1 1 - My Dad and His Job

I had always hated his office. So white, it really irritated me. Anytime I brought it up he always said something like how easily the earth mortals recognized the place. It made his job easier. I think he was just getting lazy, or bored. Even I would if I kept doing this for hundreds of billions if not hundreds of trillions of years of time. Honestly, even I did not know how old my old man really was.

"…are you even listening to me brat?!" His voice resonated across the white office shaking the whole place, almost threatening to bring it down. Frankly, I was not. How many times had we done this already? Across the room stood a graceful looking old man with long white beard almost reaching the floor, and his set of 'graceful' long white head of hair, if that even made any sense, that reached his lower back. His extremely handsome face, even for his old age, was furrowed in an annoyed manner.

"Not really, no." I answered him. I was tired and bored out of my mind. The boredom on my face was completely evident for him to see. His divinities swirling out threatening to destroy everything around. 'Oh wow, he might actually be a bit angry this time.' I did not really care. What was he going to do, ground me for a thousand years? Pf. Done that. Plus, I could always escape, no matter how tightly he sealed my room. For some reason seals and barriers always came naturally to me. Mother said I took after her. Of course, if he truly did lock me up to the point where I could not leave, I always had the universal key I got from mother. Okay, fine. I always used that to escape. As if I could escape from my old man's seals. But I truly was a seals and barriers genius.

I came out of my thoughts to see my old man with a red face, completely devoid of his 'godly' look. He definitely realized I was not listening to him. Thankfully our house had a rule of never reading each other's mind else he would probably flip if he found out about the universal key. Scratch that. They had a rule of not reading my mind. Something about trying to respect my privacy since I had come of age. "Ok fine, I might have gone a bit too far this time with the whole destroying that Naruto world thing. But don't forget it was merely a version of the original, like always, I never touched the original world. Besides, both Naruto and Sasuke are still alive, even if they are the only two remaining on the planet." Ah shit, he was getting angrier. "Listen, just hear me out. I had a theory. You know that game the mortals love to play? 'If we were the last two on the planet?'"

Honestly, I did not know why father was so angry this time. It was not like other reincarnated mortals that even some he had personally sent down, as well as those gods under him who had sent out reincarnated or transmigrated mortals have never destroyed a world or two. Heck, some even threatened to destroy the universe they were sent to, and he was getting angry about me destroying a copy of an original world?

"*sigh*, that's not the point, son. The reincarnations and transmigrations of mortals is a very balanced and delicate process with purpose and reason, which you would understand even better if you spent time meditating on your chaos laws and divinities instead of spending so much useless time on so much irrelevant things in mortal worlds!" He was doing it again. Spouting his bullshit and trying to make me practice more. I was a natural born god. Like hell I was going to practice more. 'And did he just read my mind? What happened to my boundaries? What happened to my privacy as an adult?'

Yes, the man standing before me was considered one of the most powerful gods in the divine realm. Most of the gods that mortals either worship or pray to work for him. He is all-powerful, all-knowing. His very voice shakes the galactic seas and dries the chaos mountains; My father, 'Bob'. Of course, that was not his real name. He did not really have one. Or more specifically, it was more like he had bestowed upon himself one but it was an ancient name that I had no intentions of ever learning. According to mother, he was one of the first being that came to be during the nothingness in the divine realm. He had managed to stay alive the entire time, through wars and whatnot and whatnot. 'Snore!'

"Balanced and delicate process huh? Okay then, let's see." Walking to his table I picked up a few papers from his desk "Oh, here it is. god of sector 1884. PC caught a virus which sent said virus to a planet cos he wanted to watch a captivating unconventional porn. He started a zombie apocalypse. To try and clean up his mess, he transmigrated a mortal with a system and sent him there." I cringed bad. What the heck was that? Where's the dignity of a god. What kind of unconventional porn was he trying to watch? I kind of wanted to know. Exactly how unconventional could it be; And why did they add it to the report. What kind of bait was this? I coughed and placed that report aside. I'm not treating it as special. Stop judging.

"Here's another one, this god of sector 0101 mistakenly killed a kid before his time cos he looked away for a moment. He reincarnated the kid with a few wishes as an apology? I guess that's not too ba… He was distracted cos he was peeping on a few goddesses having a slumber party. There it is." Fuck, is there no normal report on this desk? Flipping through report after report everything looked so bad and quite honestly, I was beginning to feel bad for my old man. At this point it just felt like my old man was just a butt wiper. Cleaning after the mess of his subordinates. Damn, this really was bad.