LittleWind
Imma be honest, It's too forced.. like, the dialogue and their reaction. why Would Lala suddenly talk about her family matter to someone she never&didn't even know before? It's as if, "oh wow! a bartender! surely nothing bad would happen if i blaber my private matter about my entire family and my races!" like that. even in the Cannon, altough she has lot of loose screw (innocent and almost idiot in my opinion) but she still wary with other.
LittleWind:Nah, it's fine. Thanks for the opinion anyway. I guess I'm not that good with conversation sometimes because I forget about the personalities of the characters I've written. Hehehe.