82 79 It's Just a Prank bro

It barely takes a full day of running for Tsunade and I to reach the Eastern front, and I must say, having a definitive measure for how much I've grown feels amazing and has me hyped up for the fight to come.

Though I have to say, it certainly feels different going out on a mission without wearing my ANBU gear, well, I'm still carrying all of my stuff thanks to my tattoos, but to be doing a mission without a mask..

Wait a minute.

Is this the first time I'm doing a mission without a mask? I suppose it would depend on how you define 'mask'. I think, remembering my various infiltration missions.

I shake my head of these unimportant thoughts as Tsunade and I clear the forest behind us and land in a grasslands that extends all the way to the sands of the shoreline separating our borders from Kiri's.

If there is one good thing about fighting Kiri, it's that they can't exactly pull a sneak attack, but then you remember all the kekkei genkai's Kiri has and suddenly that advantage doesn't seem too meaningful anymore.

Especially since we can't even turn the sea against them as they approach, what with the various water specialised kekkei genkai they have access to, which is why this forward base is set up so as to allow them a foothold on the sand, so we can fight away from the sea.

Home land advantage is very important after all.

As I look around, I can't help but gape slightly at the sight I am greeted with.

𝘛𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘴 of Shinobi and Kunoichi alike either manning defensive walls and towers, built with actual wood instead of earth Jutsu, so that those same Jutsu can't simply tear them down, or simply roaming around, sitting in groups around a fire, eating, though no one is drinking, understandably.

The sight is impressive nonetheless, a veritable wall of white tents, each filled with men and woman each ready to fight and just past that a ten foot tall and almost as thick wall stands as a bastion stretching as far as the eye can see in each direction.

Considering the speed at which this was constructed, China would be jealous.

The fact that it's this busy even in the late evening it is, I wonder what it would be like during daylight.

I wonder briefly why this is so different compared to my experience in the last war, but the answer comes readily enough.

In the last war, no one was really in a rush, so everyone had their soldiers on rotation, one group fights and the other recovers then they swap. A sound strategy, except it dragged the war on for so long that everyone started running out of recources.

Now, now no one wants to drag things out, which means deploying everyone all at once, resulting in more than double the number of Ninja at each front compared to last time.

It sure makes an intimidating sight, especially when you stop to consider that this means Kiri will likely respond equally.

That thought brings another to my mind that is quite worrying. While Kiri doesn't have the largest Shinobi population, I wonder why, they also only have two borders, Kumo and us. So they only have to split their forces two ways.

By my estimate that would make them out number us three to two, maybe even closer to two to one. You don't need to be a general to understand that that is not a good thing for us. But we have the Mountain Crusher herself on our side, so I'm sure we'll be fine.

As soon as that though passes through my mind, Tsunade's head snaps to face mine from where it was observing the camp as I was.

"Stop thinking rude things, we need to find the commander in charge here."

Woman's intuition huh.

Thankfully we don't need to go looking as not a moment later a group of masked Shinobi appear and incline their heads in respect to Tsunade while completely ignoring me. Rude.

"tsunade-sama, shikagi-sama has been expecting you, if you would follow us."

His words make me freeze slightly and give the ANBU a bland smile with no mirth whatsoever behind it. Shikagi. Shikaku's daddy dearest. Also known as the guy who took Yoshino away form me.

My own thoughts make me freeze again, since when did I ever care about that? I'm not sure. Maybe I just want to be dramatic? Let's go with that.

Tsunade also startles when she hears the name and sends a worried glance my way, but I just keep my mirthless smile and gesture for us to get moving.

She still seems worried but clearly isn't about to make a scene in public, I like that she isn't as confrontational as she used to be.

We follow the group of ANBU as they lead us towards a slightly larger tent, during which I notice them talking amongst each other in ANBU sign, something that is illegal to teach to anyone who isn't ANBU, which is why Tsunade doesn't catch what they are saying.

It almost makes me crack a laugh at how they talk about me, confused as to who I am, most of them have assumed I'm an apprentice of Tsunade's or something similar. It makes sense, after all, without my mask, I am a nobody.

At least I was, something tells me that that won't be the case for much longer.

We reach the tent and the ANBU stay outside as I follow Tsunade in, even though I technically outrank her, even if in reality she can order me about since she's one of the Hokage's students. Got to love nepotism eh?

We enter and are greeted with a number of men standing over a large rectangular table as they discuss troop formations and such in a surprisingly civil manner. The movies lied to me, where is all of the unhelpful shouting and arguing, why are they all being reasonable and rational.

So disappointing, if this was a bet, I would have lost.

Our entrance quickly brings silence to the large tent as everyone inside takes note of our forms, though there eyes mostly keep to Tsunade after a perfunctory once over of me, tough whether that's because she's a bigger asset, or because of her bigger assets I couldn't tell you.

The way everyone is disregarding me is kind of annoying me though, so I decide to play a little prank. What could go wrong?

Shikagi is the first to speak, his voice a low timbre, matching his slightly greying sort black hairs and slumped posture, but his eyes are keen in such sharp contrast to the rest of his figure, denoting his Nara intelligence no doubt.

"Tsunade-san, I trust you faced no complications on your trip here?" He somehow manages to sound condescending or maybe that's just my growing dislike of him clouding my judgement.

Why I am starting to hate this man I have no idea, he's never done anything to me, except that Yoshino business but I don't really care about that, do I?

"The trip was fine, but I'd prefer if we could focus on more important matters Nara-san, as ordered by the Hokage himself, this operation is now under the command of my partner and I and as such I would like a full rundown on the current situation."

Heh, it's all I can do to keep from laughing at the way Shikagi bristles at Tsunade's subtle insult. See, he greeted her as Tsunade-san, showing respect for her as a person, as is deserved, but she referred to him as Nara-san, thus implying that he is not worthy of respect beyond what is afforded to him as a Nara.

It almost makes me smile, knowing that her dislike of him comes solely from his actions against myself, what a sweetheart she is.

It's not like anyone here is going to speak up against her either, to do so would be political suicide, I however, have no such known backing, thus the next person to speak up directs his words to me instead.

Well, he was still talking to Tsunade, but he was talking about me so obviously I am going to answer, I have my prank to consider after all.

The one who speaks up next is an Uchiha, obvious from the black hair and eyes, oh, and the five hundred prints of his clan symbol decorating his clothing. I may be exaggerating on the number, but seriously, I get the importance branding but there is a limit.

Anyway, he stands relatively short, easily the shortest in the room, and he has an unpleasant disposition that has me thinking he has a Napoleon complex.

"And who is this boy besides you? He hardly looks like he will be any use here." He says with a sneer and I quickly speak up before anyone else can.

Putting on the most pitiful and submissive act I can, I twist myself nervously and lean slightly as if I want to hide behind Tsunade.

"H-hi, I, um, I'm Tsunade-hime's boy toy for cold nights, uhm, I'm sorry but only Tsunade-hime is allowed to make use of me, but uhm, if you ask nicely, then maybe she will let you have a turn?"

Ah, glorious silence. No one makes a word as there stares alternate between my nervously shifting form and Tsunade's slowly reddening face.

Right as I'm about to break character and start laughing at all their dumb faces, Tsunade suddenly punches me in the side of the head, sending me straight to the floor and cracking it slightly from the force, not to mention dazing me.

"THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!!"

I can't help it, even through the ringing in my head, I burst out laughing.

As I roll on the floor laughing and wheezing I realise that I haven't laughed this hard in years.

Most of everyone present seems pretty amused by the situation too, the notable exceptions being Shikagi, the Uchiha and a Hyuuga. Oh and Tsunade of course, though she seems to be doing some breathing exercises to calm her temper.

Eventually I manage to get my breath under control again and I stand back up, studiously ignoring the venomous glares that follow me as I do so. At least some people have a sense of humour, as I can see an Inuzuka woman who's shoulders are still shaking in silent laughter.

Wait a minute, I recognise her, that's Tsume. Didn't Jun end up having to marry her or something? Speaking of, I wonder how the guys are doing, I didn't get to see any of them since I got back.

Getting to my feet properly, I bow with a theatrical flourish, not bothering to hide my smile as I introduce myself properly.

"Greetings boys, girls and elderly, my name is Hanabira Haruno and I am here to help Tsunade-chan hold of the big bad Jinchurriki. A pleasure." I punctuate my introduction with a wink too.

The light of recognition flashes in Shikagi's eyes as I say my name, and he speaks up again before anything else.

"You're that boy who was trying to get in the way of my son's marriage." He says, accusing.

"Indeed, I'm the boy who Yoshino wanted to marry before you forced your son upon her, though I fail to see how that has any relevance at this point in time." I am quick to shoot back my own reply, though I make sure to keep my voice purposefully nonchalant, but not hiding the anger underneath.

The peanut gallery, meanwhile, have their heads going back and forth like they are watching a tennis match.

It's also only now that I realise why I dislike this man so much. It isn't some hidden love kind of thing. Rather I think it might actually be a side affect of becoming a Sage, since it's something that I noticed in Minato was enhanced after he became a Sage.

Yes, what has changed about me is simple.

𝘗𝘳𝘪𝘥𝘦.

I wan never a very prideful person, or at least, not in the typical sense. But now, now I feel insulted that this worm would dare to take something of mine. Even though I was planning on breaking up with her anyway, the fact that he sought to take her from me pisses me off in a way that it didn't before.

Well, now that I know to be on the lookout for it, I'm sure it won't be a problem, especially since my new pride seems to be more focused on being insulted, rather than Minato, I'm not about to start overestimating myself.

I know exactly how good I am, and I am certainly better than everyone here, Tsunade being an exception in some cases, so for him to look down on me like that, well it makes me want to do something.

Nothing serious mind you, just make his life difficult or something.

Whatever, enough of this introspection, we have work to do now that the posturing is over.

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A/N: He~llo! Dear readers!

Just got a haircut and I am one smexy mannie (✿◡‿◡)

Are you guys ready for a fight? because I'm looking forward to a big fight. I want some action already!

I'm happy to say that from this point onwards it should be a lot of action up until the epilogue.

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