Comments of chapter undefined of In A Marvelous World With DnD Books

Honestly this chapter was super disappointing. And I mean super disappointing. If he wants to have a one night stand then sure go for it. But it should not include things like saying you love each other. Plus the comment about pure blood seemed forced and just trying to point out that the woman was pure blood for no reason. I highly recommend editing the chapter. Change it portray the woman as being demanding. She wants to have *** and thus is aggressive about what she wants (not necessarily aggressive in having ***). Just non of that love crap since they don’t even know each other’s names. Also you should write something in the main story that hints at what happens. So if someone doesn’t want to read this chapter they know what happened. That is unless she wiped his memories. BTW one of the selling points of your story is that it’s not just a power wank where the MC gets shit out of nowhere. I can understand goblin scrip being dwarven script, sure it’s a bit forced but it works. And I can understand a Pure Blood lady finding someone attractive so she mounts him. But people don’t write it as if they are in a relationship it should be more primal and passion driven instead of intimate love making between 2 people who love each other. Honestly since the gotcha was added to the story it’s been dropping in quality. At first it was progressing a pt a decent pace but then it’s one big event after another and it feels somewhat forced. I can understand if you just want to rush with setting things up, but I highly recommend slowing down.