Comments of chapter undefined of The Unordinary Case of Whispering Pines

Okay, interesting. I like the direction this is heading, especially with the end and the description of the monster. But at the same time... What? First of all, some of the details of the plot and the case itself is confusing. Secondly, I know I said the writing can get better, considering it's only the beginning. But, in its current state, it kind of hinders my reading experience. Third, conversations are weird. Things are phrased in a weird manner (outside of story beats), inner dialogue (and even some characters' timing of sppech) isn't properly defined. And the conversations themselves are relatively short (although this is my personal opinion). I could say more but I don't think point any more problems that just lack of depth and short and confusing dialogue. I will specifically comment on paragraphs to help convey the criticisms better. However, as it stands, it still has potential and an intriguing narrative. It's just a bunch of things in between that's a little rattled.