AdamFlores
The story has barely even started yet the MC already is both immortal and has op skills that make him Invincible. Gluttony is an ultimate lv skill that the mc shouldn't be able to even possess right now it can be used to devower an entire Honkai eruption the fact he knows "multiple" martial arts as an orphan and was able to enter Chiba Academy that is supported to be a prestigious school for the rich and politically powerful that was already a plot hole. And world travel ticket should be more expensive at the very least 1000 points and the all worlds compatibility should be worth at least 10,000 points if it was a singal world compatability it should be atleast 100 points. There's no build up no growth your just buffing a lv 1 character until his stats are max while sometimes a op character is entertaining I was expecting something at least a little series not grabbing a bunch of op skills that should make him Invincible he already was a mantis with op potential beyond human why would he need a new body his should already be better than any human except maybe a demigod. The story just started he hasn't even had the first encounter in his own world or a chat room mission but he can all ready world hop and why would he reincarnate again into tensura he didn't die he doesn't need a new body he should just appear on the world and be given 1 to 3 normal skills and 1 unique skill not multiple unique and an ultimate skill like Gluttony. And I don't know if you know but the immortality from having a code means he himself cannot possess a gease a gease is created by forming a contract with someone possessing a code if the contract is deemed fulfilled the recipient lose there gease but gain the code/immortality from the contractor.
AdamFlores:This doesn't really say much. Can you specify which aspects 'killed' the story? This fan fiction isn't perfect, but without telling me what killed the story for you, I can't really improve in writing