1 Just A Burden

A.N: These short stories that are written might trigger anxiety, depression, and other unstable or mentally ill things. I am writing these stories from what I feel I that I should write. I'm not sure if this is going to be a series, but I feel it shouldn't. Enjoy.

"Why am I here again? Oh right, I tired to-"

Suddenly, my thoughts stopped as I heard the voice of a woman and a man through the hallways of the hospital. The door slowly opened, and I saw a nurse who looked about 5,6, and in her mid 20's. I laid back down on the uncomfortable bed as the lady looked at me with an annoyed and sorrowful look.

"You're lucky to be alive. What you did there was a risky move. Do you want me to bring your parents in?"

"My parents? When did they arrive here? They were 7 hours away... How did they find me?"

Thoughts flooded my head as I couldn't answer since it was too late. My mother and father arrived at the room telling the nurse to leave. My dad looked unimpressed, and my mom, well... she looked like she never cared what had happened to me.

"So this is the thanks we get for raising you? You act like we've never cared about you. Not only that, but you were cutting yourself?! How stupid so you have to be to do that, I've spent all of my hard-working money on you. I shouldn't. No, actually, you shouldn't even deserve loving parents. What happens if we die, huh? You'll be begging for forgiveness and wishing that you would've listened to us."

My mother lectured me as I lay there emotionless, I hated her. I hated dad. I hated how she tried to make me better. I hated how dad tried to bring back the old daughter that he wished for. I hate them so much. I want to kill them. I want to kill both of them. Let's kill both of them...

After getting discharged from the hospital, it was a long drive home. The car was silent, and no one talked. The only sounds I heard were my breathing, the car engine, cars passing by, the rapid wind outside of the car, and the loud ringing in my ears. Why was I the problem? I have a perfect life, but I feel sad, lonely, upset, depressed, and broken.

What it felt like hours we finally arrived home, my parents and I didn't bother talking about the incident. I went to my room and locked myself in the bathroom, I turned on the water from the tub and waited until it got warm. I took off my clothes, seeing all of the flaws of myself.

"Why aren't I happy? Why do I have to hate my body? I wish I could look like them. I want to kill myself..."

As the water was warmed up, I went ahead and went inside the tub. I like bubbles. They were small, medium, or big. They could change their shape and not feel bad about it. That's why I love them. I turned off the water and got out of the bathroom. I changed into a gray t-shirt and black sweatpants.

"Dinner is ready. Come down and eat if you want to."

My father yelled from the kitchen. I decided to get out of my room and went towards the dinner table. We sat in silence, and we both know that if either of us talks, it would just lead to us not even eating dinner. I took a bite of the food, too much salt, probably from dad's salty ass attitude. As I finished my plate, I went ahead and grabbed my dish to wash the dishes. I grabbed a kitchen knife from one of the cabinets and left to my room.

"No one saw. That's good."

I locked my bedroom door and stared at the knife. I held the knife close to my wrist and started to make lines. The blood leaking down my hands, running through my wrist. When have I felt like this before? Have I done this before? Oh yeah, I tried to kill myself by starving myself.

Midnight falls in. It was quite in the household. This house holds memories. Hair holds memories. Scars holds memories.

"Let's make a memory."

I grabbed a scissor from my desk and went to the bathroom. The mirror facing me, my reflection. I started cutting my hair, and I want to lose these memories. I want to make new ones. I started to unlock my door and went to my parents' bedroom. Let's make a memory mother and father. I then grabbed the knife that I took from the kitchen and started stabbing them endlessly.

I felt happy. I felt free. Let's make memories.

"I'm sorry that I was a burden. I didn't mean too. I just wanted to make you proud. I love you, Mama and Papa."

I grabbed the knife and held it to my throat, I'll see them soon...