Chapter 4:"Potato Girl"
For the next three challenging years, Jay struggled to survive. The scarcity of food forced refugees like him to turn to farming in the remaining wasteland, a desperate attempt to prevent famine. Meanwhile, the government initiated enlistment efforts to reclaim Wall Maria from the Titans.
Being a kid was a blessing in disguise, keeping Jay away from the enlistment and the grim fate that awaited many enlisted individuals. It seemed the authorities viewed using civilians to reclaim land from Titans as a suicidal mission, perhaps a tactic to reduce the population and alleviate food shortages, although no one dared to question it.
Despite attempts to remain hidden, commoners, even children like Jay, were not spared from being used as next bait. To his surprise and dismay, Jay found himself among the recruits of the 104th Training Corps. As he stood among fellow cadets, listening to the instructor Keith bragging, a single thought crossed Jay's mind: "What a drag.".
Instructor Keith's bragging was followed by the intimidating rite of passage, as he singled out each cadet one by one. Jay, however, remained composed. Unlike Eren and others from Shiganshina, Jay didn't possess the same fiery resolve. Survival was his sole motivation; he didn't want to face Titans helplessly.
When Instructor Keith finally stood in front of Jay, unleashing a scream that seemed to spray disgust, he demanded, "Who the hell are you?" Jay, maintaining his calm demeanor, replied with unwavering eyes, "Jay Ragar from the Shiganshina district, sir."
A moment of silence hung in the air before Keith questioned, "Jay, what did you come here to do?" Jay's calm response followed, "To survive, sir." Keith, irritated by Jay's straightforwardness, retorted, "Survival, huh? You came to the wrong place. Here, you're just the next bait for the Titans. How do you plan to survive, Jay?" Jay calmly replied, "I came here so that, sir, I won't be helpless against Titans like I once was. That's how I survive, sir."
After a brief moment of intimidation, Instructor Keith moved on to the next cadet. Jay's words, however, didn't go unnoticed among the cadets, sparking curiosity about his choice to become a trainee not knowing he was forced into the role for being burden for others.
Though Jay outwardly maintained his composure in the presence of Instructor Keith, the pressure was undeniable. Sasha's antics of munching on a steamed potato during the enlistment ceremony almost caused Jay to lose his cool. He couldn't help but think, "She's indeed savage. Rare."
After the ceremony dispersed, Jay returned to his bed, avoiding unnecessary conversations with his fellow trainees. Despite being around the same age, he felt different, uninterested in the attempts of others to engage with him. This distance provided the space he desired. Until dinner, Jay stayed in his room, only joining his fellow cadets at the table when it was time.
Taking a seat alongside Jean Kirstein, Jay kept to himself, paying little attention to Jean. Eren's words and Jean's attempts to provoke Eren were lost on Jay until Jean remarked, "Despite being terrified deep down inside." Before Eren could inquire, Jay calmly and expressionlessly addressed Jean, "Jean, are you honest?" With a smile, Jean replied, "Aren't I?"
Jay then asked a more profound question, "Have you ever seen someone dear to you eaten alive by a Titan?" His words silenced the entire dining hall. Jay continued slowly, "Have you at least seen a Titan?" Jean remained silent, unable to find words. Jay, standing up to leave, delivered his final statement, "Even if you're not brave, at least try not to humiliate yourself by claiming you want to hide behind the wall when Titans can breach it."
Jean attempted a casual response, "Hoy hoy," but Jay's strong gaze prevented further words. That day, everyone in the hall gained a new perspective on Jay.