me realize my intention, and I sighed to calm down. 

- Do what you want, Zuko, I don't have time for your nonsense. - I followed Kai, ignoring my brother's presence.

Zuko watched the pair with frustration, thinking that he had managed to impose himself in the presence of Azula and Kai, but the reality was somewhat different from his thoughts. Looking back, he saw Kai looking at him seriously, causing the Prince's legs to shake instinctively with fear.

Walking through the corridors, Azula leaned against the wall, one hand on his chest, trying to stay calm.

- You have to keep a cool head. - Kai whispered to Azula. - You almost killed Zuko, I don't think it's easy to cover up the death of a prince.

- I'm sorry, but seeing you try to defy us made me very angry. - I confessed that I was ashamed that Kai had seen me like that. 

-There's nothing to worry about, if you asked I wouldn't mind eliminating you from your path. - Kai whispered. 

- As much as I like you trying to be romantic, you don't have to destroy Zuko for me, if one day I have to, I'll do it myself. 

We followed our routines as usual, me busy memorizing laws and strategies filed away in books, while Kai secured alliances with the nobility and military for Ozai.

After dinner, I sat in my room, admiring the view of the night, the silence and the cold wind soothing me. 

My moment of peace was interrupted when I heard a knock on the door. When I opened the door, I saw Kai dressed in his usual black outfit.

- What a surprise visitor we have here! - I joked and invited him in. - Shall we finish the book or do you have plans for tonight?

In these two months, we've had to be creative in our own way. Sometimes Kai invites me out of the palace for a walk or to cuddle while we read fantasy or romance books until we fall asleep.

- Well... as you know, I'm leaving in a few days. - Kai took Azula's hands in his. 

- I know, don't worry, I'll keep my end of the bargain and you'll keep yours. - I smiled sadly. 

- Remember, I'll come and get you when I'm done. 

- I know, you idiot. - Kiss Kai. - Don't be long.

- I wanted to take this opportunity to give you a present, a special one that I've been preparing for a few weeks. - Kai said nervously, a little embarrassed.

Kai sat down on the bed and invited me to do the same. I laid my head on his left shoulder and watched him raise his right arm with a closed hand.

Sighing softly, Kai closed his eyes and opened his palm, revealing a small blue flame that illuminated Azula's room in the middle of the night.

The blue flame turned orange and then green, as if it could reach any color at Kai's will. Azula watched in silence, fascinated and eager to see what else would happen. Suddenly, the flames in Kai's hand leapt up, forming figures of animals or everyday objects, surrounding the room like a light show. 

I was amazed, I couldn't hide my smile at seeing something so incredible, I had never thought that fire could be so beautiful. I turned to Kai who was silently concentrating with his eyes closed. I gently stroked his face, making him open his eyes, and the flames disappeared into thin air.

- Thank you for this present. - I hugged him tightly. - I'm going to miss you.

- I'm going to miss you even more. 

Next chapter: Return to Jang Hui