John_Doever
Although I can appreciate some comedic moments. This âFiskâ charactor is getting on my nerves. There should be some seriousness and the idea of undead talking back to their masters over a game doesnât fit properly here. The undead legion should be absolutely loyal. Meaning things like video games shouldnât not be a thing the undead are doing. Though I do greatly appreciate dynamite girl and the heists rivalry. It shows that some of the morals and ideals are still instilled in the minds of his troop.
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There's a lot of math errors in this chapter! For one thing: If Aldrich has his magic stat increased to 34, his maximum MP should be 102, not 90. I have no idea where you got the number 90 from. Also, the new bear and eagle are reanimated at levels 8 and 7 respectively. However, when he's looking at the list of his undead in the next moment, they are inexplicably both 1 level higher! Did you just forget what level they were or did you write it down incorrectly the first time? You've already told us that aside from chosen undead, regular undead in the army can't level up, so this makes no sense. I know it sounds like I'm complaining over nothing important, but mathematical accuracy in system stories is very important to me as well as many others. It's also really hard to fix retroactively if the story going forward is dependent on the numbers being what they are(even though they're inaccurate).