Entrail_JI
such a hard read. the pacing of the paragraphs, the confusing changes in pov, the confusing story itself. Above all, the over dramatic ‘realism’ you’re trying to incorporate into your story. “how would some really act if they’d been put into someone else body?” Personally i hope i don’t act like a complete drooling, mindless idiot. I honestly don’t enjoy reading this type of jumbled “mystery” and i consider myself to be a fan of the mystery tag. This is an example of getting caught up into your own ideas and just spitting them out hoping it comes off as mysterious.