Another Turn

I finished early that day and went back home .

As the night time came and everyone was sleeping ...I Couldn't.

I kept switching sides in my place trying to find a specific position that felt comfier for me to sleep at . I would at first and then the comfiness fades away as quickly.

I couldn't help stand up in my bed and look out the window outside the darkness of the night and the few city lights that were allumed and just adore it exhaustingly .

I looked inside my room again scanning every inch of it as if looking for something to distract me and help me sleep until ...I lay my eyes on that journal of mine .

The Journal of Atlas ....

I stood up and took it from the roof and sat back on my bed .

opening the journal continuing from where I stopped last time .

A new page of a new date was awaiting and I didn't resist to read it .

✨ Dear Diaries , Here I am coming to you and as faster and writing in you my decision as things took another turn for me.

I went again to The Supermarket were Atlas works .. it is the second time now after being absent for months , and I couldn't stop at last time so I went again to see him today with my sister and my two other friends whom are staying over at our house here .., but on the way there suddenly I felt like I'm hoping so high again and I'm gonna get myself hurt just like last time and probably even badly now , So I suddenly decided that this is going to be the last and final day I ever see him . My sister and Friends were surprised but they didn't believe me ..still they were scared because they were so supportive of us and whatever we had there .

As I went inside wearing my red jumpsuit and a white cardigan and with my hair in low bun with a cute red butterfly hairpin , walking around looking for things to buy I saw him ...as he did too , but it felt dead , it really felt like there's nothing there and that I got my clearance now after seeing him so there should be no more excuses for me to come him again , he probably moved on from that incident and it's over for good , so I decided to focus on food and what to get , our eyes met other few times but I thought it was just nothing. As we walked outside I saw him with his light blue shirt running to the guy who holds the bags outside were we leave them before getting in and chatting and laughing with him , my sister immediately smiled at my friends and they smirked back at her as they waited for me to go and grab my bag from there , so I immediately shook my head in denial and looked down while asked my sister to do it for me , she looked disappointed to ruin a what seemed in her head a "perfect moment for us " but she did it anyways.

On our way back home they tried to convince me that while I was busy choosing food he was all over me and everywhere I was , just kept showing up wherever we were just to be close from me but always ended up being called by his co-workers or someone, but I denied it because I just decided it was over and I didn't want another false hope to whatever we have between us , so we went back home to watch a movie and study after and I told them not to mention it again . ✨