A heavy heart

"Jason, there is a talk that I have been avoiding for some time now. Now that school is around the corner, I need to tell you something. It's not a very big deal, but you deserve to know it upfront and to hear it from me, so here it goes." Jenny took another deep breath and continued her words. Not giving Jason any room to talk, for fear that she would chicken out if she were interrupted. "I asked your mother to not interfere in the class placements for this year. I wanted to let fate decide if we would be in the same class again this year, or if we will be apart. This is our last year and I want to experience it like all the other students do. With the same good times and the same struggles. After that we will probably be in different schools all together as we head off to university, so this will be a good way to gradually get used to a change like that. That is if we end up in different classes. If not, then we can enjoy another year of being classmates, without the thought in the back of our minds and of those in the other students minds that we pulled strings to make that happen."

Without taking a break or a breath, Jenny rambled on. "I enjoyed being in the same class with you last year and we got a lot closer in that time, so I think it was a good experience for us. I don't think I would have enjoyed my time at Mountforth high, if you hadn't helped me through those first few months. But I think being in different classes will allow us to experience other things and create different kinds of memories. Just like what Harry and Julia had. You can come pick me up for lunch, we can make people envious as we share a loving moment when we part, we can borrow each other's books and such as we will have classes at different times of the day. We can cheer each other on from the windows when we are having PE outside. We can even face that struggle of choosing between cheering for your own class or the class that the other is in during sporting events. Waiting for each other after class till the other is done with their classes as well. Doesn't that sound great as well?"

Jason waited in silence for Jenny to finish. Jenny could feel the coldness that was surrounding him and didn't want to look up, but when someone doesn't reply it is very hard to keep a conversation going for a long time. She had run out of stuff to say, so now all she could do was wait for Jason's response. With a clenched jaw Jason asked Jenny "Are you done?". Jenny nodded her head and slowly looked up to face him. "I think it is no surprise that I am upset. That is probably the reason you felt like you had to hide this from me, but despite what you were thinking I do understand what you are saying and where you are coming from. I can't say I am happy that you did this and I am even less happy with you hiding it till the last moment, but if this is what you want, then I won't stop you." Jenny was very surprised by his reaction and she didn't think that he would accept her decision so easily, but the words that followed made her heart feel a little pained. "If you don't mind, I want to go to bed now. I am tired and my wounds hurt." Jason turned around without saying another word and got under the covers. He turned the lights off on his side and closed his eyes. Though there was no animosity in his words, and he had done nothing wrong in saying he wanted to go to sleep, she could feel his hurt and hurting him was the last thing she wanted to do.

Jason did so much to show her he cared for her and he had given her such a wonderful surprise today, but he got a rejection of his sweet intentions in return. But she couldn't let that surprise as another excuse to postpone their talk. If she didn't do it today, something else might come up tomorrow or the day after and before she would know it, it would be the first day of school and he would be blindsided by it instead. As painful as this was, that would be much worse, and he certainly didn't deserve finding out like that. As she sat in the half-darkened room, she looked at Jason's face that appeared to be sleeping, but she knew he was still awake. Knowing there wasn't much she could do to make this situation better for him, she decided she would respect his decision of not wanting to discuss it any further. She would give him the time and space he needed to come to terms with his own emotions. If he wanted to talk about it then, she would be ready for it. With a heavy heart she lowered herself to place a gentle kiss on his cheek before getting under the covers herself. She turned off the lights on her side of the bed, turning the room pitch black and went to sleep.

The moment the lights went off, Jason opened his eyes. With a hint of sadness, he laid still in the bed and stared at the darkness in front of him. He slowly turned to Jenny's side, where he found her almost completely hidden by the covers. He looked at the petite woman as her chest softly rising and falling with each breath she was taking. Though he was upset at the situation, he meant it when he said he understood where she was coming from. He also knew he couldn't keep her all to himself like a bird in a cage, no matter how much he might want to. If you love something, you should let it free. If it loves you back, it won't fly away. As these words went through his mind, he turned over to his other side and pulled the already sleeping Jenny into his arms. Instinctively Jenny snuggled against his chest and repositioned herself till she was fully comfortable, before continuing her deep slumber. From the moment they had decided to sleep in one bed, he had spent every night with her in his arms. He wouldn't let the first night in their new bedroom be spent in any other way over something as small as this. That would be punishing himself twice. With that he let out a deep breath before falling asleep as well. What both of them didn't know, was that tomorrow a little friend they hadn't seen in a long time would be coming for a visit, which would make them completely forget about these school matters.