10] A Realization

(Shin POV, Shin's house)

A week has passed since the start of the Devastation Arc, and school is about to start up again. Construction is picking up speed, and things are getting back to normal.

Horizon Academy is offering shelter for their students, allowing them to live in a dorm. I go see Aiya, but she hasn't left the hospital.

Shin- "Hey, how's-" I notice that she's asleep when I walk into the room, causing me to click my tongue. She's so vulnerable right now, I could end her and she wouldn't even know... 

My hand straightens out and my fingers are pointed at her neck, slowly getting closer. I grab my left hand with my right, preventing Aiya's demise.

I need her, I can't kill her yet. At least until I have full access to her Flair. I look up and see my expression in the mirror, scaring myself. I have a wide smile, with lifeless eyes. My expression quickly returns to normal, and I stumble back.

What was I just thinking? I can't kill her, she's important to the story... No! She's a friend, killing her is not allowed.

I need to get a hold of my emotions, so I'm isolating myself for a while. I write a note and leave it on the table, it basically says that I'm not going to be around for a little while. It also has a bit saying something about hoping that her and her brother feel better.

After writing that note I immediately head home, Hikari tries speaking to me. I push past her and lock myself in my room, doing nothing but meditating.

(Hikari POV, Shin's house)

What is wrong with Shin lately? After that chaos from a week ago, he's been acting strangely. I tried not to bring it up, but his expressions at times worried me. I walk up to his door, lightly knocking on it.

Hikari- "Shin? Are you alright?" Silence.

"I'm going to get some food, do you want to come?" I had hoped that this would bring him out, but he remained silent.

"Well, I'm leaving. But remember, you can always talk to me."

I would place food outside of his door, but it would never be eaten. A week passes and he hasn't eaten anything, and I'm even more worried.

I go and seek out Atlas, the only other person that I can talk to Shin about. I haven't seen this Aiya person, so I'm hoping Atlas can help me.

I approach Horizon Academy, but get stopped by a couple of guards.

Guard 1- "What is your reason for coming here?"

Hikari- "I came... to look for my brother's friend, all I know is that his name is Atlas. I don't know what his last name is, but something is going on with my brother. I was hoping that Atlas could help." They look at me skeptically, but decide to check with someone. They turn their attention back to me.

Guard 2- "What is your name, and your brother's name."

Hikari- "I'm Hikari, and my brother is Shin. Our last name is Vide." They talk with each other, and someone else using some kind of communicator.

Guard 1- "Your information checks out, please wait as we see if Atlas wishes to see you." I end up having to wait around ten minutes before Atlas makes his way to the gates, but I see that his expression has darkened. He is no longer the happy-go-lucky guy I met before.

Atlas- "What do you want." He says this as a statement, his words having a cold pressure applied to them.

Hikari- "I... I don't mean to be a bother, but I'm worried about Shin." At the mention of his name, his expression turns into a slightly more confused one.

Atlas- "What's wrong with Shin?"

Hikari- "He hasn't left his room in a week, and he hasn't said a word to me... He also hasn't eaten this whole time, but I can't check on him because he's locked me out of his room." I look to him, worry evident in my eyes.

"Do you think he's sick? Why is he doing this? He's never ignored me like this..." Atlas looks at me, his cold exterior shattered into one of worry. He looks at me like I'm a scared little child.

Atlas- "Don't cry, it'll be okay." I am confused by his words.

Hikari- "I'm not crying, what do you-" I bring my hands up to my face, only to feel tears streaming down them. I rub away the tears only for them to be immediately replaced by new ones.

"*Sniff* What's h-happening to me?" I Immediately crumble, my legs no longer being able to support me.

Atlas- "You're okay, Shin will be okay." He lightly pats my back, causing more tears to flow even harder than before.

"You're worried about him, that's why you're crying. It must be pretty bad for you to have become like this." I weakly nod my head, that being the only thing I can do right now.

After a while, I'm able to stand back up. My eyes hurting, my head pounding.

Atlas- "Can you tell me when he became like this?" I nod, sniffing one last time.

Hikari- "It was after he came back from visiting Aiya, saying that he needed to get something. But he came back, and completely ignored me before locking himself in his room. And that was last week, he hasn't come out since." He nods.

Atlas- "I see, let's go see her then. Maybe she can give us a clue." We head to Aiya's dorm room, as she's back from the hospital. Her brother is fine now, mostly thanks to her healing ability. Atlas knocks on the door, and a girl opens the door.

Aiya- "Atlas? What are you doing here? And who's this?" She seems sad, but like someone who got over their sadness.

Atlas- "This is Shin's sister, and she came to me for help." He then explains the situation to her.

Aiya- "I see. I actually got a note from him last week, so I guess he came by when I was asleep." She runs into a different room and comes back a few seconds later with a paper in her hands.

"This is it." She then begins to read it.

-----

I came by for something, but have instead gained something else. You were asleep when I came by, so I decided to leave a note before I accidentally (Marked out, illegible)

Don't fall asleep in public places (Marked out again)

I 𝚗̶𝚎̶𝚎̶- hope that you and your brother get better.

I'm going to be isolated for some time to stop fr(marked out)

Tell the school to f(scribbled over) that I won't be able to show up.

Shin

----

As we hear this written out loud, we can't help but start to worry.

Aiya- "What happened to him?"

Atlas- "I hope that he can pull through."

Hikari- "Maybe he's stressed?" They both look at me.

"He said that he would have found a healer for me by around this time, maybe he pushed himself to the breaking point."

Aiya- "Healer?" I nod.

Atlas- "What do you need a healer for?" I hesitantly answer.

Hikari- "My Flair is corrupting me, or something is corrupting my Flair which is corrupting me through use of my Flair." They look at me with sadness apparent on their faces.

"He said he needed a healer so that my body can be healed after he rips out what's corrupting me, but he can't do it himself. He said that I would die due to the fatality of the wound." Aiya speaks up.

Aiya- "I can play the part of healer, do you know what is corrupting you?" I shake my head.

Hikari- "He said I shouldn't do anything without him, especially getting healed. Because according to him, getting healed right now may fuse whatever's inside of me permanently." 

Atlas- "How does he know this?" I shrug.

Hikari- "He knows a lot of strange things, but he never tells me how he knows them."

(Shin POV, his room)

I've been here for a week, trying to get ahold of my violent tendencies.

It turns out, that due to the training my father put me through, I am extremely violent. I only figured this out after starting my villain career, because I've never killed someone so brutally before.

I've also learned that I take great joy in watching people suffer, and killing things is right up there with it.

So now I start having thoughts like: 'W̶͔̫͇̗̌h̠͓̥̿̓̆̈́͘ÿ̸̺̞͈̙̱̺̄ ̡̭̝̥͖̂̂̒͗é͔̩̝͚͙̰̟̤̾͞v̭͓̣̳̼̱̀͝ḙ͚͒̔̕ͅn̛̺̯̣̰̥͕̹͗ ̢̝̭̹͛̾͂b̨̩̱̖̟̘̯̥ͤo̴̠̪͉̩̒́͋̾ẗ̨͓̤͙͔̗̭̹͕̌ͤḩ̰̙̠̭̦̇e̺̯̤̦̣͚ͨ̔̓̐͝r͕͇̠̝̫̪̳̉̌̕ ̠͎͙̦͙̓ͮ̓͞ͅk̡̙̲̖̚e̗̲ͣ̚͡ë̴͚͉͙͆̃ͬp̷̫̱̥̫͍̪ͯi̞̲͉̬͇̽ͭ̆̕n̡̳̠͚͇̳͔͇̤̏g̍ͮͦ҉̼̦̱̳ͅ ̨̟̞͖͎̝͔͎͎̃̎̏͐A͕̙̪̯̤̜͂̓ͪ̕ẗ̢͚̤͍́ͤl͓̤̭̤̋́ͅȧ̩̙̮̫͖͉̠̆͐̀ṡ̺͙͓̣̔ͯͥ̕ ̥̣̥͕̬̗̭̪̽̈́͝a̹͓ͭ̕l̵͉͍̬̱͖̖͎ͬ͋̇i̘̘͓͋͘v̪̪̳̼͂̀̂̆̀e͇̯̤̮̙͓̪ͮ͡?̧̩͚̺̙̻̑̉ ̙̟̜̰͇͉͑ͣ͒͛͟H̗̗͓̻̳̱͕ͮ̋̋͘e̢̥̹̲̟̫͇̬͎̔̇ͪ̏̚͘'͇̹̟͖̘͉̫͋͡l̤̯̹̮̅̍̈͠l̶͔͔̄̒̓ͮ ̷̻̯̜̘͉̐b͍̭̏ͦ̏͜e̬̺̘͔̙͆ͤ͠ ͙̣͍̒ͨ̈̐͜ẗ̨̤͓̬̤̲̤̤̦̄ͥh̵͈͔ͤͮ͋̃ę̳̮̬̭̩́ ̠͕̖͒̑͢m̲̞͎̜͒ͦ̑͘ô̜̟͖͈͍͖̼̼̕s̴͔̭̹̘̯ͣͦt̨̝̅ͭ̌ͦͅ ͙̫̩̉̒̀f̟̫͖̰̌̈͊́u̖̗̗̠̹̱̞͆̀n͔̳ͬ̅͆̕ ̵̣͕͔̏̊͐ͤţ͖̤͕̳̱̏ͪͅo̴̫͙̘̦̮͚̰ͩ̓̌ͤ ̙͈͉̯̙̯̰̮̃̓͞s̷̞͎̬ͯh̬̞̬̻̻̙ͪ̏ͧ͠r̬̞̈́̈̍̽͟e̝̪͇͛̄͘ḏ̴̰̿͂̚ ͍͙͈͉̱̞̍͟t̛̠͓͙̼͚̺ͧͨͤͩͅơ̞̘̣̩ͨ ̱̻͔̰͓ͬͦ̕p͕̰̼̹̃̒͋͑̕i̴̫͓̝̞͙̠̫̮̅ͬe͉̳͔ͨ̒ͤ́ċ̢̞̞̭̠̚ͅe̶͎͚͈̗̭̘̻ͦͧ̃̂ş͍̲͖̍ͣ.̯̞͈̻̮̮ͮ̑̅͢.͇͇͇̯̙̭̠͓̎̕.̡̫͙̗̬̼́̈ ̊̔̐҉̳̤̙̗̫̘͉̖O̼̟̣̘̼ͤ̕h̘̱̼̭͂̑͌́̚ ̒̄̈҉͚̟͖̳̤̼ţ̘̻̜̥̑̑h̞̩̗̘͖͉͒͆͌̑̕ë̷̻̘̪̞́ ̧̠̯̼̄ͥl̴̙̤̗̭͔̖̜ͮő̯̯͂͐̓͡ọ̵̩͍ͧ̌͒k̸̺̙̱̺̺̘̍́ ̸̖̱̫̯ͮ̔̚o̘̙̯̹̬̱̍̄̿͊͠ͅn͇͖̪͎͐͞ ̢̹̩̝̹̙ͮ͌ͅh̲̙̥̲̾ͫ̉̐͟ͅỉ̛͎̫̗̫̫̺̚ͅs̶̪̙͈̋͛͊͆ ̻͖͖̞̜̂ͭ̚̕ḟ̵̠̖̮̆a̡͍̱̚c̷͖͚͔̭͓ͧ͗e̛̗̺͖͛.̶̹͔̩̫̼̤̼̋̋́̚ͅ.͖͎̝̚͞.̴̫̗̐̑ͯ̚'

I can at least control these impulses now, before I could barely hold them back.

Apparently, even thinking of things like that brings a smile to my face. Not an innocent smile, like a predator who found his prey. The prey being weak and wounded, an extremely easy to r̛̦̦͉̼͖̱͆̃ỉ̡̱͈̹̝͉̙̳̀̅p̳̗͇͉̲̞ͭ̽͞ ̡̜͙̙̇̿̅ͯa̷̹͓͍̞̭̺͆p̡̭͚ͦ̈̌a̵̮͉̲̖̍ͥr̷͔̪̼͂t̵͔͍̗̦͍̺̞̖̄̌̿!̧̹̖̠̋̏̈́̒

I've spent the entire day fixing this issue, and now I can at least hold back the smile. But now I'm worried that I'll just start smiling crazily in public, that's no image for a 'future hero' to have.

Luckily, I have all the time in the world to get myself under control. 

What confuses me is that I've not had any violent thoughts toward Hikari, nor have I had any impulses to kill her. That's why I didn't realize my problem until I saw Aiya.