Part 1 - feelings

• - I open my eyes in the morning and feel that ... Another day came and I just wished I hadn't woken up, I get up with the wounds on my aching arm, maybe I better have thrown that blade away. I go to the kitchen and the only thing I have are crumbs ... I also expected to live with. I close the empty closet and go back to my room, a space with a corner bed and a wardrobe in the other corner, that's all, I lie in bed listening to the meows of the neighbor's cats, they were annoying but I preferred to hear them screaming of my parents "I pay the bills! Without me you can't survive" Just stupid, senseless fights, my brothers and my niece would just be on their cell phones and soon I would do the same. It was another day that I just wanted to disappear, but there was a living being waiting for my company. I left my room and went to the backyard to meet my small rusty dog, or as I usually call her. Nina, the 10 year old, the best part of my day and when I stay with her, I like to cuddle her while she tries to sleep, and the only living being in my house that I like being close to, but it's not like if she liked me, she usually avoids me to be close to my mother but i already got used to it, i just like her, right after i go back to my room settling in my bed thinking about how my future would be if that it hadn't happened. Let's see, I always liked animals, I would be a great veterinarian, but my memory is not so good for me to remember so many things they teach, I would forget everything and it would be the reason for the death of a helpless animal looking for help . I always liked to draw and trained for two years to have an anime trait, and although I didn't reach the level I wanted, I consider my drawings good and acceptable, what if in the future I was an animator? Who makes movies! Like disney princesses, I would make a film with my drawing line and it would be successful! But how to draw in the state I am in? I can't, I feel sad and discouraged, I will never be able to draw anything good this way. Right now I wake up, everything is black but I can see my body. I never liked the dark, but I feel comfortable being there, it is relaxing and silent, it is as if everything I experienced was just a nightmare that left marks on my skin. P1.feelings