10 THE HUG THAT I WANTED FOR SO LONG

[ELLIS' POV]

After I left his penthouse, I've decided to walk by the park near my condominium.

I sat by the bench and stare at the night sky.

"SHIT!" I shouted.

What just happened earlier?

I mean, why did I act so rude to him? I know he's trying to make a conversation and he remembered our memories together but why did I react in that way?

"It's his fault anyway! I mean, he's trying to bring back the past which is not the point right now. The point is... why he left and why he didn't call or message me all these years!"

I said to myself.

"Also, why did he want to pinch my cheeks? Why did he say he adores me? Is that intentional? Why did he say I'm cute? Why? I'm already a man! A man that is... a man that is..." I stopped.

I sigh.

"What am I? If he knows... if he knows that I have a boyfriend... if he knows what I've been through... will he shout at me? Will he be mad?"

But...

"What is his relationship to the guy with glasses? How about Eryx?"

The way that guy in the glasses takes care of him, gives attention to him all the time, also, not only that he is his secretary but I think there also friends!

I mean, I don't mind that he has many friends but the way that guy looks at him... it's different!

Also, Eryx... What are they? Why are they so close that even the keys in his penthouse... he knows. Why did Eryx smile when he saw him? Why?

"Fuck. I'm crying again." I said to myself.

"Dione," I remember what she said the other day about them.

"Ros is the CEO and Eryx is the COO. She said that they're close like... more than friends. Is that true? Is there a meaning behind their friendship? I don't know what else to think. It hurts!" I put my hands to my head.

"IT HURTS!" I yelled.

——-

"Ellis. What happened to your eyes?"

"I didn't sleep," I answered truthfully.

As soon as the sun rises, I went straight to the shop to stay there while waiting for the time to open.

Dione went for a jog and she called me if I'm awake already, I said to her that I'm already at the shop which she hurried.

"Oh." Her reaction... she knew.

"Did you guys talk already?" She asked.

"We didn't talk, talk. There are people everywhere and he's not trying to get my point, so... I don't think our reunion will be successful."

"What are you saying? You have to tell him how you feel."

I froze.

WHAT DID SHE SAY?

"W-what do you mean how I feel?"

"That you've missed each other and you deserve to be brothers again..." She says and continues, "What are you thinking?"

"N-nothing!" I deny.

"Anyway, if only I knew that your brother is the CEO of Pinetree Corporation, I would drag him here and meet you." She sarcastically said.

"Are you sure you can drag him here, literally?"

"I mean, drag you there!" She remarks, "You know he's my boss and my future-to-be-husband." She's shrieking and I look at her.

"Dream on," I say and I drink my hot caramel macchiato.

"Come on, I know he doesn't have a girlfriend, you can set me up with him?"

"No!" I quickly said and she looks shocked.

Quick! I should say something!

Dione is smart and she will have an idea that I'm so protective of him. Then she will ask me why I'm being so denial and all.

Say something to her! Quick!

"U-hmm... I didn't mean harshly. You're pretty and smart, Dione. But..."

Okay, I'm doing good. Continue...

"But what?" Her eyebrows went up, waiting for my answer.

Quick!

"But, I don't think he's into relationships right now," I said.

Okay, that's safe to say.

"Do you think so? Maybe I should ask him."

"You can't."

"Whatever." She drinks her iced Americano.

"Forgot what I've said that I'm shipping you with him, okay? Which is um, not going to happen-"

"Why?"

Wait, did I just panic and say that?

Okay, go! Add something to your 'why? Hurry, you idiot, Ellis.

"I mean, it's not your fault that you didn't know, okay? It's normal." I say to her and continues, "...We're not brothers."

She pauses, "What do you mean?"

"Mom... his mom adopted me at an orphanage because my biological mom died which turns out his mom's best friend," I explained.

I looked at her and she's about to cry.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry." She softly says.

"Go on, continue." She added.

I let her cry, for now, she's in the mood for that, I would not stop her.

"Well, in short, we're not related by blood."

"So, it means, you have feelings for him?"

My eyes widen.

"Fuck, Dione, what are you saying?!"

Okay, I'm in panic right now.

"Sorry, I've watched too many dramas recently. Anyway, whatever you're feeling about him, not romantically or anything, it's normal. Based on your reactions and expressions about him, he was a good brother to you and I understand that. But, you have to let him know how you truly feel so that he knows what point you're taking in, okay?"

She's right.

But telling him what I feel might ruin everything, so I should not do that.

"Thank you, Dione." I softly said.

She smiles.

Knock! Knock!

We both looked at the door and our eyes widen. NO WAY!

"C-CEO!" Dione reacted.

"R-Ros?"

She stood up and before she opens the door, she says, "Speak of an angel."

I rolled my eyes as she opens the door for him.

What is he doing here? How did he know that I'm here in the first store? Then, I suddenly remember, this is where we used to hang out and bother mom all the time.

I think he just guessed that I would be here.

"Hi." He greets.

"Hi, Mr. Beckett, are you visiting Ellis?"

"You can just call me Eros, a friend of Ellis is a friend of mine." He smiles at her and Dione is blushing literally.

I should take her away from him, for now.

"And yes, I'm visiting my little brother." He added and he looks at me.

I looked away and drinks my coffee.

"Uhmm... I would like to stay but, I should better go now." Dione says.

Wait!

Go? Now? But. If she goes now, I will be alone... with him.

I would like to take away Dione now but I think it's bad timing. She should stay first!

"D-Dione." I called and she's already waving at me, "Y-you should stay-"

"Bye, Ellis! Goodbye, Mr... I mean, goodbye, Eros." She smiles and went away.

"She's sweet." He compliments her.

"What are you doing here?" I asked as I stood up and walk by the office.

"I'm quite busy since I'm about to open the store," I added.

He's smiling, "The store is still the same, El. I've missed this."

He's changing the subject which he's avoiding my patience.

"Really? Well, the store doesn't miss you."

I replied and he looks at me.

"Maybe the person who owns it misses me."

He shot back and I remained still.

Shit. Is he seriously said that?

"Stop following me," I said as I get my key from my pocket.

"So, this is the office that you're using, it's mom's but it suits you. And remember the time that you always hide here when we were playing hide n' seek?"

He says and I turned around to face him.

"Ros. What are you doing?"

"I want to say what I want to say."

"Stop it, okay?" I'm getting serious.

Whenever he says those kinds of things to me, it brings back the memories that I have from the past and it hurts... so much.

"Stop what, El? The words that I'm trying to tell you?"

He's pushing his own words at me than trying to realize my point of view.

I'm already leaning against the door of my office and he's moving closer and closer to me.

I don't know what kind of facial expression he wants me to see from him, this is new to me... when it comes to him.

But, he's not trying to understand why I'm reacting this way. He doesn't understand me!

"I don't want any of your words. I don't need it, okay? What you're trying to do is not going to work on me." I said and I turned around to open the door.

"Okay, I get it. But, I still want to talk and I was hoping if we could-"

Ring! Ring!

His phone is ringing again like last time.

"You're a busy man, Ros. People need you."

"El, I only need you. There are things to be clear of-"

Need me.

Does he need me? Only needs me?

Ring! Ring!

"Just answer the damn phone," I say.

"One sec." He says and he pulls his phone from his vest pocket and answers it in front of me.

I didn't bother whatever he's doing, so I just went to my table and scan through the papers, I need to work on this as well.

"Cancel it. Yes, Griffin, just reschedule it." He says and I stopped holding the papers.

"Bye." He added.

"Now, El, let's talk." He finally said.

I turn to face him and he's getting serious.

"You've canceled your schedules on me? Are you dumb? It's your work and now, I'm blaming myself about it because it's-"

"El."

"Don't El me, okay? I'm not done talking, you idiot." I answered him.

"El."

"I said don't call me-" He suddenly cuts me off when he hugs me, I froze.

"I've missed you, El." He says as he's still hugging me and I don't know what I'm feeling right now.

Is this wrong? Is it okay?

Why do I feel SO MUCH okay with this even though it's SO WRONG?

——-