Comments of chapter undefined of The Gamer in Another World

It really needs editing... I’ll even edit it because it seems like an okay story. It’s just the grammar

bad grammar needs editing

Definitely needs work. Grammar problems, cringeworthy character reactions and sayings, and a stupid death that defy's common sense (and not in a good way or even amusing way.)

If lightning hit an antenna why was he killed ?

Grammar has maximum the good of quality

The Caveman gamer

X

See this! I just gifted the story: Balloon

P

a

a

tr

a

q

a

See this! I just gifted the story: Balloon

uwiaiiaaj

Abc

a

You say "hmmf" and other grunting sounds way too much Just saying, real english speakers or humans in general, dont speak that way. Unless your really wierd.