Cooking for Cuisine Cometh

"Just place them! There's nothing to be careful of that's going to kill you or something!" I shouted impatiently to Yan. Yan grumbled and placed them down carefully and ignored my rant.

They were the ingredients for the cultivation Yan and also myself were using for the future. Yan placed them down carefully in an cupboard and grabbed the lock for it.

I was sure enough that F wasn't going to kill us all again with his anime-logic bullshittery powers that he got from multiple energy sources of chaos (including Infinity Stones, Shinju (Chakra) Fruits, Cubes of Power, LOTS of ANIME SHIT, and other things that make him the most powerful motherfucker in this fanfiction for no known reason 𝑾𝑯𝑨𝑻. 𝑺𝑶. 𝑬𝑽𝑬𝑹.).

Honestly, I gave up trying to understand WHAT the fuck was going on with him. The author's intentions want F to be a chaotic, evil (trolling bastard), and bullshittery character of omnipotence, that cannot be reasoned by logic or truth.

He is the character of bullshiet, everyone! Yes, you viewers of the Internet! F cannot be solved or understood from logic although I tried (very hard) and gave up a long time ago trying to understand him!

I don't know what the fuck was wrong with him in the first place, and whatever it is... On the behalf of the Author himself:

𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐭.

#Flashback Starts#

"COME HERE, F~" I sang in (possibly) sadism with a Deagle and a shotgun in my hand.

*NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO*

"I SAID COME HERE!" I shouted back and began to hunt down F in the white void of nothingness while the Author possibly gave both us a deadpan while he tried to restart the universe once more.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!" I ran back from the coming pink and love energy blasts from the 'Magical Girl Power Cannons' that were offensively pink and red from F, who was wearing a princess tiara.

*Magi Magi! LOVE CANNON PINK FIRE CANNON!!!!!*

"WTF!" I called out, running away from the sudden 180 F just pulled into a Magical Girl of Justice and Bullshittery.

*HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!*

"THIS IS WHAT F WOULD EXACTLY DO! DRESS UP INTO ANY ANIME (excluding h*ntai)CHARACTER WITHOUT NO SHAME OR CARE!!!!" I shouted back, running for my entire life from Magical Girl bullshittery.

F was not a girl! He is a man! MALE! MAN! OPPOSITE SEX OF FEMALES!

AND HE WAS WEARING GIRLY CLOTHES!

*WWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! HEH-HEH HEh...!*

"GOD, AUTHOR, CHRIST, MORGAN FREEMAN, SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

AND WAS THAT PADS ON HIS CHEST?!

WHAT THE UNHOLY FUCK IS MY LIFE RIGHT NOW?!

#Flashback Ends#

I furiously shake my thoughts from my head. I knew I couldn't kill him, even with the Author's 'Powers', I STILL couldn't kill him. F was 'kind' enough to refuse to stray a path of chaotic evil in his life or something the lines of his, and 'promised' that he will TRY his best to not to destroy any universes.

But this was his first count of 'accidentally' destroying a universe for a 47th time. While I half-relieved that it was just 47, and he might've hit a million at worse, but I was half-annoyed at how 'clumsy' he was.

Seriously, he's the person that set a 'mind conscious system from a normal human brain from getting fried from billions of memories' on me, outsmarted the Author and most of the smartest people in the multiverse (or what I heard from the Author), has the powers of destroying universes with a snap, bend time, space, reality, life, mind, power, without even moving his finger, kill and resurrect the lives of the whole multiverse (although it takes A LONG TIME), and lastly, F cannot be killed by those who have achieved 'God Monarch' status.

[AN: I'm referencing a term in the Library of Heaven's Path to describe how powerful and deadly F is, although I do not own that novel. Good day!]

What is a God Monarch anyway? Gods among Gods? [AN: Imagine Mark looking at the script in narrowed confused eyes, and also scratching the back of his head.] How does that work, anyway? Whatever... F might've achieved these feats and results, but THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT HE IS STILL A FUCKING DUMBASS!

He had destroyed the universe for a 47th time, while I had my daily beauty sleep from the exhaustion that I had been working 24/7, AND I DO NOT LIKE BEING SUDDENLY AWOKE THAT A FUCKING UNIVERSE HAS BEEN LITERALLY DESTROYED BY A DUMBASS IN A HOODIE AND BOWTIE!

Hahhh..... I hate this style of life sometimes, ya know? Having a casual calm life (My Earth Life), and then suddenly, that life turns into a power-striving maniac (My current cultivation life) where arrogant Chinese people do shit, and doesn't like what you do and tries to kill you like neanderthals invading their power and their survival. You literally have to get power if you want to survive when shit hits the fan.

"Mark? Mark?" Someone shakes my shoulder from my thoughts. I wake up seeing Yan, confused and concerned about my mysterious daydreaming about how a dude in a hoodie and bowtie had accidentally murdered/vaporized Yan's whole family, Sect, Town, Kingdom, Continent, and lastly the World itself.

"Nothing, I had a bad dream about a monster in a green hoodie and bowtie destroying the whole universe again." I answered truthfully and sarcastically with a deadpan. Yan and Lao sweatdropped.

"Okay?....." They both muttered in confusion. I shrugged at their reactions of the truth. Sometimes the truth is stranger than fiction... Though, that doesn't work because I'm in a fanfiction.

We both turned to where the door suddenly knocked twice. Yan locked the lock on the cupboard with a click, securing the ingredients from the public.

"Yan Er, are you there?" Xiao Zhan's voice called out from outside the door. Yan's eyes softened into surprise and I moved my way into the wall and leaned on it.

"Oh? Father?" Yan asked back in response. Taking this as a signal of confirmation, Xiao Zhan entered the room with a welcoming family loving smile.

"Yan Er!" Xiao Zhan greeted with a oncoming hug. Yan accepted the hug and turned to his own father. I leaned on the wall silently as Xiao Zhan didn't notice me.

"Father, do you need me for something?" Yan asked as he was surprised that his own father would suddenly enter his own room. Xiao Zhan simply smiled and rubbed Yan's head with care.

"Can't I visit you otherwise? You've been hiding from me for almost 2 months!" He said, and Yan smiled sadly (also fearfully, but it was well-hidden), because he knew that he was missing out on seeing his father during the two months.

'Beating the shit out of him is what happened during those two months. But I'm not saying that...' I mused as I remembered kicking Yan's ass over and over like it was breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Still, I hadn't taught him the basics just yet.

Xiao Zhan noticed this and formed his face into concern and into a frown. "Are you still blaming yourself? It's the Na Lan's Family's loss, because my son, is not trash!" He stated to his own son with pride and concern.

Yan smirked in determination in response. "Of course! Don't worry father, three years from now on, I will definitely visit the Yun Lan Sect!" Yan stated with determination. Xiao Zhan's eyes narrowed carefully.

"Father is not saying you're inferior to Na-Lan Yan-Ran, but Yun Lan Sect's power..." Xiao Zhan trailed off. Yan smiled.

"Father, there are things you can't hide from! As a man, I've got to face it!" Yan stated loudly with determination. Xiao Zhan's grin widened in pride and gratefulness.

'Those were not the words I would've used on my mind... But it counts.' I thought as I shrugged the MC's morality to face fate or destiny. Fate or Destiny can be a bitch, and you just have to get used to it.

"Ha Ha! Good! That personality is just like mine! Your two brothers will be happy to hear this!" Xiao Zhan stated loudly, as he clenched his fists in excitement.

I also forgot to mention that Yan had two older brothers...? I didn't meet them, as they were travelling or something.

"I'll be waiting for the day that old bastard, Na Lan Ge Ye will beg me to take back the bill of divorce!" Yan smirked in relishment. I 'hmm'-ed in agreement. The Elder guy had the vibe of the 'old asshole arrogance'.

"Yan Er..." Xiao Zhan searched his pockets before grabbing on a vial. He held the Elixir of Foundation Spirits to Yan. Xiao Zhan smiled in father-ly love.

"Here, take this. This is your father's gift!" Xiao Zhan held the vial in his hand and gave it to Yan. Yan smiled knowingly as he knew his own father bought his own elixir for his own son.

"This is..." Yan spoke silently and already knew the answer what it was, since it was him that made it in the first place. Xiao Zhan smiled.

"This is the Elixir of Foundation Spirits! It can increase your training speed. I just won it at the Auction today! Heheh!" Xiao Zhan explained as he chuckled out of awkwardness as the price of the elixir was expensive.

Yan stared at the elixir in thankfulness and warmth. "The Elixir of Foundation Spirits... It must've been expensive... Thank you, father." Yan looked at his own father in genuine warmth of the gift.

'The greatest gift of all that can be given is... Love.' I thought, on the behalf of my billion years of experience as I closed my eyes. Love was the... most necessary choice. Hatred... was very stupid and illogical.

Love... I don't think I want any of it now.

Xiao Zhan suddenly hugged Yan in warmth and family love. "Silly kid, as long as it's helpful to you, any amount is worth it!" Xiao Zhan patted his son's back.

"Thank you..." I heard Yan whisper. I 'ahem'-ed to gain both their attentions to me as I leaned on the wall. Both their heads turned to me in focus. Xiao Zhan's face formed in surprise as he finally realised I was present in the room.

"Mark!... I did not notice you. Have been standing there while we were talking?" Xiao Zhan asked to me. I answered with a shrug in response.

"Sort of. I was talking with Yan about the new recipe that I was going to cook for dinner. It's called, Ramen." I explained and took my back off the wall. Xiao Zhan blinked in confusion.

Yan also blinked in realization about the Japanese-style food I was going to nab up. "Oh yeah! I almost forgot about that!" He spoke in surprise.

Now, you may ask: How in the hell did I make Ramen in the middle of a cultivation world, that has no internet, no electricity, no cooking devices (refrigerators, cooktops, etc.), and no ingredients?...

The answer may surprise you... or not.

...

Ramen... Wasn't a type of food that I was unfamiliar with.

I've made multiple Ramen bowls in Animes, Live-Action, Manga, and in several different realities, from necessary equipment, scratch, and foreign equipment such as alien tools to cook a bowl of Ramen.

You guys would be thinking like: "Wait a minute, this guy knows how to cook?" THAT would be one of my hobbies during my forced travels into the multiverse. What can I say? I got bored. So I tried out some hobbies.

There were some interesting hobbies that I came across... Cooking, Cleaning, Martial Arts, Swordsmanship, PhD, Massaging Skills, Stealing, Theiving, Pirating, Scientist, Engineering, Counselling, Therapist, Psychologist, Racer, Player, Carding, Novelist, Animator, Director, Inventor, Teacher, Professor, and so much more that I can't even count.

Too bad I can't use them all in the same time. The human brain has limits to store certain amounts of memories inside. It just does, and I'm not willing to test mine.

Well, Human brain + a shiton of memories = One dead-fried brain.

But you might say: "But MARK~ Shouldn't you replace your brain for a new, modified one that'll store all your memories???"

My answer is this. One. It doesn't work like that. Or this case, in some different realities. An alien brain cannot exist in the Real World because it just can't. The Life-Action reality is just a reflection to the Real World because Aliens does not exist in real life.

Maybe in the future, though. But if I enter a Life-Action reality universe with an Alien brain installed, the whole thing goes "poof!".

And leads to one very dead body with no brain. Also, a very pissed off me that is livid of the fact that I died again with no brain. Literally.

Which leads us to my 'style' of life that I want to live. I don't want a silent, dark, black, endless void of nothingness and death as that would make me bored and every second passed would increase my stress levels which I don't like.

What I would like is some damn peace and quiet. A normal, casual life, with me, basically morphed with the VERY comfortable couch-sofa and flicking in the internet and Netflix for entertainment.

Now, usually one gets bored from seeing entertainment (TV, Games, Books, Novels, whatever that interests you) over and over, and said person has billions of memories that might've seen the entertainment again and get bored as they would've already known what it is.

But, I've got the Multinternet. It's basically a program located in my Iphone that F and I made as a future project of a theorised world. F and I theorised of a world, what if, all the worlds from different realities, time, type, and universe were to be all combined... As one world, one planet. The rules don't matter. No reason or any reason, sudden or expected, but it just happens.

The intended effect would be DEFINATELY total chaos, mayhem, pandemonium, anarchy, and disorder. It is very likely that the whole planet would be destroyed from the 'residents' living inside in a decade time-mark.

Now, F and I would not like to know what the destruction of a whole planet full of different reality worlds shoved into one would do against the whole multiverse. Will all worlds from different realities be affected? Will there be Amalgam universes? Is it the end of the whole multiverse? Will the author's computer suddenly crash and end my eternal suffering of getting forced to travel the multiverse?...

And erase my existence in the fanfiction forever? Not living or dead? No thank you! I do not want my dead existence to be worse. I want to live! I am not sucidal, I just don't like 'this' type of lifestyle that much. A chaotic life is better than none...

F revealed the fact that there were several historical signs of this phenomenon actually happened once before. I AM NOT JOKING. This happened before, and there were several possible evidences that it happened in the past throughout the multiverse and affected it.

The most notable effect it took was in 1996, when the DC vs Marvel crossovers was one of the events of the effect. It was called as we know right now, is the Amalgam universe.

Turns out crossovers were the byproduct of the First Known Big Bang (pending name), when all types of fiction came to life and for some reason, combined each other and exploded into new ideas such as crossovers, fanfic, new fictions, and more.

At least, is what it says on the script...

So! Overall, we don't want countless worlds that is squished into one and then exploded to possibly erasing the whole known multiverse as we know it. Possibly. I really don't want to be erased. But what can we do about it? What if, this Second Big Bang is inevitable, and F and I can't do jackshit? And this where THIS comes in.

Back into the Multinternet, it's a program inside my Iphone 6. It basically hacks any types of electronics, computers, super computers, networks, memory drives, and information and copies and pastes into it. It can't be hacked, as it is one of the advanced programs in the whole multiverse.

It's meant to be undetected by almost everyone. It hacks into the information and duplicates it. For example, it hacks into a computer that has every single episode of One Piece and duplicates the data, and thus, I can watch One Piece offline. But, the One Piece series itself is not completed yet.

You know my travels in the multiverse, right? I usually travel to weird places, AU, different worlds and timelines... And the Multinternet (we're working on a better name for this) matches the puzzle pieces by copying the data of a world, that One Piece series, is now complete, and finishes downloading all of One Piece itself.

But that complicates things... The said world in the One Piece is different than the original. Luffy dies when he shouldn't be. Luffy is a girl. Luffy's voice actor is dead and swapped from the guy who voices DIO. All of them is complicated as they are very different to the original.

And F and I decided to make some changes to the Multinternet... One, would be that the collected data would be changed or even edited out into the most possible outcome of the next data.

Two, the full access of all the information collected from the Multinternet is to be restricted and secured and protected, unless if permitted. The information regarding this is very dangerous, as a person would used this information for their deeds to become more powerful as one would say they have a map of the entire multiverse...

Three, it is to be kept in a secret. No one should know about this. Now why do I know? Cuz' I'm a nobody. It keeps me protected from getting this slip. The Author also knows about this (since he's the one that created in the first place) and decided not to use this type of power as it would be 'too early' to introduce this.

You guys (viewers/readers) can know, because, we are the characters inside this fanfiction can't do jackshit about this. And vice verca, you guys can't change the story either.

So I guess it is safe just to explain all of this to you guys... I just mostly use the Multinet (I changed the name. Deal with it.) for entertainment and information. I barely use it at all...

I could've checked what cultivation novel I was in, and know all the spoilers... But F had restricted me from doing this. I still can use the Multinet for any information to find out where I was, but I don't exactly know which cultivation novel I am in...

The Multinet's sole purpose to the Second Big Bang was to classify which type of fiction was involved to the nonsense, and possibly involved later to it. It would be used to pacify the residents by using the information about the resident. After a long time 'calming' the residents down, the world would establish a New Order of the Planet and establised into a working world without any explosions that might've erased the multiverse. Basically, we're going to set up a fucking government and a planet...

And I'm sure that you're very confused on why I decided to change off-topic to Ramen, then to theory of the whole fucking multiverse and what WE do about it, I suggest that to- BLAME THE FUCKING AUTHOR. He gave me this script to 'gain interest to his readers or whatnot' and continue working on the fanfiction with actual readers.

Yeah, but honestly, I wouldn't continue a story that had no one to read it. I'm shaking my head cuz' you guys can't see my third-person texts.

...

Why am I still continuing the 'explaining part'?

We're done!

Why am I still fucking talking?!

...

I shook my head around, furiously. 'Fucking finally.' I thought in distaste. I wasn't going to handle another scene change as there were so fucking obnoxi-

#Flashback Starts#

"WAT?!" I suddenly shouted out, gaining a sudden hatred from the Author and flashbacks for some reason.

"WHAT?! IS IT AN ENEMY?! AN INTRUDER?!" Yan and Lao screamed in response as they were both surprised at my sudden shouting. I blinked as there were no one inside the kitchen but us. I shook my head from the thought, and reopened my eyes and widened them to check.

"It's nothing... Maybe." I reassured the two on-guard human and spirit. They gave me confused looks on what was going on with me. I rolled my eyes.

"Yan, toss me the boar bones and feets. And the cold water." I motioned my hand at Yan. He nodded and brought the bones and feet as I was checking the equipment that I had.

Since I was limited to any of the ingredients or tools and equipment that I needed, I had to improvise. I replaced the pig meat with boar meat (since it was the only meat that was close to pork) that I brutally 'murdered' several hours ago with my lightsaber and Deagle.

Fucking thing was also fast as hell. Took me a while to even get that fat, slobering, shit in the first place...

But the equipment and tools that I needed were mostly crafted or found. Large stock pot and pots? I found out some of them in the Xiao Sect Kitchen and modified them, so check.

Huge Colander? Also made one with reinforced Dou-Qi wooden sticks, so check.

Chopsticks, check. Cultivation novels are somewhat Chinese related, and China invented chopsticks in the first place about 5,000 years ago, so finding one wouldn't be that difficult.

Frying pan? Also check. Used leftover cast iron and forged it into a frying pan. And also a surprise weapon for any unsuspecting enemies...

Knife? Check. Probably the sharpest motherfucking knife in the world. I probably would need to keep this secure from anyone else, especially Xun-Er...

The yandere was strong within her... stronger than both the future powerful MC and myself included. If she were to obtain this knife...

All of anime hell would break loose.

ANYWAYS but the cooking board, I just made one from leftover timber, so check.

Spoons? Just probably carved them out of wood, so also check...

I probably had enough tools and equipment to make a Ramen bowl in the cultivation world for the first time ever, though it my- My... Was it, the 1496th time?...

I remembered that Naruto sure liked Ramen, as he stated that my Ramen was third best, as Ichiraku Ramen being the first, and Instant Ramen Cups being second because of it's short time of cooking the food in an instant.

But nonetheless, I had to cook a fuckton of Ramen bowls because of this...

Yan brought the boar's feet and bones and gave them to me. He raised an eyebrow in curiousity and in confusion while eyeing the ingredients for the Ramen.

"What kind of stuff are you cooking today? Yesterday I thought you already cooked for us?..." He asked as I grabbed ahold of the feet and the bones of a Forest Boar.

"Not that we do mind, but the type of food you make can be eaten from spirits! I could even smell it and eat for the first time after 3 years!" Lao exclaimed, excited about my next dish of cooking I was going to prepare for them.

"I'm making the ingredients for Ramen. Cooking those takes about more than half a day to make them. I'm preparing them first." I answered and sliced the Boar's feet in medium-sized chunks.

'I guess I'll start with the broth. Takes a lot of time to even get that thing...' I thought as I cut the bones in half.

I separated the boar's feet and bones and judged their weight from my arms. I needed to have at least 4 pounds. I checked it twice, and the weight was about slightly more than 4 pounds.

Though it didn't matter, as I needed to feed about more than a dozen people... I placed them down on the cutting board continued the same process over and over again.

Soon, I had a pile of boar's feet and bones that were enough to feed a whole army. I eventually put them to a stock pot with about 100 pounds of feet and bones and placed them to a hearth.

I held the bucket of cold water with two hands and poured about gallons of cold water into the stock pot and half filled the water of the pot. I used another stock pot let it boil for the other ingredients. Before spilling the water on the stock pots, I then noticed that the water was flithy and unsanitary for anyone to consume.

I frowned as I forgot that they didn't invent water filters yet. I had made a makeshift water filter out of bamboo-like plants, but I couldn't install it to the Xiao Sect entirely, because I was too busy of the work I've been working on.

I went to grab my spoon. I placed it on the center top of the water and focused on cleansing the unneeded grime and dust into the spoon. The grime and dust suddenly moved from an invisible force and focused to the spoon.

Eventually the water would be purified from grime and dust. All of the grime and dust were on the spoon as I pulled it out from the pot. Disgusted of the various shits on the spoon, I quickly yeeted the contents from the spoon away from me.

Now it was time to bring up the heat.

I chucked in some timber and some sticks inside the hearth and lit the whole pile of wood on fire with a "snap" on my fingers. I let the stock pots heat itself from the hearth. I turned to Yan, who gave me a disdain and jealous look from his face while he crossed his arms.

"What?" I motioned my arms in a 'duh' position. Yan rolled his eyes.

"Now I know that your ability is so overpowered. Why couldn't I get it?!" Yan whined and pouted while Lao pat his student's shoulders in agreement. I deadpanned.

"I'm sure everyone would've had this ability in the first place... Even you." I added. Yan and Lao widened their eyes in shock as the fact that they could be more powerful than before.

"WAIT, WHAT?!" Yan shouted in shock as he couldn't believe what I just said.

"It's true. Yan, you're capable of manipulating Dou-Qi like I do. Everyone does. The only problem is that you don't have enough experience on manipulating energy with a 100% compatibility... Yours is roughly about... 4%. Lao is close to 15.56%..." I explained as their jaws dropped.

"The only reason that I'm manipulating Dou-Qi very well is that I have 100% compatibility of controlling energy. The only person close to 100%, might be a Dou Di (Dou God)." I explained casually. Yan's throat choked on air as he coughed and got that out of his system.

"Are you... Fucking, SERIOUS?! The only person that is close to 100% compatibility... Is a Dou God?! That's the strongest realm anyone can be! Are you saying that you're stronger than a fucking god?!" Yan shouted as he was shocked and full of disbelief that I was far stronger than a literal god. I simply shrugged. I didn't add the fact that a Dou God had at least 43% control rate...

"Meh, I've killed gods, false gods, gods among gods, and unkillables before. Wasn't exactly a subject I'd like to remember again..." I was silent as I remembered the blood, sweat, and tears to kill 'HIM'... Yan took this message and decided never to bring it up again. I sighed.

"Let's move on for more important subjects, shall we? Yan, call out to me if the stock pot have some sort of grey foam/scum floats around on the top, okay? And the other one, it has to boil. Move around some of the meat and bones with the chopsticks. Helps to 'quicken' the cooking. Lao, can you check the stock pot's fire temperature is down to a simmer?" I asked them both as I moved to the cooking board.

"Yep. I'll tell you when I see them." Yan replied back and checked the stock pot.

"Sure, Mark! I'll be glad to help!" Lao spoke, gleaming and excited and tended the fire with a firestick. I sweatdropped at the enthusiasm of an older man.

Now it was time for the Chashu Pork. I wiped the sweat on my forehead and decided to tied a cooking bandana.

'Wait, shit. I forgot to put on an apron! Fuck!' I cursed and quickly put on the makeshift apron on me and began to work on the pork.

I placed down a wooden bowl next to the cutting board and brought the ingredients such as ginger, garlic, and green onion. I dipped the dirty knife in water and purified the meat and bones off the metal of the blade. Later I swung the knife to brush the leftover water off the knife. Carefully.

I peeled the ginger with the knife and scraped off the ginger skin away from the board. I rapidly sliced the green onion and diced them into small pieces as the same for the ginger and the (already peeled) garlic.

I scraped the sliced pieces into the wooden bowl and put a cup of soy sauce, (China also invented it about 2,200 years ago) and a cup of rice vinegar, and added several teaspoons of sugar to counteract the sourness to at least replicate 'mirin' taste.

Then I added a cup of fish sauce, and another cup of sugar to also add in. I mixed all the contents inside the bowl with the chopsticks with great skill that I had learnt from my previous experiences.

After I was satisfied of my work, I brought up a large ol' piece of pork belly that I sliced up from the boar and rolled it like a big ol' carpet of meat and tied up the meat with some plant fibre and tied knots around it.

SPPLNIT!

I blinked. The meat itself ripped the plant fibre with the kinetic force and actually tore it apart. Boar meat was obviously different to pig meat, but not to this extent from what I expected...

Blinking furiously at the sudden result, I reinforced the plant fibre with my own Dou-Qi and tied around the carpet of meat again. THIS time it stood still and tied up. I then later dumped the carpet of boar meat to the mixture of the Chashu Pork and mixed it together, using chopsticks and some help with the Force.

I repeated the same process again and again until I had shittons of Chashu Pork in wooden bowls. I wiped the sweat on my forehead as I was getting rusty with my cooking.

"Mark! I can see some grey foaming scum on the pot!" Yan eventually called out. I took a deep breath and walked towards the stock pots. Yan looked at me in concern when he saw the state I was in.

"You alright?" Yan asked to me in concern at my exhaustion. I motioned my head in a 'so-so' manner. His eyes narrowed down in a worried manner.

"Is there anything that I can do to help you?" Yan asked, as he wanted to help me from the strain I was having. I narrowed my eyes.

"It's a long night. If you're any better than those lousy cooks I had put up with, then yes." I sarcastically commented, remembering my first day with the other cooks and chefs had potentially turned me into Gordon Ramsay, and made my throat tire out from all the shouting and cursing I've had to put up with the shitty cooks.

HOW THE FUCK DID THESE FUCKERS MADE PROPER FOOD FOR THE XIAO SECT?! I WOULD'VE BEEN CONVINCED THAT THESE FUCKING DONKEY-DOODLE FUCKWORMS JUST ORDERED THE FOOD FROM THE MARKETPLACE!

They were fired at the first day I had to work with them. They would've made all of my hard progress turn to nothingness if I kept them. Needless to say, I've been working alone this whole time with Yan, Lao, Xun-Er, and rarely Xiao Zhan, helping me out since. Yan was also a decent cook, learning a lot of cooking techinques from me everytime that I had cook.

"What do I do?" Yan asked as he stared at the stock pot. I searched my pockets for the necessary item for the job.

"Here! Use these!" I threw a pair of heat-resistent gloves at Yan. Yan caught them instinctively and put them on. His face showed confusion as he looked at them.

"What do I do with these?" He asked, and inspected the gloves.

"You gotta drain all the water from the stock pot. We just need all the meat and bones, not the water." I explained and went to grab my colander and placed it down near the stock pot. Yan went to grab the stock pot.

He tried to lift the pot. Key word: 'tried'. "Jeez, this is heavy!" Yan struggled to lift the heavy-ass stock pot full of water and boar meat. And believe me, it's heavy as fuck.

"How'd you even lift this thing?!" Yan shouted as he barely lifted the pot off the stove. I slapped a hand on my face and decided to help him.

"Okay, now tip the water!" We later angled the stock pot in a way that the water passed through the colander and the feet and bones were caught from it. Yan's hands were shaking in pain after he had to hold the heavy pot...

After emptying the pot from the water, I moved the colander next to the bucket of purified water and left them there for later. I soon told Yan to clean the stock pot with purified cold water for use. I then focused on the Chashu Pork instead...

'Now I've made the meat, I've just got to preserve it long enough.' I thought as I bit my lip. Luckily, I brought my own foil of thin, aluminium-like metal that was VERY FUCKING HARD TO MAKE at my side.

I covered the top half of the wooden bowls with the aluminium foil and sealed and pressurised the bowls air-tight, so it wouldn't soil and become rotten. I repeated the same process on to the other bowls.

After I was done, I put them in a makeshift refrigerator (basically an makeshift icebox) for future uses. I got back to the colander that had the steaming meat and bones. I strained the boar's feet and bones with cold water by using a chopstick and scraped out the grey gunk I could see.

I placed back the boiled/cooked boar feet and bones back inside the clean stock pot (although Yan lied on the floor for some reason) and filled the stock pot for about 25-people servings consumption (It was one huge stock pot) with cold water and placed it back to the burning hot hearth until it simmers.

While the stock pot was boiling, I went to the cutting board and brought some fresh onions, scallions, and ginger (peeled). I sliced the onions into quarters and resisted the urge to cry as I continued to slice the onions. I wiped my eyes after I finished slicing the onions and soon chopped the scallions and gingers.

Next, I let the cast iron frying pan into the hearth and threw in the chopped and sliced ingredients and let them cook and be fried. I waited until the vegetables started to cook and I shook them until I got a nice dark colour from the high heat.

I then chucked in the fried vegetables in the boiling stock pot and let the pot be boiled from the high heat of the hearth.

"That's it?" Yan asked in disbelief. I cracked the back of my neck and stretched my arms from the tiredness.

"Yep, that's it. Now we just have to wait for 12 hours until this thing is ready. We're not done yet." I spoke and Yan groaned. I went to grab a bundle of eggs that was from a basket and threw them into the boiling other stock pot for making soft-boiled eggs.

While the eggs were boiling, I prepared a bowl. In that bowl, I put some cups of soy sauce and rice vinegar (with added sugar) and for each part soy sauce and rice vinegar, I put 4 parts of water to the bowl and mixed the contents with a spoon. I had made one half of the marinated soft boiled eggs.

I pulled out the eggs from the boiling hot stock pot with the Force (because I wasn't stupid enough to put my hands on a boiling, painful, pot of hot water) and chilled the eggs by taking the heat out from them by dumping them in cold, purified, water bath.

I plunged my hand in the water and focused on taking as much heat from the water to make it ice cold.

"FUCKTHAT'SCOLD!" I quickly pulled my hand away from the water bath as it was so fucking cold! I clearly saw some bits and pieces of ice in the center...

I let the eggs cool down from the now ice-bath and pulled them (with the Force) out after they were soft-boiled. I peeled the eggs with great accuracy (peeling eggs is sort of hard) but then I later got lazy and peeled them apart with the Force all of them at once.

I dumped all of the peeled soft-boiled eggs into the marinated soft-boiled egg mixture bowl mixed it and then wrapped it with some aluminium foil, air-tight sealed, and then putting it into the makeshift refrigerator.

'Now I have to make the tare...' I thought as I groaned as I needed to prepare the unami packed soup base for the Ramen. I turned around seeing that Yan was resting on a chair while he slept from exhaustion, sleepyness, and possibly my 'perk'.

I groaned a lot harder as I was the only person left. Willing myself to deal with this, I prepared the tare by using the cast-iron frying pan again and oiled the pan with some butter that I made off-screen. I added a lot of dried anchovies on the pan and let soak up of the heat of the frying pan for about three or four minutes.

I deglazed the fried anchovies with some soy sauce and turned the frying pan into a spitting, hot, boiling, frying pan of soy sense and then added about the equal amount of rice vinegar (with added sugar again) and some dried fish flakes...

I also added some Chinese rice wine into the pan stir-ed it with a spoon and waited when the alcohol boiled off. When that was finished, I strained with a strainer (I forgot to mention that) from the tare and the fish debris and filled them with a glass bottle I chucked that thing into the makeshift refrigerator.

Jeez, who knew that making Ramen was so fucking hard?

Now I had to prepare for the ramen noodles. They were the last and the most fucking hardest ingredient to create, because of the fact that I had no ramen-noodle-dispensing machinery to use, and the fact that I had to create another shiton of these things by hand.

Also, the fact that I didn't have anything I could use as a substitude for baking powder, is very fucking crucial, as I needed baking powder to make ramen noodles. How was I going to-

POOF! "OW!"

I rubbed my head from the pain. I opened my eyes seeing white powder everywhere near me. There was also an opened bag of the same white powder in front of the cooking board. I grabbed a whiff of that stuff and sniffed it.

"Baking Soda?..." I muttered in surprise.

*cue the manical chuckling*

I flipped a bird to F and used the Baking Soda instead. I let the Baking Soda sit on a metal plate and heated it with the Force and changed the pH balance of the powder itself and turn it into a mild skin irritant (my hands were fucked after this).

I prepared a bucket of purified water and dumped all of the powder inside and mixed it with a spoon (I'm not using the same spoon over and over) until it dissolved completely.

I added lots of flour (that I bought) into the alkaline water mixture and combined it. It was shaggy and cohesive ball of dough, as it was intended. I later dusted the whole thing with bread flour and let it rest for about half an hour.

I used that time wisely by cleaning the whole kitchen from the baking soda F just unleashed on to the unfortunate room with a straw broom.

After about 30 minutes had passed, I flatened the dough with a rolling pin and folded again and again for about 3 minutes. I then separated the dough into ramen noodles, thin and a bit medium for a SOLID. THREE. HOURS.

I was pretty sure I had bags under my eyes from the exhaustion... I knew my exhaustion and fatique would magically disappear from the "Blessing of Morpheus" perk, as it heals all wounds when sleeping more than 8 - 10 hours.

Yan was also missing, most likely he was kidnapped by Xun-Er of her yandere properties and possibly be tortured into marrying him or something, but I didn't care what happened to the MC.

I barely dusted (threw) the final bread flour on to the ramen noodles and contained them into a spare bag and let it be contained in the makeshift refrigerator.

I also tripped my feet and dumped my head into the icebox. I let my head go into the freezing ice cold waters without any care at all as I thought it would help me deal with the exhaustion I was having.

[AN: Bad idea.]

...

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

...

#Flashback Ends#

"Wha?" I suddenly snapped myself into reality as Yan and Xiao Zhan looked at me with confusion, surprise, and concern.

"Are you alright Mark? You were almost out of your mind for a moment..." Xiao Zhan asked, a bit concerned of my sanity on daydreaming (which is actually the Author's scene changes).

"I'm alright. Get all the members for dinner. I'll be ready to set up some grub tonight..." I told them, and a grin that almost ripped the Patriarch's face formed.

"I'll be waiting for it! Though it's late and cold, and all of us should rest early, but we cannot efford to miss Mark's cooking! I'll tell the others!" Xiao Zhan quickly left the room before I could say anything.

"He missed the fact that I was going to cook outside..." I sweatdropped. A scuffle of thuds outside the room were heard from both of us.

"I already know you're in there, Xun-Er! Come out!" Yan called out to Xun-Er. Xun-Er revealed herself behind the door and poke a tongue out jokingly.

"Hee~ Xiao Yan Ge-Ge is pretty sensitive, how did you know I was in there? I tried my best to stay hidden~" Xun-Er asked, curious of the unknown after effects of Xiao Yan being pretty observant...

Yan was about to answer but stopped when Xun-Er's expression unexpectedly turned into narrowed eyes and in suspicion. She smelled the air around Yan and later frowned.

"The smell of a woman! Where did Xiao Yan Ge-Ge go this afternoon?..." She demanded the answer. I mentally facepalmed myself for not noticing that Ya Fei's perfume stayed on Yan's clothes.

"What are you talking about? I only wandered around-" A teasing giggle from Xun-Er cut his excuse and realised that Yan just got played by Xun-Er.

"You... spend too much time with Mark, you know?" Yan chuckled awkwardly, although the irony was thick of the fact I don't actually spend time with Xun-Er every often.

"I heard the conversation just now. No matter what, Xun-Er will be on your side!" Xun-Er stated determinedly, momentarily shocking Yan and made him smile warmly.

"Okay." Yan smiled at Xun-Er very warmly. Xun-Er's reaction was priceless. She blushed like a school girl and turned her face away from Yan.

"Xiao Yan Ge-Ge, why are you staring at me like that..." She managed to say those words in embarrassment and her face reddened more. Yan and I smirked at the sight at the adorableness of the famous 'most powerful' female character blushing like a school girl.

"Xun-Er is blushing, what a rare sight!" Yan chuckled teasingly. Xun-Er continued to blush even more.

"Noo~~ It's too late, Xiao Yan Ge-Ge should rest early! It's cold out here!" She continued to moan cutely in embarrassment and pouted away from us.

"I don't know about that, but I'm preparing my daily cooking night, remember? I'm cooking something called: Ramen. It's a perfect meal on the cold weather." I told Xun-Er of my daily cooking night of the Xiao Sect. Xun-Er immediately turned her face to me and widened her eyes in realisation of what I said was indeed true.

"Really? Mark is going to cook something new now? What is Ramen? Why is it perfect for cold weathers? Is Xiao Yan Ge-Ge going to come? Will he be there?" Xun-Er asked multiple questions rapidly until I motioned a finger to stop talking.

"Of course, since he helped me in making the Ramen in the first place. I gotta say, he's been working hard on helping me for this food..." I added in, and Xun-Er smiled widely from it.

"Yeah, it was a pain helping Mark. But from the past results that Mark has been cooking for us was worth it." Yan stretched his arms outwards.

"Then I'll be sure to come! When and where do we eat?" She asked excitedly. I rubbed the back of my head.

"The thing is, I set the place of where we'll eat is outside the Sect. Xiao Zhan is reporting the news of my daily cooking night, but he didn't catch where I was going to set it up. Tell him about this, will ya?" I asked to Xun-Er.

"Okay! Xiao Yan Ge-Ge, I'll be back!" She agreed and left the room quickly. Yan waved his hand to Xun-Er. I cracked my neck again.

It was time to get working.

...

After Mark left the room to prepare the new type of meals, Yan focused on his current goals rather than living peacefully eating delicious meals. If he didn't work hard, he would not defeat Na-Lan Yan-Ran...

"Just you wait, Na-Lan Yan-Ran, I will make you acknowledge me!" He vowed determinedly and clenched the vial. His teacher manifested and more focused on Xun-Er.

"Na-Lan Yan-Ran maybe a formidable opponent, but it seems your 'Xun-Er' is more mysterious than her..." His teacher told him. He raised an eyebrow.

"Xun-Er? Why would she be mysterious? I mean, she came to my family at a young age, but no one talked about her past before..." He muttered, starting to grow some thoughts of Xun-Er.

She was beautiful, no doubt. She was also a childhood friend of his, but she was very secretive. He didn't know anything about Xun-Er's past, and didn't search further as it would be rude to know someone's history. They would've hid their past for a reason, and Xiao Yan respected it.

But now it was gaining his attention. Xun-Er had lots of money, power, and skill that were leagues above the Xiao Sect members, excluding the Patriarch, his own father. She was indeed mysterious, and very secretive as his own master told him.

But he knew something some people didn't. She was kind to him. Even his downfall after the sudden lost of his powers, everyone treated him as trash. But Xun-Er didn't.

Xun-Er was Xiao Yan's friend.

That was enough for Xiao Yan to fully trust her completely. But it didn't help the fact that she had a mystery with her. Maybe she could've told her past long ago, and she's still thinking about it.

Xiao Yan slid over the thought and let Xun-Er decide her own decisions.

...

"Xiao Zhan! One elixir for fourty thousand gold?!" "Not only you did not get the skill, you wasted money on that trash!" "I'm the Patriarch here!" Xun-Er's footsteps stopped and entered the room.

She pulled out a black card and threw it at the table. "Stop fighting, I'll pay!" She coldly told the Elders. The Elders and the Patriarch were surprised at the sudden coldness from Xun-Er.

"There's a hundred thousand gold in that card. That settles it then." She told them and crossed her arms.

"Oh, okay..." The Elders agreed immediately as they knew Xun-Er's powers and skills could overpowered them.

...

"Is this what you thought of eating in here?..." Yan asked with unsure eyes at me and the place we'll eat. The place he was staring at was a small wooden shop with Japanese kanji on top as the name of the place.

"Of course. You eat Ramen in a Ramen House. That's how it is supposed to be." I answered as it was obvious thing in the world. I light the fire of my portable stoves and let the huge stock pots and the frying pan to heat. Yan sat on his seat and watched how I cooked.

I brought the makeshift refrigerator at my side and took out the eggs, ramen noodles, chashu pork, tare, and the already done Ramen broth for cooking.

I first let the Ramen broth to cook in the stock pot, and dumped in all of the ramen noodles in the other stock pot of boiling hot water. I waited until they would be consumable for eating. About... 3 minutes.

Now it was for the Chashu Pork. I placed a couple of rolls of Chashu Pork on top of the frying pan to cook them. I needed the deeply browned and crisp texture of the pork, and I had to roll them every second passed with chopsticks.

When it was done, I pulled out the steaming Chashu Pork with some difficulty using the chopsticks on the cooking board and severed the plant fibre tying them. After that, I sliced the Chashu Pork into thin pieces of meat.

"I have not seen such type of pork in my lifetime..." I raised my head to see that Xiao Zhan saw my cooking in awe.

"And I guess you're my Second customer. Please sit on your seat." I asked, and he sat on the wooden stools that I made and watched the spectacle with awe. Soon, Xun-Er would come with 20 different people in need for some grub.

"Woah, what is that?" "Whatever it is, it smells good!" "Mark is definately the best chef ever!" They all murmured and took their seats.

I pulled out dozens of bowls out of the counter and put a few tablespoons of tare in each bowl, and followed by a few scoops of the hot Ramen broth. I could feel the people outside the counter salivating at the marinated pork aroma.

Pulling out a serving of steaming, hot, Ramen noodles with my chopsticks, I dumped these guys into the broth and added two pieces of the already sliced Chashu Pork on the bowl, and a piece of dried seaweed that I made a long time ago.

Grabing my knife, I sliced each marinated eggs in half, showing the soft-boiled texture of the solidified white yoke, and the liquidified yellow yoke. I set one half in each bowl and added in the chopped scallions in them as a finish.

I could even hear all of the people's throat salivate in desire. I rolled my eyes and brought up the first servings of the steaming hot Ramen bowls.

""Thank you for the meal."" They all did their eating preparations. Soon, they grabbed their chopsticks and digged in the steaming hot Ramen.

"Gah! This is hot!" Everyone stopped what they were doing and saw Xiao Yan put a hand on his mouth in pain and breathed in and out cold air inside his mouth of the steaming hot noodles. I deadpanned and handed him some cold water which he snatched it from me immediately.

He gulped up the cup empty. "Haaaahh... That takes away the pain..." He sighed and gave the empty cup back to me.

"You're supposed to blow out the steam from the noodles to cool them down. Then you can eat them without danger." I explained. They all hesitated and did what I asked.

SLURR-UR-URRRP!

"WOAH! This is really nice, Mark! It's so delicious!" Yan exclaimed and slurped the bowl in a fast rate that would've rivalled Naruto's own Ramen pase. I sweatdropped as everyone else said nothing because they were too focused on eating the food.

"More please!" Yan's eyes gleamed in desire and handed me an empty bowl (must be the MC's anime logic of fast eating Ramen rate). I sighed as others would want seconds...

...

Soon, all of the people had their bellys filled with delicious Ramen. They gave me extra tips of money of how new and interesting experience of Ramen was. I accepted the money, of course.

They all left their rooms to sleep as I had to clean up the store itself. I wasn't going to make a batch of Ramen bowls again, becuase it later would make me cook Ramen all day instead of training and progressing myself to power...

Yan and Xun-Er volunteered to help me clean up the store. I felt a growl from my stomach as I forgot I didn't eat my dinner. I was very hungry and decided to cook one last Ramen bowl for myself...

"Thank you for the meal.....?" I then noticed the steaming hot bowl of Ramen noodles in front of me WERE NOT IN FRONT OF ME. I blinked twice and checked myself I wasn't dreaming. The ramen bowl was gone.

"Hey Yan, did you took the Ramen bowl?" I asked Yan unsurely, who raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"What Ramen bowl? I thought you stopped making Ramen bowls from now..." He replied in confusion. Wait a minute.

I dug my hands in the pockets of my blazer furiously. I felt touching paper and pulled it out. It was a small wrapped paper of leftover A4 white paper. I revealed the contents inside and I WAS PISSED.

*Heyya, Mark! Thx for the Ramen! It was delicious!

It was supposed to be your payback on using Baking Soda! Fair's Fair!

From F.*

"F!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

[AN: Please review.]