Chapter 5: Screw you Kiritsugu

"A dog?" Kiritsugu says incredulously as he looks down at me. "What is a dog doing in the throne of heroes?" he asks the saber who is still standing right next to me as Iri walks over. Getting close she kneels down and tentatively places her hand on my head, seeing as I have no immediate reaction she lets a small smile come to her face and relaxes a tad while petting me.

It's kinda cute how innocent she is despite being a mother. And a robot destined to die in a ritual doomed to fail.

[That's both fucked up, and an accurate description of her.]

I find myself leaning into her touch, Dog nature I guess. Meanwhile, saber looks down in contemplation trying to think of an answer she won't find and after a while, she admits "I...Don't know"

Trust me Baber. I don't know either.

Kiritsugu just lets out a soft sigh and looks over to see his wife all over me. I had let my dog nature take over and now I'm laying down on my back as she rubs my belly, a goofy expression on my face, as I peek over at the slightly irritated look on Kiritsugu's face.

Heh. I just stole your wife.

[Now normally I don't like NTR, but ill allow it just this once]

Take that ya fat emotionless bastard!

[Well, I would go that far.]

I would. I mean who would choose 7 billion random people over your own wife and daughter? That's just stupid.

[To save the world? Duh.]

Screw the world!

[Huh?]

What has the world ever done for me?

[It gave birth to you for one.]

Do I look like a plant to you?

[That's not what I meant.]

It's what you said.

[*Sigh* I hate arguing with idiots. There is just no winning.]

I'm pretty sure I won.

[Choke on a dick.]

I'm not gay.

[Then choke on some chocolate or something just stop talking to me and open up your status already.]

Wait I have one of those?

[This is a gamer fan fic, Of course, you have one.]

Right, Right...Wait what?

[Just open the status]

Status

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Name: Finsivaas tolkriaan finlein

Class: Rider

Race: Caucasian Ovcharka

Age: Newborn

Vitality: E

Strength: E

Agility: E

Endurance: E

Mana: E

Luck: EX

NP: None

Skills - None

Inventory - None

Gacha Tickets: 5

Crystal Codes: 0

------------------------------------------------

You know. I would say that these stats are absolute shit when compared to every other servant in this war...And they are shit! I could be taken out my fucking El-Melloi, the prick, and easily I might add.

BUT, considering the fact that I am currently a 10 pounds baby Russian bear dog, of which can grow up to 3 and a half feet and 225 pounds, I'd say my potential for power is insane.

So it's not that bad.

[You have Five Gacha tickets. You wanna use em?]

Eh. Why not. My luck says EX so it SHOULD be good right?

[...]

R-right?

[Summoning now]

Don't you ignore me!

[You have used five tickets on a Mass pull!!! Spinning the wheel...Spinning the wheel...Spinning the wheel...Complete! Congratulations! You have pulled the following!]

I have a bad feeling about this

[A Box of chocolates! Common grade!!!]

What am I supposed to do with this? I'm a dog.

[5 Crystal codes!]

No clue if this is good or not.

[A Dictionary! Mythical grade!!!]

Why is that mythical grade?!?!

[A Muzzle! Common grade!!!]

Screw you.

*BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM*

Fireworks just exploded on the screen and a bright flash blinds me before I see something that leaves me weak in the knees.

[Congratulations!!! You have received a God-Tier Grade Skill.]

W-what the hell? I-is this real? Please tell me it's real.

[Damn, you lucky fucker]

Ha...Haha...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!

THIS IS AMAZING!!!

I JUST GOT...

-To Be continued