Entrail_JI
Okay, so I'm horrible at giving feedback but I will try and this is just my opinion. To me Ren's hysteria didn't feel like hysteria at all. It was kind of... I feel like I'm missing something. For example, how his eyes looked and the expression on his face. Maybe also the thoughts on his mind? Also, how about making Ava's and Hein's reaction a bit more dramatic by having them call Ren more that once to get him out of his hysteria? Don't know if anything I just said makes sense. Please, just don't be offended and don't hate me.