Comments of chapter undefined of When I woke up, I was in an Eroge World!
When I woke up, I was in an Eroge World!
The_POZ
Chapter comments15
Now that I'm done complaining I'll offer solutions Writers block sucks my friend, I go through it at times. The best solution I've found is to read other novels with a similar genre to yours. this usually helps me get inspired with new ideas to add to my story. another suggestion I'd give is if you're going to write a character(herione) you're sure the audience wont like at first. Try to make her come off in a positive life. Otherwise she'll probably suck the life out of your story. Oh and this chapter was really hard to read , I literally started skipping paragraphs (wich is never a good sign). Please take out that last paragraph you wrote about the world being a story it'll kill your story and take out all those A.N and silly jokes, they're not helping anyone. If you're going to forshadow a story make it subtle and leave small hints in the story. Mystery is Fun to unriddle. Your story is amazing! and I've always enjoyed reading it ( until recently). Don't stress yourself too much , you'll get back in your zone soon. I Know it.
Oh right , as for my opinion regarding this and the last chapter(well mainly the last chapter).... Personally . There are too many A.N inside the story as well as cliche jokes that don't feel funny at all. The fact that the system told the mc he's a fictional character , really ruined whatever immersion remained in this chapter and at one point I even entertained the thought that you forgot to delete that last paragraph. I also don't like the fact that this story is starting to lean toward a tragic side (though I undertand your need for realism , I'm just saying try not to make your story focus on the tragic side too much, us readers like unconsciously escaping into the world of your book and if it focuses on Tragedy and stupid decisions that remind us of reality we tend to leave.) Also I've been wanting to say this for a while but God I hate the latest heroine you introduced into the story ( the one who took the mc's virginity , I can say for a matter of fact ever since she was introduced to this story , the chapters went downhill. I get you tried to make her realistic ,mysterious and somewhat powerful. But she irks me , the way she was presented in the story made her come off as a psychopathic pervet who lied about being a virgin just to sleep with the mc. Uhg maybe she's for character development? ) Anyway it's your story and you write what you want at the end of the day all I'm giving off is my opinion Oh another thing I notice is in recent chapters your story has been lacking any sense of mystery due to your A.N , you tell people way too much about what's coming in the future (like the mc's younger sister soon becoming a Yandere?) that when these things finally happen there's no sense of shock , suprise or excitement at all. In short stop snitching to your readers and keep 98% of the future plot a mystery. We'll defenitly enjoy more.
