Comments of chapter undefined of MMORPG: Rise of The Dungeon Master.
MMORPG: Rise of The Dungeon Master.
Champsing
Chapter comments6
Writting a story is very hard. I am trying to write my own, so I understand the fact that it is not easy at all. So I admire the work that you have done so far. That said, I want to tell you what I liked about the story, I want to tell you what gripped me at the start: I was very interested in the dungeon, in his class, in his growth, in how he would evolve the snakes and how that would affect the rest of the world. I feel that the way the story is going forward is taking away from the strength of your story.
I really like the premise of the story. I like snake and I love monsters. When you sell me a story about a dungeon master creating snake monsters, I am super hyped, but we have yet to see one almost 100 chapters in. It’s the uniqueness and thus the strength of this novel, but you focus on guild wars and mafia stuff which are already used to the bones in 1000 chapters long novels. if the abyss guild is just a step up for Grave, we don’t need to know every nook and cranny about it.
I already made a review under the book but lets just make one about what I appreciate most about this book. They are on one side the dungeon system. It is just amazing with all the different things of the space village, time difference, Layout of bosses, evolution concept usw. The other would be character improvement, so that the mc and others see their mistakes and try to get better and correct them. As for what I hope that I am going to see. Maybe a little more of the real world? while the Background of mc is not there for any Friends or family, interactions with his brother and romance would be nice additions, even though currently I am quite satisfied since the interaction with his brother is good and it seems there is some romance breeding in between mc and his secretary/assistant Aria. Even though it is currently hard to say if they will have Feelings in the end since she is only shy and I can't really grasp mcs mind towards her.🤣 Overall you are doing great author. I also don't think that the guild wars part is a Bad thing or anything, especially since it is made directly after all those experminets and dungeon parts, it just depents in how you will bring it over and until now I quite like it. BUT while I don't think you will forget it but the main core of this novel is his dungeon class and the dungeon Management so please never forget it. A change of sorts from time to time is welcome though. Maybe just a little bit of what I have thought in between the novel to end the comment, there is a huge time difference between the game and space village and an even huger one without mc. How does this impact the mind of people/snakes or other species? For example mc should be mentally more fortified because of the long time in the dungeon in his past life, this was also nicely done by you in the past where he has a technique to save himself against the killings. Another thing is his dungeon assistant since she is the able to go in and outside and the time difference seems to be the actual one for her, how can mc take advantage with that like let her breed something while he is outside so that more time difference changes (I think he did it but I am not completely Sure if he was outside or all the time inside the dungeon), also it could be used for her character development like making her more dependent because of the loneliness. Let her make Friends with that one fairy in the freetime between breeding usw. There is lots of potential there but to be true quite hard to write. 😥 Nevertheless it is only a Suggestion, I am happy with whatever author makes as long as he is not destroying his characters personalitys and if possible pls no overly forced Plots or when they are light forced plots like the Flame guild now then explain why they Decided to attack the town in this life, which they didn't in his last. What exactly happened? This would change a forced Plot into something normal which is then a nice addition in the end. Anyway lets end the comment, thanks for All the chapters author and the great novel. I am already hyped how it is going to continue in the future and if there will be some romance. With kind regards Sinone Ps. while I don't even know if you will read all of this since in the end it somehow got slightly long.
