Memories without return

- What are you thinking about now? Do I want to find entertainment for myself? Get rid of boredom or something more? You probably think I'm crazy, what's talking into this void? - questions were asked into the darkness with laughter

- In this void, I will tell you a story, my unknown friend. I'm not interested in what you think. I frankly don't care. You can sit down if you find a chair here. And I think I'll sit down – with some shortness of breath said a strange silhouette

- And now you can leave, I'm not holding.

Turning around and looking somewhere to the side, he continued to speak:

"Are you still here?" Okay, so be it, I'll tell you something. That's what you're here for. Are you sure about this? I'm definitely not, ha-ha-ha - the laughter was short-lived and sad, as if through force

Red clouds, when I was born or appeared, I saw red clouds. They were very beautiful and this color became everything to me. Thoughts are like sour milk, it has a taste, but not everyone likes it. I wanted to exist in this world and live without worries. I know it was too naive to want to live happily.

I still remember sitting in front of the TV as a little boy and watching a program about a superhero named Savior. Every time, he helped people out of trouble, and fought evil. He had strange colorful clothes, but for me he was alive, real. I wanted to be like him, and my head was trying to memorize every trick he performed.

I had a lot of figurines and posters on the wall, I was a real fan of him. I don't remember my family and my most vivid memory is only this cartoon about my favorite hero. I memorized and repeated his every move and blows from this series, wanting to become the same as this hero from my TV screen. Every day, every hour, every minute I watched him.

However, the efforts of a weak boy were not enough. I was still weak, I had to fight for food and even shelter over my head. The attitude of other people towards me was one of contempt and more than once they tried to beat me or even kill me.

- "Man is justice! I am a Lifeguard who will save you from any trouble!"

On the TV screen, under this majestic phrase for me, a heroic silhouette appeared in a heroic pose, dressed in a ridiculous costume and a mask on his face, as if made of gold. He had a thin body covered with muscles and several "rescue gadgets" on his belt. He had no superpowers and had to fight against monsters with his bare hands. The weapon in his hands was breaking fast and couldn't do enough damage to damage the monster. With one blow of the palm, the Rescuer could break stone slabs and ice like butter through a knife. The rescuer lives in a world where crime is daily and prefers to work alone, partners are a burden for him. His super hero base is under the mansion of a famous billionaire who was his old friend and decided to help the Rescuer in the fight against evil. He had to train daily and put himself at risk to protect people. And his main enemy was someone named Unknown. His main enemy was dressed in a black robe and always uttered in a deep bass tone at the end of the series, causing me goosebumps:

- "You're still too weak" - with a sigh

- "We will definitely meet again, Rescuer, do not think that you will be able to save everyone."

And disappeared like smoke with the help of his dark magic. I've seen every episode and the Lifeguard has always won them. However, people are tired of watching such a hero who never loses. And once in one of the episodes, a Rescuer under the influence of hallucinogens fatally wounded an important person for him, whom he wanted to protect.

For several episodes, the Rescuer became not himself and trained like a psycho. The veins were visible through his skin and sweat was dripping off him with every effort. His training regime included: hanging on a horizontal bar at the top of the tallest building, doing 1000 pull-ups and constantly exercising while being fatally high above the ground. Running with weights designed by his friend, which had a weight adjustable at will. The largest mark set on the weighting was 500 kilograms. And a lot of other crazy methods. While the Rescuer was busy training, the monsters for some unknown reason did not appear until the rescuer came out of his secret hideout and dipped his mask in his own blood and sweat.

After a while, the series was closed for an unknown reason. And all the episodes on the Rescuer were removed from the Internet and even his mention was too expensive.

- Well, how do you like this story ha?! - with some mischief, waving his arms, a dark thin silhouette said somewhere into the void

- I haven't remembered those days for a long time – this phrase was uttered with some pride

When suddenly a heavy and hoarse bass voice suddenly rang out from the shadows, interrupting him:

- Be quiet for a while. Just appeared here, and already so much noise.

That thin human form disappeared, fell silent and began to listen to his speech, filled with a sad tone:

- Don't turn around, I don't want you to see me. Your story doesn't sound so good to me. Let me tell you my story, consider it as a friendly gift from me.

The thin silhouette did not move and began to yawn. Ignoring his behavior, the voice from the darkness continued:

- Where to start, let me think.

You sit in silence for a while, hoping to hear more, or, on the contrary, you want to leave, you are still not completely sure of your choice. Until you start hearing another story and think that the second option is much better than the first. His interlocutors suffered from such thoughts.

- My childhood was not the best. I didn't have a mother and father, so it was hard to live. I stole, taking an example from other boys, but these were not serious thefts if they did not cross the threshold at the price tag.

- So one day I managed to find a broken TV, I took it to my house to sell it in parts. A "whole" TV is a real wealth and if you take it to the right place, you can live for another month without worrying about food. And if we talk about my appearance, just forget, you will find such dirty and unkempt people only in a garbage dump or near a landfill. However, it was good for me, I did not stand out among others. I was not bothered by my appearance, and if I succeeded, I washed in the river, which was located next to some factory on the border with a landfill.

- Water was collected on the river for drinking, and it was possible to wash, but soon this place was cordoned off by a high fence with a high voltage connected to it. Sometimes people found dogs and all kinds of animals fried near this fence. I'll tell you honestly, this "food" was very tasty.

- I haven't dared to sell that TV yet and was thinking about where to find the tools to disassemble it and sell the parts separately. Until I heard that tools had been carelessly left next to that fence near the river. However, no one had turned off the electricity, and the voltage was still coming to the fence, and the tools were next to it. But I was not a fool, and for a piece of bread I sent another to pick up tools. In this bad-smelling place, the strong and cunning survive, weaklings die and may regret their stupid life. That's what I thought until I was grabbed by people wearing gas masks with guns in their hands. I was still weak, and I didn't have the strength to fight. Especially when people began to make sacrifices for a drop of clean or "dirty water" so that it would rain and even began to drink their blood and urine to quench their thirst. Well, after that, everything is in a fog.

- That's the real story! Unlike your don 't understand what story - this phrase sounded with some satisfaction

No sound was made for a while, and then a thin man appeared in a long black raincoat with small holes on his clothes, which were immediately sealed by an invisible force. And in a hat with round edges, which did not allow you to see his face. Standing in the center of the void, a light came on, like a searchlight, and he, standing in the center of this light, said:

- Glad to see you, my old friends, we haven't seen each other for so long, what are you doing? Are you discussing your tragic past?

Not a sound came out, not a sound, until another thin, short silhouette came out of the darkness into the light. And held out his hand with some respect. His clothes were similar to the clothes of the new "guest" of this suicide party. Unlike him, he was completely wrapped in a long dark crimson cloak, which, if you look closely, made up all his clothes.

- Hey! Are you really hard to see in the dark?! Wear a bell or a flashlight on yourself, otherwise you can't be seen at all – shaking his hand, Mad Sainz said

"I'm glad to see you, too, Mad–" a thin guy in a purple raincoat said, unwillingly unclasping his hands

They looked at each other and seemed happy, but perhaps for them it was not so at all.

- You will still kiss the lovebirds. And then I'm too bored here ha-ha - pleased with his joke, said a deep bass

- Can I punch him, he talks too much - the man in the dark raincoat said with irritation

- You say the same amount. Okay, you sort it out here, and I'll go I still need to visit a lot of people - looking at the broken watch on his hand, Mad Sainz said

- Wait, maybe you can tell your story, - a deaf and heavy voice said with desire

Turning in the direction of the sound, Mad Sainz, performing a complex pirouette and rushing to the strange wooden door, said:

- Maybe next time. In the meantime, you can continue further – this phrase was uttered with mockery before he disappeared through this door, leaving his past acquaintances with a nervous smile on his face