GAY

I wake up in a hospital bed. Alone in a room. Looking around everything was tidy. White walls, white floors, white bed, light blue hospital gown, and the classic gray chairs that are surprisingly comfortable.

I take the IV out of my arm and stand up. My cold has already passed and I wanted to get out of bed. A doctor and Nathaniel entered the room.

"Nathaniel, how long was I out?"

"Mackenzie I'm so glad you're awake, I've been waiting for 3 years."

"What, 3 years?"

Nathaniel hugs me and I try not to cry. Then Nathaniel starts to laugh.

"I'm just joking you've only been asleep for a day." I grab a pillow and hit him in the face.

"You're a dick, Jax!" He laughs and wraps his arms around my waist, burying his head into my shoulder. I was comfortable but then the sudden feeling of awkwardness hit me. I look at the doctor and he was trying not to look at us, trying to give us privacy but staying in the room.

I push Nathaniel off and walk toward the doctor. We shake hands and he tells me I'm able to leave. I turn around. And Nathaniel was smirking devilishly.

"What?"

"Your gown is showing your ass, which is cute by the way." I touch my butt and he was telling the truth, I was bare and I turned around to see, two old ladies looking at it. They were giggling and one of them winked at me. I laugh awkwardly and wave at them. I walk toward them, the two old ladies run away and I shut the door.

I look around the room for my clothes and see them on the nightstand beside the bed. I go to the nightstand and take off the gown. Nathaniel laughs.

"What is it now, Jax?"

"It's just funny how your so comfortable being naked around me."

"Why wouldn't I be? I mean, we're both guys." I look at him confused. He stands up and walks away. "You don't know, ok... well then, I'm going to go wait outside."

I throw my pillow at him. "What don't I know?" Nathaniel doesn't say anything and leaves the room. I put on my clothes, the same clothes as yesterday. I wrap my neck and face with my scarf, put my gloves on, and made sure my ears were covered by my hat. The nurse brought me a pair of hot socks, I put my boots on and I tie them tight. I was ready to leave but when I left, Nathaniel was nowhere to be found.

I ask around to see if anybody saw him, with no luck I leave the hospital. I look at my phone which was in the pocket of my jeans, and I go through my contacts. I call Nathaniel but he declined it the first ring. I then call Myles.

"What's up Snow."

"Snow?"

"You're new nickname."

"Whatever, I need a ride can you pick me up I'm at the hospital across the burger place you like."

"Yeah, I'm on my way." He hangs up and I sit on a bench. I breathe in my hands, the fog gets thicker every time I do. A couple of minutes later, Myles shows up in a full snowsuit in a car that had all the heaters on.

"Why is it so hot in here?"

"We're shooting tomorrow, I don't want to get a cold."

"Well don't get heatstroke." Myles laughs and turns off the heat but turns on my butt warmer. I bundle up in the seat enjoying the warmth radiating from my behind. I was warm and I didn't want to get out of the car, but all rides come to an end and we arrived at STAR entertainment.

I get out of the car and help Myles out too, he got stuck with his big snowsuit. Then I had a couple of questions.

"Is there something I should know about Nathaniel?"

"There's a lot you don't know about him, really the one who knows the most is me."

"Why?" Myles took a deep breath and took off the jacket, just to be wearing another jacket.

"Nathaniel and I went to high school together. We were best friends, still are, but we drifted apart. Anyway, we were friends up until he met Markus, he started hanging with some bad people, they'd use him for money cause they knew his family was rich, but the worst was Markus. Markus was homophobic, he found out that Nathaniel was gay so he would beat him up and make Nathaniel give him money or he'd beat him up again. Back then Jax was skinny and didn't know how to defend himself."

"That's horrible."

"I bet there's more to the story, he disappeared for three years after Markus beat him one night. He left with no goodbye or warning. Just poof, gone. Then when he came back, he was muscular, the same face but he was completely different. He used to be sweet, happy, and shy. Now he's..."

"The complete opposite, wait did you say Nathaniel was gay?"

"Yeah, wait you didn't know." I mercilessly shake my head. Myles looks at me with a worried face and I grab his shoulder. "Why are you so worried, Myles? Is there something I should know?" Myles suddenly felt worried. "Nathaniel gets very embarrased about that sort of thing, he acts the way he does when he thinks that, that said person knows about his sexuality. When they don't know, he acts different and definitely wouldn't tease you, he's probably kicking himself in the dick right now."

"Well, it's not his fault he didn't know that I didn't know." Myles moves my hand. "You need to give him space, if you approach him he'll completely ignore your existence. He uses indifference to his advantage and makes them feel worse than they need to, trust me, he'll come to you."

Myles and I went to our apartments and I sat on my couch. I looked around and there was nothing that belonged to Nathaniel, he even took the purple teddy bear. Sitting on the couch in the empty room made me feel lonely.

'He uses indifference.' I sigh at the thought. Indifference is the opposite of love and knowing that Nathaniel was going to ignore me for a while made a large pain in my chest.