[Warning - Scumbag Selfish Lazy MC. if you like cursing at MC, if you want to squeeze the life out of the MC, if you want to pray for MC to die in every chapter then this is the story for you.] "Is Automation Cheat Enough? No? I guess I will have to Automate Cheating too." He's been scammed in hell and now need to work for Hell Guardians. However, his laziness made him gain the power of System, an Automated System. He does not want to work at all, would he survive the fires of Hell or become an Enlightened One? Even his fate is lazy enough not to know. -------------------- #ACTION #ADVENTURE #SYSTEM #WEAKTOSTRONG #CULTIVATION #OVERPOWERED #TRANSMIGRATION #ISEKAI #KINGDOMBUILDING #XIANXIA Sorry, guys, no smut, no harem, no romance, no slice of life, no power of friendship. [[-Let me know if you are interested in Extra Chapters for every 200 power stones? I am a slow writer but I will try my best to double the chapter post in a week, now I post one chapter in a day, 7CH/Week. if you guys cheer me up then for every 200 power stones I will post an extra chapter, max +7Ch/Week, in total 14Ch/Week. Let me know in comment or Vote directly, Thanks for the support!-]] Cover art AI generated.

WoodenPaw · Eastern
Not enough ratings
152 Chs

0001 - Alt+F4ing Life Doesn't Work Here.

"I am innocent. Please believe me!" The fat bald human in a t-shirt and shorts pleaded with the Judge of the Dead. The icy cold floor was not at all discomforting in front of the cold merciless eyes of the Judge.

"The proof is irrefutable." The ghostly voices echoed in the darkness. "Cast him into fiery hell!" Judgment delivered.

"NOOOOOOO!!!" The human screamed in horror. He never imagined that someone like him, who spent his entire life reading novels and playing video games without harming anyone, would be sent to hell for the sin of wasting his life. Nobody told him that was a sin too. Nobody told him there would be an afterlife. He cursed at all the atheists!

Two guards stepped forward—one with a Horse Head and the other with a Bull Head.

"I am more than enough to tackle a feeble like him, Brother Bull," the Horse Head guard declared. Swiftly, he covered the screaming and crying mouth of the human, dragging him away. The Bull Head guard eyed both of them suspiciously, snorting in the end.

After a while, the Horse Head guard stood near the fiery edge, a creepy grin on his equine face. The scorching heat didn't bother him as he peered down into the flames. However, the heat became unbearable for the plump human, who was already sweating profusely, huffing and puffing, gasping for breath in terror, as if he would melt even before being cast into fiery depth.

"You think you're innocent, mortal?" The Horse Head guard sneered, his voice echoing eerily. "No excuses for a wasted life. Your time spent in made-up imaginative worlds has consequences in the afterlife." He undid the gag.

"But I never hurt anyone! I was just enjoying stories and games!" The human pleaded the moment he gained his voice, desperate amid the oppressive heat and the ominous threat of the hellish suffering below if he got tossed down. Strange screams and cries echoed from the fiery depths, sending a chill down his spine despite the intense heat roasting his skin.

The Horse Head guard laughed, a creepy neigh sound filling the dark hellish surroundings. "Doing nothing can be a sin too. You had the gift of life, and you wasted it on useless things. Now, face the consequences."

Just as the guard prepared to push the condemned plump human into the fiery abyss, the ground trembled. The Bull Head guard, who had been suspicious earlier, charged forward, pushing the Horse Head guard away.

"What's going on, Brother Horse?" The Bull Head guard shouted, his voice like thunder. "Are you so eager to punish a soul without thinking?"

The Horse Head guard, recovering from the shove, glared at his fellow guardian. "He's a waste, Brother Bull, meant for the flames. I'm just hurrying up the process. Obeying the command."

The Bull Head guard snorted, not convinced. "I say, he deserves a chance. Let him explain."

The fat human eyes lit up, a chance, a spark of hope. "Please, I beg you! There must be a mistake. I may have spent my life having fun, but I never hurt anyone. Can't I get another chance?"

The Bull Head guard thought it over, looking between the scared human soul and the stubborn Horse Head guard.

"Brother Bull, you're sticking your fat nose where it doesn't belong," the Horse Head guard complained.

But the Bull Head guard raised a hand, signaling for quiet. He looked at the condemned human. "Tell your story, mortal. If you want mercy, make your words count."

The fat human took a deep breath, desperation in his eyes. "I might have had a careless life, but I never meant to hurt anyone. I get it now, and if you give me a chance, I'll try to fix things. Please, don't condemn me without a fair shot."

The Bull Head guard's gaze stayed firm, but a touch of kindness softened his face. "Brother Horse, we need to be fair in our judgments. We can't throw someone into eternal fiery torment without careful consideration."

"What about the Eternal Order? He has been given judgment, and his fate is sealed. Cast him in the fire, he is useless, and he is no help to anyone. A waste like him, a trash like him will waste another chance." The Horse Guard argued, his equine face contorted in disdain.

"NO! I will not waste another chance. I have learned my lesson. Please give me another chance, please help me!" He cried as his sweat and tears mixed together. Snot flowed out his nose as he huffed loudly both in heat and terror.

Both Bull Head guard and Horse Head guard looked at each other as if communicating through eyes.

"Your fate has been sealed, there is nothing we can do about it." The Bull Head guard laid out the truth. Hearing his words the hope in the eyes of the fat human started to dwindle, for a moment he found a spark of courage, he wanted to yell out 'If there was no hope then why did you show it to me? Were you playing a cruel trick with me?' but he stayed disappointingly silent.

"However, we can help you in a certain way so that you don't have to be subject to this cruel fiery punishment for a while." The Bull Head guard spoke slowly and calmly, offering a faint hope amid a cruel judgment.

"Help? You will…help me? Yes, I want your help. I need your help, please help me." The Hope in his eyes returned, even brighter than the last time. He started blabbing, agreeing to anything to get away from this scorching heat.

"Help? Why should we help you? What's in it for us? You are just a burden!" The Horse Head guard interrupted, still filled with disdain for this human.

"No! I am willing to change, I am willing to do anything, please help me!" The fat human struggled to speak but still expressed his deepest plea for a chance at escape.

The Bull Head guard nodded and sat down near him, giving him a friendly gaze. 

"Mortal, we are not lying about your fate being sealed. None can defy it, it's the Eternal Order. However, I feel you need a chance, we will give you a chance but only to delay it. Eventually, you will be cast into the fiery depths." His eyes had pity for the human. 


"But, the help we are mentioning will help you to delay your fate. How much? It will depend on your sincerity." The Bull Head laid out the terms, his tone compassionate yet firm.

"I am sincere! I am sincere! I AM SINCERE!" He yelled to make them believe. He would now agree to anything to get away from this heat.

"Very well, I believe you." The Bull Head guard felt satisfied.

"But I don't" The Horse Head guard interjected. He was not in the mood to give a fat life-wasting human any other chance at all. He walked forward to finish his task but the Bull Head guard stopped him.

"I say, he deserves a chance." The Bull Head guard glared at the Horse Head guard. 

Seeing the Bull Head guard protecting him, he quickly dragged himself behind the safety of the large stature of the Bull Head guard.

"Fine, but if I see a single notion that he is not honest then I will personally drag him away and kick him down to the fiery depth." The Horse Head guard snorted a neigh.

The Bull Head guard nodded. "Can we trust in you, Mortal?" He asked. A genuine question in his glowing gaze.

"YES! Yes! I am honest! I will not be a disappointment at all. Please! Please believe me." He begged with all his sincerity, hope and desperation filled his eyes.

The Bull Head guard nodded again acknowledging his conviction. "Follow us." 

He used his sweaty, tired hands to stand up, but the heat intensified the moment he tried. So, he crawled away from the edge to gain some distance from the heat and tried again to stand up.

Meanwhile, he noticed both Horse Head and Bull Head Guard had already left him far, he needed to catch up so like a miserable creature he gasped for air and deployed all his strength to catch up to them while dragging his elbows.

Both Horse and Bull Head Guard were standing in front of a statue and arguing frantically about something, something in their own whispery language. The fat human tried to listen but as if words were missing his ears, he could hear the intensity of their argument but not the sound or what kind of words they were using.

"Finally you are here, useless scum!" The Horse Guard turned and cursed. The Bull Head stayed silent.

"Human, you are now our slave, as long as you listen to our commands, you will stay out of the fiery end of your existence. But that does not mean you have escaped, you have to bear some of our burdens and if you fail to deliver then you will be punished accordingly." The Horse Guard speech turned into a decree.

The fat man nodded in sadness, accepting his new fate.