1 A true piece of garbage
A resentful look painted Eisen's scowling face into an ugly mask that evoked both horror and pity. The current subject of his intense, hateful gaze was his bank account's near-empty balance.
"Fuck."
For once, Eisen found that he did not have the words to express his complete and utter rage.
'I have to last three motherfucking weeks on only fucking instant ramen!? How the fuck am I supposed to pay for my fucking rent!?' he frustratedly lamented within the depths of his tiny brain.
After rising from his well-worn computer chair, Eisen slouched towards his apartment's kitchenette, looking for something to eat. After a few minutes of searching, he found some leftover fast-food in the fridge, which he promptly microwaved.
He sloppily ate the greasy leftovers like a dirty pig, with the occasional grunt and slurp. Actually, comparing him to a swine would be incredibly insulting towards all pigs.
After he finished his disgusting performance, he stumbled back towards his comfortable, greasy gaming set-up. His reflection glared back at him from the computer monitor's dark screen; an overweight, greasy, middle-aged man with a permanent scowl.
UNDER CONSTRUCTION
After he finished the microwaved takeout, he flopped onto his bed and let out another deep sigh. "Those goddamn geezers only send me money once a month. Fucking cheapskates."
His parents were actually very generous, considering they gave a fully-grown man spending money, as well as money for paying rent.
Eisen had lost most of his rent money gambling illegally. The rest, he spent drinking and smoking with his friends. And then, he blamed it on his parents for not giving him enough cash.
Truly, human garbage.
With nothing to do, he began browsing the internet and social media on his phone.
"What the hell!?" he exclaimed loudly, focusing on one particular article.
The title of the article read, "Auction offers for Myth-ranked item in hit VRMMO game, Fantasy World, reaches 100,000 urks!"
"Urks" is a slang term for Universally Recognized Currency, or URCs.
Eisen grit his teeth, and growled. "Why the fuck is a video game item so expensive?"
His part-time job as a restaurant waiter paid only around 13 or 14 URCs per hour. He would have to work more than 7,000 hours to get that much money, assuming he scrimped and saved and didn't eat for months.
With 100,000 urks, Eisen could pay rent for at least 40-something months.
"It can't be that hard to play some shitty game," he mumbled to himself.
He glanced at the virtual reality headset on his bedside table. He had bought the expensive appliance to play some, ahem, mature games, but maybe he could make a fortune in virtual reality?
It couldn't possibly hurt to try.
Quickly, he scrolled on his phone and bought the game that appeared the most on the news articles, Gigantomachia, with the last of his spending money.
Gigantomachia was coincidentally the best choice for Eisen; if he wanted even the slightest chance at profiting, it would be far easier in a newer game in which the rare items and hidden treasures hadn't already been discovered.
He laid down on his rumpled bedsheets, and wore the clunky headset.
Suddenly, Eisen found himself alone in a vast empty space. Mist curled around his ankles, making him shiver slightly.
A screen appeared in front of him, asking for a username. He thought for a moment, before typing something out: "Five Five."
Suitable for a sorry bastard like him.
A prompt asked him what class he wanted to pick. The classes available to him were:
Arcane Apprentice, the beginner class for mages. While rather unwieldy early-game, they become powerful damage-dealers with some hard work.
Brawler, a uncouth and powerful class that relies on unarmed attacks and brutal attack power.
Deacon, the lowest-ranking cleric. They develop impressive healing and defensive power.
Fighter, the roots of all melee weapon classes. Depending on how they build their stats, they can occupy a plethora of roles.
Guardian, a purely defensive class which eventually gains access to powerful life-saving skills.
Ranger, a long-range damage dealer that uses ranged weapons. With excellent tracking and hunting abilities, their prey will find it hard to escape.
and Tinker, a beginner steampunk mechanic. They wield the power of machinery and steam, and despite being a tedious class, their growth potential is amazing.
After considering for a moment, he mumbled to himself, "Sword are definitely the coolest, let's go with Fighter."
He quickly adjusted his appearance on the interface and picked a random starting town, before pressing "finish." A flash of light blinded him temporarily, before slowly fading.
Eisen was standing in the middle of a cobblestone road, surrounded by a few short, squat buildings. A few horse carriages cantered down the avenue, while pedestrians strolled casually through the small town. Market stalls lined the road, with merchants hawking their various wares.
The scene seemed slightly dampened by the enshrouding night. Virtual reality games like Gigantomachia could be played while sleeping, and a large majority of the player-base would be online at night. Therefore, day in the real world would become night, and vice versa.
The night was cold and dark. However, the light of the moon, stars, and lanterns allowed Eisen to see rather clearly.
"Let's find some quests!" he cheered to himself, before wandering towards a few merchants.
"Hey, give me your stupid quest," he said.
The merchant turned his attention away from his wares and business logs. The bearded trader looked him up and down, before shaking his head. "Sorry, sir. I don't have anything for you to do."
Eisen promptly turned around and ran towards another NPC. "Stupid fuck, give me a quest."
The pedestrian didn't even look at him before walking off.
"Hey, come back here! You fucking asshole!"
He grumbled, wondering if all the NPCs were going to ignore him.
After asking around for almost half an hour of being denied or ignored by every single NPC, he frustratedly screamed into the air. "Why won't they give me a fucking quest!?"
A few people, players and NPCs alike, turned to look at him, startled.
He glared back at them, seething. They nervously turned away from him and whispered to themselves.
At his wit's end, he drew his sword and walked over to an NPC. "Give me something to do, or face the consequences."
The NPC trembled, and backed away from Eisen with a pale face. "P-please don't hurt me."
"Just give me a quest!" he yelled, as he waved his sword threateningly.
Suddenly, Eisen gasped as the wind was knocked out of him. A guard wearing heavy plate armor with ornate designs had shoulder-tackled him in the stomach. He dropped to the floor, wheezing and spitting.
[Mudbrick Town Guard lv. 50]
Several players nearby pointed and laughed at him with their friends. "Look at that dumbass. Attacking an NPC in a safe zone, how stupid is he?"
The guard followed up with a slash from his greatsword, dealing over 800 damage.
[-824]
The guard was equipped with upper-tier armor and weapons, and had a much higher level. Attributes alone could completely overpower Eisen, who wasn't even level 1.
Eisen watched as his health bar immediately dropped to red, before disappearing. His vision blurred and faded, the pain dulling his senses.
He immediately awoke back in the empty darkness, the cold mist chilling his ankles.
[You died! Deducting 1 Level and 1,000 random Skill EXP.]
[Not enough EXP to deduct.]
[Penalty canceled.]
[You were killed for attacking someone in a safe zone! You will be jailed for 30 minutes.]
The darkness disappeared in a flash of light. Eisen found himself lying on the floor of a dirty jail-cell.
[Time left: 29 minutes, 57 seconds]
Eisen looked disbelievingly at the timer.
"What the fuck?!"
He groaned and face-palmed. Over an hour of time wasted, for nothing.
With nothing to do, he browsed the internet to look for someone to aggressively disparage while waiting for the timer to deplete. Suddenly, his face became incredibly fierce and twisted. He yelled in rage, slamming his fist against the rough, stone wall.
"Fucking hell!" he roared, his voice breaking the silence of the jail.
The forum post on his display read, "Noob attempts to threaten NPC, gets rekt by Town Guard."
A video was attached, which showed a crazed Eisen waving his sword erratically at an NPC. A guard tackled and killed him with a swipe of their sword.
The video made him look foolish and pathetic.
The comments on the post ridiculed him.
Storm Cloud-11:34 AM
Hahaha, what a dumbass.
Silent Snow-11:34 AM
Honestly, this guy must be r*tarded or something.
Yesterday's Dinner-11:35 AM
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL WHAT A CLOWN
The post already had over 1,000 upvotes.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" Eisen's yells echoed throughout the jail, his face incredibly red.
He winced, tears at the corner of his eyes; once his rage cooled slightly, his fist began to hurt from punching the wall. He opened his settings and shamefully turned down the pain sensitivity from 75% to 25%.
Eisen began bitterly waiting for the timer to end. While he did so, he began looking through the Gigantomachia forum.
The reason Eisen received no quests from the NPCs was due to his rude temperament. The NPCs in Gigantomachia are incredibly intelligent, and do not react well to impolite players.
However, Eisen was human garbage, completely incapable of self-reflection.
"The forums don't say anything about why NPCs refuse to give me quests," he sighed angrily. "What did I even do wrong!? How the hell am I supposed to level up?"
He thought for a moment, and grunted. "I guess I'm stuck with grinding monsters."
