Chapter Seven: He's Like a Little Brother [continuation]

Then while on his way, Drake left the others and caught up to him.

"Does your stomach aches so much? The teachers' restroom is a bit far from here. Want me to carry you there?" Drake asked with a hint of concern in his eyes.

Keith was about to say yes to this offer but he caught a glimpse of his classmates who gossiped about him in the infirmary. He forced a smile and apologetically said, "Nah… It's not like I can't walk." Then he continued walking. He can feel that those girls were watching him with scrutinizing eyes. It made his stomach sick, literally. Now his excuse became real again.

Drake also continued to walk with him and even accompanied him inside the restroom. Keith entered the stall and defecated with a troubled heart. While he was sitting inside the stall, Drake leaned by the sinks. He saw himself blushing, so he stopped looking in the mirror. Then just looked at the door of the stool where Keith was. Then with a low voice, he called him. "Keith…"

With a conflicted and embarrassed feeling, Keith responded. "Yes?"

"Were you jealous?" Drake suddenly asked.

Keith's heart was pricked and the butterflies in his stomach went wild. Ploc! The clump of shitty yellow butterflies dropped in the water. The sound was amplified because the teachers' restroom was closed and they were also silent... it even echoed. He doesn't know whether to laugh or cry in this situation. Drake asked him such a question in the most straightforward way possible and here he is losing face in the shittiest way.

It made him think, Does Drake know about my feelings? Does he know that I like him? Does he know about the kiss? Does he know I'm gay? Just how much does he know?

"Why did you ask if I'm jealous?" Keith asked probing him.

"It's… Ahh… It's just-" Drake struggled to speak. Then, he took a deep breath. "You know when I first went to the hospital before I left… sister Kylie talked to me in private. She asked if I like you in a romantic sense. I answered no, and told her that I dated many girls before."

Drake explained that Keith felt cold and his stomach was hurting more even after letting go of some shits. His eyes became watery and red, he took his glasses off since his eyes were heavy enough.

"It was weird," he added. Hearing this made Keith's tears fall. Then Drake continued, "I didn't understand why your sister would ask me that. But when you kissed me, it made sense."

Keith cursed himself, "This is what you get you fucking pervert!!! Idiot!!!"

Keith asked, "You were awake that time?"

"Half-awake, I guess. I realized what happened when I heard sister Kylie say that your crush is quite handsome."

"Fuck, I downplayed your narcissism." Keith forced to chuckle while crying… He could cry as quietly as possible but he can't suppress his sniffles. He pulled tissue papers and wiped his tears and snots but the fluids just kept on pouring down.

Drake heard it and looked distressed. He doesn't want to hurt Keith or make him cry. Then, he said, "I think of you as a little brother. I don't care if you're gay. I, I want to be with you and take care of you. I don't want us to be apart."

"So you have been so touchy and affectionate to me because you treat me as your "little brother"?"

"Hmm." Drake nodded.

…

Keith laughed at himself. "Okay. I'm sorry for kissing you without your consent. Also, I understand what you mean. Message received." He sniffled and took a deep breath. "For your information, I just started crushing at you last week. I didn't like you that much. So, I can deal with it. Just give me a few days and I can be your little brother or whatever except boyfriend. It's not like I don't know you're straight. I knew it was hopeless in the first place. So, can you let your little brother take a dump comfortably and then tell the teacher that my stomach is hurting because that sports drink either contain laxative or it was probably past its expiry date?"

Drake felt conflicted and before he left, he apologized. "I'm sorry Keith."

Keith's tears stopped as soon as Drake left. His stomach ached so bad that even if he pooped his guts, it would still hurt. So, he didn't push it any further. He vomited a little and felt nauseated too. He fixed himself, washed his face, and felt thankful that his eyes didn't swell too much. Vomited again. Fixed himself again. He wanted to stay there for a while but a teacher came. So, he left and went to the infirmary instead. The school doctor wasn't around. So he dealt with it by himself. He took his antibiotics and pain reliever. He put an icepack over his eyes and lay on the bed. He picked out his phone and sent his sister a voice message. "You've been a great help. Fuck you."

After fifteen minutes, he stopped the cold compress. His tummy still hurts like the butterflies have evolved backward and become worms slowly eating his insides. The infirmary has a toilet inside, so he vomited there again. He tried to rest but he didn't feel better at all. Then, He drank hot water to relieve himself, the heat alleviated the pain a little bit but was already enough so that he can look like everything was okay.

He went back to the classroom. Killed the pop quiz. Endured the concerned gazes from Drake and even managed to smile at him. During PE, he was excused and allowed to sit on the bleachers because of his foot while everyone was running around the oval. His sister called him but he declined the call. He scrolled and read some comments in the recently updated chapter of a historical BL novel that has been on hiatus for half a year, Little Lantern on The Yellow River, he scrolled and read without comprehension until his phone dropped dead out of battery life. He's left with nothing to do and felt the stomach pain again.

When he looked at the oval, he immediately saw Drake with Nick and the other guys. He remembered every word he said in the restroom. The sentences like "It was weird", "I think of you as a little brother", and "I don't care if you're gay" left a deep impression on him. Especially the latter, because it was very ambiguous. Does he not care because he's open-minded or because it has nothing to do with him?

He spent most of his life hating himself for the fact that he's gay and different, and now, some people just simply don't care about the fact that he's gay? Then his gaze fell on the girl with bob hair who gossiped about him. She stayed too because of her period. And the sight just made him feel worse. But he did not show it at all. He just sat there, with his typical expression... annoyed.

After class, they hurried to go to the court. Drake stayed behind for a while. He looked at Keith with a pained expression on his face. When other people finally left, and only the two were sitting in the classroom, Keith finally spared him a glance.

He looked straight into Drake's eyes. "I'm the one who got rejected but why are you the one having that kind of face?"

Usually, he'd slip curses into his every sentence. But he sounded so gentle this time.

"I feel like I hurt you so much."

Keith smiled and put his eyes on the blackboard instead. "So what? It's not the first time someone I liked didn't like me back. I liked someone before, I liked him for more than six months and when he found a girlfriend, I gave up, I cried, and I got hurt. After a few weeks, seeing him with her didn't hurt me anymore. I had a crush on elementary, I just said I wanted to be friends with him, but he ran away. I got over it after a few days. I've only liked you for a week. I'll get over you soon. So, stop looking at me like that. I don't need your pity. You don't need to feel guilty."

He spent most of his life lying… Spewing detailed love encounters as easy as breathing was not hard for him to pull off. This is just first love, how hard can it be to get over it? He thought as he try to convince himself that he can get over him. He also said those lies to make Drake stop pitying him.

"Then, can I still be your friend? I like hanging out with you." Drake finally said what he was worried about.

Keith looked at him and smiled again. His dimples sank into his cheeks. "Yeah. Of course."

Drake sighed a big relief and smiled at him too. "Thank you."

"You should go practice. I'm going to my mama and ask for tiger balm."

Drake laughed, "Why do you need tiger balm?"

"The scent makes me calm."

"Okay." Drake smiled and took his bag with him. He looked back at him before he left.

Keith did not go to the teacher's office. He went to the restroom for male students and vomited there again. When he felt a little better, he went straight to their car. He turned the radio on and tuned it to a news station. The news was horrible. It reminded him that plenty of people are in a shittier situation than him. He just got rejected, he just got outed to his crush, and he just got a stomachache thanks to that dumb artificial orange-flavored sports drink. That was all!

How can he compare his unrequited love to an economic crisis?

How important is his rejection compared to a bank robbery?

What hurts more, heartbreak or a 6.9 magnitude earthquake?... Oh yeah. Unlike the earthquake, robbery, and inflation rates, his love life was the only thing he can control, yet he still failed.

After the news, the radio played a K-pop song from a world-famous boy band group. Then he remembers Drake saying he likes K-pop.

His eyes watered again. "Oh, yeah. He likes K-pop"

He banged his head with the beat. Then suddenly, Keith laughed as tears flowed from his eyes. He was like a broken dam. "He likes K-pop but not me!"