295 294. Of shortcomings, fears and a little bit of pride
Cassandra Pendragon
With a thought I commanded the vile, wicked swaths of will and power to rise, to come together in a base, corrupted patch of utter malice. A quick glance at the people below revealed open mouths and wide, glossed over eyes, the strength of my voice, combined with the uncontrolled streams of energy, I had unleashed into the air, enough to render the spectators almost insensible. Oh well, for as long as they were breathing everything was peachy, at least where I was coming from. Also, the ones I truly cared for had already gotten used to the scope of my abilities and were about as hampered as they would have been by a mouse chittering at them.
Consequentially the area around my flickering shadow had become sealed off hermetically, a furious angel and an enraged dragoness were more than enough to keep the citizens of Free Land at bay and ensure the meek compliance of everyone around. While Ahri and Viyara, the both of them were privy to my thoughts, after all, did their best to guarantee me a few moments without having to worry about anyone stumbling into my spells and being torn to shreds as a result, the rest of our merry band was encroaching upon the unconscious bodies I had just dropped. On a superficial level their action might have come across as caring, but considering they were surreptitiously pressing a wide variety of cutting implements against exposed necks, that might have been a tad too much credit to their names.
Even the Captains Brightblaze and Nightshade had joined in, ordering their men to support us in anyway they could. I didn't think for a minute they were acting out of loyalty or friendship but the both of them had already understood that I wasn't easily spooked. With the visible remnants of my actions still eerily dancing through they air, the smell of ozone still heavy around them, they had decided to better be safe than sorry. Her sister whispering in her ear, probably with as much venom as actual arguments, considering what had transpired between them, might also have had something to do with Serena's decision. Once I had the chance to, I really wanted to have a chat with them, but first, I had a much more pressing matter to attend to.
A whispered command marshalled the sparks of my power and they flowed towards me, carrying with them the Emperor's magic. So far so good, but now I was at a loss. What I held between the tendrils of my magic was a minuscule, detached part of him, one I knew I could use but still I hesitated. In the past I had always acted which, in this instance, would mean trying to build… a bridge, for want of a better word, and while I was decently convinced I could, considering how much knowledge was hovering just behind the flimsy wall of my consciousness, I wasn't sure.
Even if I managed, sending the equivalent of a transcends thunderstorm through the link might have been impressive and probably even devastating for whoever was lurking on the other side, I still had a feeling that Amon would survived. Maybe not unscathed but he wouldn't be killed that easily and I'd still probably blow up whatever island he was hauled up on. In all honesty, I was well past the point where I'd have mourned the dead, if their sacrifice had allowed me to get rid of the Emperor once and for all, but I just didn't see it and I wasn't willing to act… like an immortal again and simply wager uncounted lives on the possibility it might actually work out.
Which meant… I'd simply postpone the whole dilemma. I already knew that I wasn't the most talented when it came to magic and only because I couldn't come up with a neat solution from the top of my head, it didn't necessarily mean everybody else would be equally slow witted. Ahri had much more knowledge and probably even a quicker mind when it came to the arcane arts, not to mention my mortal companions. Between Viyara, Mordred, Erya, the elves and the vampires I was decently sure they'd come up with something. As long as I managed to seal and store the… ball of doom. Maybe not the most eloquent description, but it simply fit, in more ways than one. This much I could do. Hopefully.
Lost in thought I twiddled the dark, crystalline flask between my fingers, while the heated, almost explosive atmosphere slowly calmed down. Inadvertently I snuggled deeper into Ahri, her warmth a protective blanket, insulating me from the turmoil. Surprisingly, my little stunt hadn't served to endear me to the spectators and that my friends had bundle and tied up the ones I had apparently smote had done the rest. To sum it up, the veiled gazes thrown our way were much closer to what I had expected in the beginning and the whispers I heard over the rustling leaves, when I concentrated, weren't much better. Anxiety and fear mixed with the smallest amount of curiosity.
Funnily enough, the lure of a free meal still had convinced most to stick around but they were giving us a wide berth, as if we were a leper colony in the middle of their oh so perfect town. Figures. Even though, if I had been willing to get over my darkening mood, I would have been forced to admit that I wouldn't have reacted any differently. I had already been starved a few times and knew how one's priorities could change when truly hungry. Still, at the moment I only felt disgusted. I mean, ostracising us for what we were and had done, but at the same time accepting our gifts and relying on our protection, was just hypocritical to a nauseating degree. The thought made me snort derisively since it was also human, oh so very human. Unfortunately most immortals I remembered weren't any better. Come to think of it, they were even worse.
Gods, the older I became, the more trouble I had with taking any of them seriously, be it mortals or immortals. Powerful they might be, in their own right, by they still acted so… childish. And that was already generous, considering how Reia and her friends comported themselves. Most of the time, at least. Still, maybe I shouldn't judge too harshly. When push came to shove, I wasn't much better, really. I simply had to remember my adamant stance on settling in Free Land barely 48 hours ago and now I was already prepared to plant the seed and call it a day. I just wasn't entirely convinced if that proofed I was a moron or rather able to adapt and learn. Oh well, time would tell.
I kissed Ahri's neck and whispered in her ear, entirely oblivious to the conversation she was already having with Erya: "Arthur and his soldiers are doing a fine job, all on their own, and the good Madame has the slaves well in hand. I don't think my presence is very much appreciated, at the moment. The way they're looking at me… If it's alright with you, I'll make myself scarce for an hour or two." She closed her eyes and leaned into me.
"Where are you going," she wanted to know.
"Not far, just somewhere out of sight. There are still a couple of conversations I want to have. Brianna," I began counting off with my fingers, "the Brightblaze sisters, Lyra, Liz, Vanya, Will… I'll probably take our fey with me, as well. And then there's also Nightshade and his deity and the two girls from Alassara's place. Come to think of it, maybe it's more than just a couple." She chuckled quietly.
"It always is. Just call me if you need me. I'll stay and keep an eye…" Erya interrupted her before she could finish:
"I'd like to come, too, if you don't mind." I smiled at her and asked:
"Afraid I might lead your granddaughter astray?"
"No, I can mange as much myself," she laughed, "but I'd still like to hear what you're going to tell them and in contrast to your fiancée or your noble steed I don't have a direct link into your mind. Or is it a secret?"
"No, by all means, join me. Why don't you wait here? I'll see whom I can find and talk to Arthur on the way. Make sure the ones I've cleansed aren't treated too badly. I don't think they'll be able to remember much, but in case they do, I'd rather have them tell us willingly." The fey looked around pointedly and interjected:
"Cassy, no one around would dare deny you, whatever you're asking for. To say it bluntly, you've scared them to hell and back and honestly, they aren't the only ones. When did you learn to use your magic like that?" I shrugged, my gaze roaming over the crowd. No one except for my friends could meet my eye, they looked away as soon as they realised where I was staring. Almost like children who didn't want to be called upon by their teacher. In a way it was funny but also mildly depressing. Somehow I had again become a princess, the insecurity of how to deal with me, fuelled by equal parts of longing and fear, just as palpable as it had been on Boseiju. Great, just frigging great. And I had even truly hoped I had left that particular nonsense behind.
"It wasn't overly complicated. Ever since I've returned, I've become much better at controlling my innate abilities. Don't ask me to use any spells, unless you want me to erase the whole town, but as long as I can touch the magic I want to manipulate there isn't much I can't do." Her eyes went wide, comprehension slowly dawning on her face.
"Doesn't that mean… the book, you've brought from the Emerald Island and the cube you've summoned… can't you…?"
"Use them? Probably. But not right here and now. And there are still some risks. Both have been created by immortals. I've already told you what might happen should I go ahead and try to activate the cube… the same holds true for the book. In a way, it doesn't depend that much on me but rather on what the creators actually wanted to happen. Transcendent magic… it doesn't play by same rules and I'm not overly confident in my ability to control those forces. Destroy them, maybe, but actually make use of them? It's still a gamble… a bad one." I was slowly getting to my feet, my tails wrapped around my waist. It didn't help much but at least I didn't stick out as much as a two legged peacock anymore. I leaned down and kissed Ahri's forehead swiftly before I sauntered off towards the impressive silhouette of my dear brother. Over my shoulder I added:
"I'll be back in a few. Why don't you already collect your child and her grumpy guardian?" I didn't wait for a reply and made my way through the crowd. Which wasn't overly complicated, considering they were practically falling over their own feet to get out of my way.
I sighed, so much for not sticking out. In a way I truly felt like a leper, people shuffling away from me when I approached, unable to meet my gaze. Even the bustling conversations grew quiet and finally died down while I walked by. The youngsters with families were pulled out of the way and the orphans gave me a wide berth, afraid I might suddenly erupt again in an explosion of light. Yeah, a leper or a cruel queen. Either shoe fit perfectly. At least the similarities made me smile sadly but I was truly looking forward to a bit of peace and quiet and feeling less like a contagious outcast or a wrathful deity. Damn it all, no wonder Lucifer had always tried to keep his distance. If I had taken their behaviour to heart I'd have been fighting back my own tears, right now.
Fortunately I had already understood one simple truth: most people changed their attitude and opinions much more regularly than their underwear. Which was appalling enough, in both regards, but at least I could hope to be treated slightly better tomorrow. Unless I managed to provide another otherworldly spectacle. Which wasn't improbable. Come to think of it, I'd most likely have to get used to it. Either that or I'd have to show them that I wasn't to be feared. The thought made me snort loudly. I was an immortal, living amongst humans. It would be akin to expecting a mouse not to fear a lion. Sure, usually the mouse wouldn't be hunted, but if the lion was bored, or angry… what had Ahri sad? To have a place to return to. One where we might even be liked? Fat chance. If my current situation was any form of indication we'd be lucky if we weren't shunned. But then again…
When I looked around, truly looked, I also saw something else. Of course nobody was approaching me, but every once in a while I recognised gratitude in the way a child was shuffling on its feet, unsure whether to run away from or towards me, I perceived curiosity in the sparkling eyes of a few girls who were lingering close by beneath the cherry trees, I became aware of faces I had seen during our last battle, their expressions reflecting more than just appreciation. Maybe it wasn't as bad as I had thought. Sure, most humans, and the beast kin as well, for that matter, still regarded me as an oversized pariah, but some… some where different.
I remembered a conversation Lucifer had once had with Aurora, telling her that a good life could just as easily be measured by the countless enemies we made, as well as the few friends we gained. If you weren't willing to bow your head, to deny your own convictions, you'd always have more people who feared you, who envied or mistrusted you than you'd have allies, but the few true connections, we could still make, were worth so much more than the superficial opposition we'd run into. It didn't matter much, either way. I wasn't going to change and I'd always fight for what I believed in with all I had. If that scared the neighbours, they'd have to deal with it. But maybe, just maybe, I might be able to find a few people around here who weren't as easily cowed.
A real smile tugged on the corners of my mouth this time, when I realised that I had already met more than just a few. Serena Brightblaze was a zealous idiot, but she was also honest and despite her apparent disgust with what I was, what we all were, she hadn't turned away from us. Her sister had sought me out, knowing full well what I was capable of. Alassara was regularly entrusting her precious daughter to me and mine, no questions asked, almost as if we were… family. Maybe we actually were. And I had to admit, a few friends made up for a whole lot of unpleasantries along the way. I didn't need the world to love me, I already had an astonishing vixen who kept me more than occupied in that regard, I didn't even need it to like or appreciate me, as long as I had a few people I could count on and this town had provided amply.
With my spirits restored I managed to ignore the more offensive stares and held my head up high, my tails fanned out wide. I closed my eyes and focused on my other senses for a few moments. The verdant, freshly grown grass beneath my boots, the soft caress of the wind, the warm, invigorating sunshine on my skin, the subtle smell of cherry blossoms in the air lightening the heavy, almost aggressive scent wafting around a myriad of sweating, cooped up people and the chittering of a thousand voices, all meshed together into an almost musical cadence, covering the entire garden. It was lively and yet almost serene, the rising and falling sensations a mirror of my own thoughts, torn between weariness and a growing spark of happiness. Until I felt my ears twitch and rotate of their own accord, a high pitched, youthful voice, I'd have recognised anywhere, crying out in anger.
"You'll apologise or I swear, I'm going to make you," Reia exclaimed, her words almost lost in the cacophony of noises, even to me.
"I'd like to see you try," I heard the sneering reply much more loudly since I had already whirled around. Close to one of the burned out ruins my little sister and Layla were towering protectively over Estrella, who was sobbing on the ground, Archy at her side. In front of them a handful of youthful thugs, around 16 or 17 summers old, were laughing menacingly while their apparent leader was closing in on them. Sparks ignited in my eyes and my world turned silver, once again, while a grim, frothing wave of anger emptied my mind. They wouldn't touch them.
