Comments of chapter undefined of The Satan CEO's Woman: He Unexpectedly Fell in Love with Her

OrieNovel:Nice analysis my dear reader. hahhahahaahha. I miss these types of comments from you every end of the chapter. ***Slight Trigger Warning*** To tell you honestly, I really designed for one of the MC's to atleast have this issue. Why? Because, I can relate much. Though I am not diagnosed by a professional (because I am scared to see one, lol) I know I am different. I can be emotionally detached to someone in an instant. I could go from being clingy to be cold person in an instant. Good thing I didn't turn into a serial killer. That would be really creepy. Maybe that's my defense mechanism. I've gone through a lot of emotional trauma in the past. Since childhood. My mother and sometimes my father had the habbit of beating me with a stick, hanger, or anything hard when I did something bad. I know it was their way of deaciplining me. Sometimes, my playmates would see it. I didn't understand why they were doing that back then. Of course, now I did. I grew up feeling that they didn't love me. That I am unwanted, unloved. Of course it stopped when I reached nine or ten I guess. I could not really recall when it ended. Because I still have two more younger siblings after me, my mama was always busy doing chores to the point that she didn't have time to attend meetings where in my teacher would distribute our report cards to them every grading period. Of course I always felt sad as most of my classmates had their mothers attending for them where there I was being left alone. Alone...I'm always used to being alone. I could survive not going out of the house for a year given that there food supplies in the pantry. I don't have friends much friends. Most of them, I only meet at school or in the workplace but I really didn't keep on touch with them often so after some time, from being friends to mere acquaintance. I don't even know if they could still remember me. That I once exist in their life. It's never easy to speak and overcome it. Truth enough, maybe because of those experiences I had in the past, I always feel down. Like wanting to end everything and say goodbye for the last time. It came to the point that I asked myself if someone would cry when I am gone. Maybe one, ten. A few perhaps. The thought of ending my life had been there since I was six. Of course I got the idea from the television shows I had watched without the supervision of the adults. Good thing I didn't have the courage to do so. I'm afraid of pain and what life had brought me so far was always pain (maybe because all i recalled were painful memories and never the good ones). How ironic right? The way to stop all the emotional pain in my heart is through physical pain, too. Therefore, I could not do it. I didn't want to suffer while slowly feeling myself die. Yeah. Call me ungrateful for that. I know there were few people who were in much worse situations than I did. But that's them, this is me. Maybe their method of staying mentally and emotionally strong despite of the circumstances worked for them while mine doesn't. Thankfully, I found my comfort in music, reading and then finally writting. Yup, to those things and not even my family. I'm afraid to tell them because I am afraid that they would never understand me. That they would be indenial of what is really happening to me. Of what is really happening inside my head. I'm scared that they would only try to understand but not fully understand me. That instead of helping me address the issues, they would force me to believe that it's all in my head. That I should chage my mindset into this, into that. As I said, it's only easy to say but hard to do. So for now writting is my form of therapy (*sort of). And I think I would be lost again if one day, I'll be forced to stop writting. So that's how weird and emotionally unstable I am. --Orie