1 Lilah's Aesthetic Karma

AESTHETIC KARMA

Prologue

LILAH DAZA

My shoulders slumped as I got out of my car. I don't want to remember what I went through this day. Just thinking about it makes me want to skip this part of my life.

The past few days were very stressful for fashion designers like me. There is an upcoming fashion show and Lala Boutique was asked to join in.

I am Lilah Daza, the youngest Filipino Fashion Designer who got this and that award. So, I had no choice but to accept the invitation, or else they might think that I am underestimating their show.

Yeah, Filipinos' mindset is unique.

As a Head Designer and owner of the LB clothing line, I need to work like the world is going to detonate at any time. I am a workaholic woman as they say.

I don't feel like going to my condo yet. I just need this moment to loosen up myself a bit. I just want to have a walk at the park that can be found right in front of La Conchita Condo Units.

I walked around quietly while enjoying the blows of the wind that touches my bare shoulder and makes my blonde hair dance with the sound of crickets. So relaxing.

My feet got glued to where I am standing when my sleepy and tired eyes landed on the seemingly familiar figure. He's with someone else and... They're kissing each other passionately under the Mahogany tree.

Tsk. Nice view. Couples these days are quite aggressive huh? This is a public place for heaven's sake!

I was about to turn my back on them when they both looked at me. I was surprised and confused that I even took one step back unconsciously.

Alester? What the hell is going on?

"Lah?" It's obvious on Alester's face that he did not anticipate seeing me in this place at this hour. I took a glanced at my wristwatch. It's 8:23 p.m already.

And they are still hanging out here? What is this? Over time dating?

I am flabbergasted when I realize who the woman with him is. It's Dara Alvarez, a Fashion Designer too but she's in the rival's company. She is two years older than me.

Do they know each other well? Since when? What's going on between the two of them?

Countless questions flooded my head out of curiosity. My system was completely shaken by this scenario but I tried so hard to organize my thoughts.

"Uhm ... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to disturb you guys. I'm going home, anyway," I briefly explained and give them an awkward smile.

"Lilah."

I heard that. Loud. Clear. But I chose not to look back and pretend like I didn't hear him calling out my name.

I don't even know if it was me who is imagining something weird or if he did cite my name with an emotional tone.

I want to look at them all for once but I couldn't. My lips are trembling so as my knees and I couldn't explain why. It's not like they did something horrible for me to feel this way.

Damn it! Why am I feeling so strange? Why does it seem... I'm hurting?

I closed my eyes and tried to forget what I just had seen. Yes, it was possible and easy for him to find another woman but my mind says that it was impossible. That it can't be. That something is wrong with him being with that woman and I don't even know why my heart agrees with my rebellious psyche right now.

I even gathered up my strength just to steal a glimpse at the man who had once been a part of my life.

Alester Hernandez— my too-good-to-be-with-me ex-boyfriend.

I was hoping that he would watch me leaving this place with the look he used to give me from the beginning to the end of our so-called perfect relationship. But that hope turned into wishful thinking because I witnessed how they laugh and tease each other, instead.

I just hate this day just like how I hate that woman. We're not been on good terms since then but now I am seeing her happy with my great ex-boyfriend.

I was busy watching them from far secretly so it was too late for me to realize that my tears are dripping down my cheeks. It's hot yet I am feeling cold.

Shit! Come on, Lilah!

I went straight to my condo. Palm on my face while I am sitting on the couch. I tried to control my emotion yet I couldn't find my senses and it is driving me crazy. And for the record, this is probably the first time I am hurt and cried because of him.

I got up and went into my room to change my clothes. I also watched my reflection as I passed through the mirror. All I can see is the woman who looks so devastated by her own action and decision.

Am I happy now? Am I contented? Am I ... complete?

I shook my head and decided to go out to find a coffee shop that are still open at this hour. When I came out of the building, I happened to bump into them again.

Alester's hand is on Dara's slim waist while Dara is enjoying her life to the fullest. I had never seen her smile as wide as she does now.

This little...

My soul sighed countless times before I caught their attention. I smiled at them insincerely. The woman's unit is also in this building so I will most likely meet and greet them every day.

My chest tightens for no apparent reason. I seem to have forgotten why I went outside. I felt like a fool just standing here, watching them going inside the building until I couldn't see even their shadow.

I looked up to the sky and asked the gleaming stars why I have to see them flirting with each other.

Is this my karma or what? Is this my punishment for re-writing what the future holds for us?

"Lah. Why are you still here? It's getting late, get inside and have some rest."

I didn't look back or move at all, I missed his voice that I haven't heard for weeks since... Since I broke up with him.

Damn! Stupid Lilah Daza! You have no right to be in pain. It was you who wanted to cut ties with him. It was you who break him into pieces.

I suddenly remember how he begged me not to break up with him. How he held my hand to stop me from leaving. How he cried because of the pain I brought to him.

I ruined our two years' relationship. I chose my career over him. I failed to see his worth.

And now, I can see the changes in him. From the way he looks at me to how he talks to me right now. His eyes are not as brilliant as they used to be. And I know that I am the reason why he changed this much.

Why did I push him away? Why did I stab his heart when his love for me was pure and beautiful?

"Uhm ... Coffee?" I asked him that for the first time. I just realized that I never asked him on any romantic trips.

"I want to but it's quite late already. I still have a lot of work to finish. I'm sorry. I have to go now." Upon saying those words with a plain tone, he gets in his car without looking back at me.

He rejected me. I smiled bitterly.

I know that he is quite busy because he's the CEO of La Conchita Company, and his family is also the owner of this LC building.

I look up at the black yet glinting space above me. I could see his innocent face. Charming smile. Tantalizing eyes. Attractive nose. I can hear his sweet voice whenever he calls my name.

"No, Lilah! Don't do this to me, please? Let's fix this, okay? I don't know why you're acting like this but I am willing to listen. I love you so much and I know that you know that. Let's don't break each other heart, please?"

I closed my eyes and let my tears burst silently as I remember those lines from him. It's just been three weeks since we broke up. How could he say that he loves me so much when he already found a new one in just one blink?

My heart is aching for him and because of him. This damn lonely and painful night is all about him.

Damn it! I love that guy. Why do I have to realize it now when he is with someone else already?