Daisy's Story

Walking around the school, seeing everyone in their groups, I feel all their eyes on me. Various groups of girls giggled as I passed. I kept my head down and my eyes lowered to the floor. They were all looking at me.

I pull my hoodie over my face and scurry to my locker, careful to avoid the eyes of the other students. As soon as I reach the safety of my locker, I breathe a sigh of relief and throw back my hood.

Grabbing what I need and slamming the locker door shut, I give a little yelp of surprise. Toby grins at me from the other side of my locker door, "Daisy, you'll never guess what happened. So in science class, I accidentally fell asleep again. But then the new girl, Jade, she woke me up when the teacher called on me. And guess what I said, 'Mitochondria.' It was the right answer dude! I guess I'm secretly smart or some shit but dude," his grin starts to falter as he studies my face, "You feeling ok? You look kinda sick."

"I'm just feeling a little tired you know?" I lie. In truth, I stayed up all night robotically watching cooking shows. Not that I was into cooking shows, but the voices coming out helped me feel less alone.

Toby nods, "I gotcha, I'm pretty tired too. My last class is English so I may take a nap then," he pauses for a moment, "Need me to walk you to class?"

"No thanks Toby, I'll be ok today."

Toby nods again, "Ok Daisy. Let me know if you need anything." He pats me on the shoulder and saunters away.

I walk to my last class, pulling my hoodie back up for protection. The hallways are nearly empty by this point, so it doesn't really matter, but it's a comfort. When I get into the classroom, I make my way to my seat in the back of the room, trying to keep unnoticed. Unfortunately, that didn't get me very far.

"Daisy, pull your hood down and come up here and solve number seven, " The teacher called.

My heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest. My hand slightly tremors as I reach to pull my hood back and stand up. I walk slowly to the front of the room, my hand still shaking. The problem itself is simple enough, but when I reached the board, my hand shook so hard, I could hardly write a straight hand on the board. Instead of the solution, I scribbled on the board uncontrollably. The laughter behind me pounded in my ears as tears formed in the corner of my eyes.

"Daisy, if you're not going to take this class seriously, I'll have to see you in lunch detention tomorrow. Now either solve the problem or sit back down, we don't have time for this."

That was an easy decision. I raced back to my seat as fast as possible and buried my face in my hands, just waiting for school to be over. I wanted to go home.

The teacher pulled me aside after the bell rang. "Daisy, I want you to come in for lunch detention tomorrow. The way you behaved today was just unacceptable. We can't have you goofing off in class like that again." She watches as I bite my lip and nod, "Good. Have a great day Daisy!" She focused her attention quickly on her work.

Embarrassed, I dry the beginnings of my tears and walk out of the classroom. I just want to go home. I see Toby, no longer the sleepy kid he was during the school day, but laughing with another girl. That's fine. I didn't really want to talk to Toby anyways.

I kept replaying the day over and over in my head as I walked home. Their laughter rang in my ears as my feet pounded on the sidewalk. I hugged my arms to my chest and kept my face down, always down. Then it was interrupted by a collision.

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry," I instinctively blushed.

"No worries hon," a voice answered back. I looked up to see the pretty college girl, who worked at the library on Toby's street. Rosanna, I think her name was. She bit her lip as she studied my face closer, "You ok girl?"

I nod, shifting uncomfortably, wanting to find a way to escape the situation. In response, she smirked and shook her head.

"I know what you need. Hot chocolate and a good book. We're not that far from the library and I'm going to be late for work anyway, might as well bring a visitor."

As soon as she brought up the library, I could feel my hand start to quiver. Inhaling calmly, I forced myself to speak, "I got a lot of homework to do, so I don't know if I can."

Rosanna let out a twinkling laugh, "Don't tell me you're scared of the library too! Listen, I know what people say about it, but honestly, it's just an old building with some books. Come on, I make the best hot chocolate. I'm not taking no for an answer."

Well, I used the only excuse I could come up with, so I saw no other choice but to head over. We walked over to Toby's street and into the library as Rosanna held the door open for me. She walked over to the staff room and told me to make myself at home, she'll be right out with the hot chocolate and book for me to read.

I walked around and found an area with some couches and an old lamp. Not wanting to be rude, and still very much so wanting to go home, I sat down stiffly on the couch.

Clip, clop, clip, clip. I heard the sound of old shoes coming down the stairs. An older lady, very short, with hair in a neat little bun and a smile on her face, came down the stairs. I stood up with a start.

"Oh please dear, don't be frightened. I came down when I smelled Rosanna's cocoa. I've never tasted anything quite as magical," she beamed in excitement, "Now what can I do for you?"

My body seemed to relax as she smiled, "I'm just waiting for Rosanna. She said she'll get me a book."

The woman looked into my eyes for a moment, then called out to Rosanna, "This girl needs a copy of 'The Color Purple' dear. You'll find it in the back." She turned back to me and smiled warmly, "If you don't mind, while we wait for Rosanna, I can show you around the library."

She seemed nothing more than a sweet old lady, and I was rather curious about the library, so I nodded. The old woman nodded too and began to show me around the library. She pulled out a book on the shelf. "You may find yourself enjoying this one." The book had a black cover and the title 'Daisy Gonzalez'. "And my name is Auntie Tess if you need anything else. I'll be in the back checking on Rosanna." And with that, she walked into the back.

I don't know why, but my hand started to shake uncontrollably as I held the book. Perhaps that was a warning, but I was way too curious to not open the book. I flipped through some of it, tearing a few of the pages with my tremoring hand. My heart began racing as I skimmed through it.

I saw my childhood, where I was a quiet kid, considered kind of weird, but I was still happy. I relived the first time I met Toby in Kindergarten, my very first and best friend. I never really had many other friends, some came and went, but I always had Toby. By the time I got to high school though, I felt like he wasn't enough. Then Dustin came along.

The book echoed my experiences upon meeting Dustin with terrifying accuracy, almost as though it was happening now, "His sandy brown hair and blue eyes were so striking, my heart pounded seeing him by my locker. Before then, I didn't realize someone so perfect would even know someone as weird as me would even exist. I didn't have much time to think before he stopped me. 'Hey Daisy, this is kind of awkward for me,' he grinned sheepishly, 'but I think you're really pretty and I'd love to get to know you more. Are you free for a movie on Friday?'

"My heart stopped, 'Of-of course!' He smirked in response, 'I'll pick you up at 8.'"

I skimmed past this, not wanting to recall my happiest month with Dustin, my naive self never once predicting what could happen next. The book knew what I couldn't, "Dustin invited me to a party, my first party! He picked me up around 7 and took me to his friend's house. When we got there, everyone else was drunk and dancing and playing games and making out. I felt my hand begin to twitch, but I ignored it so I could just enjoy the party.

"Dustin gave me a couple of cups of beer from the bar. As I drank, my head started feeling light while my memory started growing foggy. Dustin dragged me upstairs into a bedroom and smashed his lips on mine. It was so slimy and gross. I threw him off.

"'What was that for?' he sneered drunkily. Dustin shook his head, 'They were right, I couldn't date you for more than a month. You're just too weird.' Tears ran down my face as I clumsily sank to my knees and sobbed. All I could hear was a camera click, then the door open and shut. I walked home.'"

As I skimmed through those memories, tears began to form in my eyes. I wanted to go home. I wanted to be anywhere but here. It felt like everything up until now was hanging over my head. I can hear the laughter of my peers as Dustin told everyone how I practically threw myself at him; how he wanted to be nice for a month but after my stunt at the party, he just couldn't continue to lead me on. I was called a whore, a wanna-be, strange, so many other names. My hand was out of control and I sobbed.

Rosanna must have heard because she rushed out with a mug of hot cocoa and a book tucked under her arm, "What's wrong hon?" She set down the cocoa and book and pulled me into a hug, "It's ok babe, it's going to be ok."

I wanted to go home. I push Rosanna off me and grab the book. I only have one thought on my mind, I want to go home.

I rush out of the library, leaving the mug of cocoa on the table and Rosanna standing concerned as she watched after me. Running, tears streaming down my red face, I go to the only place I called home.

I ring the doorbell of Toby's house. He opens it, seeming surprised to see me, "Daisy, what's wrong? You're shaking like a leaf." He wrapped me in a tight hug, "What happened?"

I told him in between sobs how lonely I felt, how it feels like everyone is laughing at me, how I just wanted to be invisible. All the while, Toby listened and held me.

When I finished, he sat in long silence as I sniffled and tried to catch my breath. Finally, he spoke, "You went to the library, didn't you?"